Poll: Is this ok?

[Kinguendo]

She's not super hot but she is the nicest person I know. I went out with her for a year and I know that it was something real, not "how I love my xbox".

I am not accusing you of having the hots for a cartoon woman so lets just cut back with the "something real" stuff, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.

You can only measure the level of your feelings against how much you have felt prior to that... for example, you get kicked in the nuts... a terrible pain indeed... but you havent exactly been shot in the face.

EDIT: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

"She is the nicest person you know"... Okay, lets see how events unfold and then see how quickly that changes to "She is a heartless b*tch". Honestly, if your friend does end up dating her are you just going to blame it all on him?

 

[CrysisMcGee]

Well, you haven't been around much. Or him for that matter. The reason I say this is that you are in the right. You can't date somebody's ex unless they are ok with it.

It's out of respect. I wouldn't want my friends dating somebody I broke up with, for at least a few months or maybe never.

Watch the first season of Rescue me. They explain it pretty well.

 

[sky14kemea]

Well you see, the problem you have here is that you dont seem to realise how much I love my xbox!

But seriously, it is just something EVERYONE goes through. I am not saying it was meaningless, I NEVER said that. I said it wasnt "love", because it wasnt.

*raises hand* I never went through that.
F'nar.
No really, I've never felt like I was in love xD I'm not that niave.

__
OT: Slap him with a herring. No really, I know I'm female, but there's gotta be like a 2 month minimum grace period before you ask out someone's ex, y'know?

 

[SirDeadly]

She's not super hot but she is the nicest person I know. I went out with her for a year and I know that it was something real, not "how I love my xbox".

I am not accusing you of having the hots for a cartoon woman so lets just cut back with the "something real" stuff, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.

You can only measure the level of your feelings against how much you have felt prior to that... for example, you get kicked in the nuts... a terrible pain indeed... but you havent exactly been shot in the face.

EDIT: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

"She is the nicest person you know"... Okay, lets see how events unfold and then see how quickly that changes to "She is a heartless b*tch". Honestly, if your friend does end up dating her are you just going to blame it all on him?

Even after all this I still can't call her a *****. I know it's not entirely because of him if they get together but I will still hate him for it.

 

[MirrorSweep]

If you need our advice on whether on not to be angry..whats the point?

 

[Kinguendo]

She's not super hot but she is the nicest person I know. I went out with her for a year and I know that it was something real, not "how I love my xbox".

I am not accusing you of having the hots for a cartoon woman so lets just cut back with the "something real" stuff, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.

You can only measure the level of your feelings against how much you have felt prior to that... for example, you get kicked in the nuts... a terrible pain indeed... but you havent exactly been shot in the face.

EDIT: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

"She is the nicest person you know"... Okay, lets see how events unfold and then see how quickly that changes to "She is a heartless b*tch". Honestly, if your friend does end up dating her are you just going to blame it all on him?

Even after all this I still can't call her a *****. I know it's not entirely because of him if they get together but I will still hate him for it.

And here we have the "double standard" in all its glory, an illusion so thick not even the purest of light can pierce its gloomy mists.

 

[magnuslion]

at your age, you will love and most likely lose several more times. If there is no chance of reconciliation between you and your ex, decide if unrequited love is worth the friendship.

But honestly, if you do not care enough about him to want him to be happy, then you are not his friend. and if you do not care enough about her to want her to be happy with someone else, you dont love her. examine what you think you mean by these terms.

 

[SirDeadly]

If you need our advice on whether on not to be angry..whats the point?

Oh I'm angry alright, I just wanted your opinion if he was doing the wrong thing or not.

 

[tthor]

depends. who broke up with who?
if you broke up with her, then your friend has every right to date her, since you forfieted your possible feelings for her by breaking up with her.

if she broke up with you, then its probably not good, atleast without your consent

if it was mutual, then it might be ok after a few weeks after you guys broke up

 

[Kinguendo]

Well you see, the problem you have here is that you dont seem to realise how much I love my xbox!

But seriously, it is just something EVERYONE goes through. I am not saying it was meaningless, I NEVER said that. I said it wasnt "love", because it wasnt.

*raises hand* I never went through that.
F'nar.
No really, I've never felt like I was in love xD I'm not that niave.

__
OT: Slap him with a herring. No really, I know I'm female, but there's gotta be like a 2 month minimum grace period before you ask out someone's ex, y'know?

Ah yes, the exception that proves the rule. Thank ye kindly Sky, you see even in not ever being in "love" during your teenage years (which I must remind you that you are still in, so there is still time.) you still view it as naive... thus reinforcing my point. The exception that proves the rule.

 

[SirDeadly]

depends. who broke up with who?
if you broke up with her, then your friend has every right to date her, since you forfieted your possible feelings for her by breaking up with her.

if she broke up with you, then its probably not good, atleast without your consent

if it was mutual, then it might be ok after a few weeks after you guys broke up

She broke up with me coz she wasn't ready for a more meaningful relationship/

 

[FluffyNeurosis]

Its a total dick move for him to go after her that soon and you have a right to be angry but don't get too mad and lose your bro over a ho.

 

[blank0000]

we waited a respectable 3 weeks. Your anger is understandable, but try to be a little more understanding, what if you where him?

 

[crudus]

you have to give concent first but i think man law allows it

Nay, man law requires it as quoted "Before dating a buddy?s 'ex', you are required to ask his permission and he in return is required to grant it."

The law doesn't take note of timing but his was terrible. To be fair, he did ask and probably waited as long as he thought necessary (hint: he should have waited longer). Also, he had to weigh "time to heal" and "let's not wait longer if she is interested in someone else".

 

[ERadical]

Ahhh the same rule applies for mates ex's as it does their sisters, remember that. He's just being a cock

 

[XJ-0461]

3 weeks? Too soon in my opinion. When the girl I wanted to date broke up with someone, I waited a couple of months before I asked her out.

 

[Jharry5]

Three weeks is way too short a time to wait to ask a friend's ex out, in my opinion. The grace period should be a few months at least...
You've got every reason to feel pissed off mate, what this guy's done sounds pretty out of line to me.

 

[Snotnarok]

This is the easiest way to lose a friend besides lending them money. Well good luck

 

[Turing]

It's just a girl. At least he asked you first. Let him have his turn, its not as if you have some magic claim over your ex.
You can always make him feel guilty about it and use that to your advantage