Poll: Poll: is the word "rape" okay to use?

[Bruin]

I couldn't care less about what interjection a Mountain-Dew hyped nerd spews out over Ventrilo.

Seriously.

I couldn't care any less about it.

It doesn't matter what we should or shouldn't say, it's what we want to say. What we want to say hurts peoples' feelings sometimes.

That's a shame, firstly, that people take such things so seriously. It probably stems from actually having contact with a rape in some way or form. Which is still a shame.

But, your unfortunate event does not bar others from using the word rape. Shall I no longer use duct-tape because somebody was suffocated with it once in a movie?

No. I love duct tape.

Yes, but imagine you are walking down the street with a person who has been sexually assaulted and you guy are just talking away happily and you walk past a bunch of kids who say really stupid things about raping each other and the person you're with just starts crying because it reminds them of a horrible experience, people who say it doesn't matter are usually not the people the matter has affected, I suppose we cannot really understand how a sexually assault victim feels about it but it would be my guess that they would prefer you to not use the word anywhere near them. This is similar to the N word, when you use it you bring up unnecessary pain to a person,you instigate them and you're bringing up things everyone want's to forget and put behind them.

P.S. This is probably highly controversial but does having free speech make everything SO much better? What would seriously be the problem if you didn't have free speech and were not allowed to say really extreme words like c*n* and other specific ones I would not like to mention.

I've knew a girl throughout school who was raped as a girl.

If anything, it made her stronger and colder.

But that's besides the point:

Sad things happen in life.

Rape is one of them.

You won't change people by saying "You shouldn't say that!" and then bleed your heart out all over them, they'll just laugh at you and use it more. Especially the target age group you're talking about.

However, the word "******" is a racial slur, used to promote hatred and racial intolerance towards blacks. Hatred and racial intolerance that was promoted for decades, through generations up until the present day, some would argue.

It's entirely different than the word "rape", first of all, in the sense that "rape" is not meant as insult. They mean they physically dominated their opponent somehow or another, and like children and people in general do; they will usually exaggerate and tie it into a sexual reference of some kind. "Rape" isn't meant to inspire intolerance, fear or terror, and it's not used as a slur of any kind.

I'd say if you went up to a girl who'd just got raped and started screaming in her face "You just got RAPED! RAPED! RAPE! RAPE!" that you pretty much deserve to be punched in the testicles, but it's not as if the boys in your scenario did it specifically to target her.


And to your "P.S.": That's an incredibly sheltered view of the world and speech as a whole. I don't think you realize that free speech is something that people have fought and died for, that people still die for and that without it, you risk tyranny and oppression slipping into your everyday life. Just because somebody says something that is unpleasant doesn't mean they shouldn't be able to say it. If you omit words from our vocabulary that are controversial, you risk putting people into a world wherein nobody fights, nobody has conflicting opinions because nobody has opinions to believe in and rally behind.

Under that pretense, I refuse to stop using words I want to use out of some moral, bleeding-heart standpoint that it may hurt somebody's feelings.

 

[Kevonovitch]

honestly? never, not unless it's used in a buisness manor, ie police investigating a murder, need the rape kit, ect.

frankly, only being alive 22 years, and every single woman, girl, and teen i know, from the age 14 up, has either been raped once, or had an attempt to atleast twice, and i hear the same types of #'s from friends from all over, NO, it's not something to be thrown around like dead baby jokes.

 

[Nicarus]

Rape can mean different things in context, but if it seems wrong to use it just use a different saying like pwned.

Rape is even used for something completely innocent. I've heard of seeds used in foods that are harvested from whole fields of rape...flowers. I ain't kidding.

 

[demoman_chaos]

If it offends somebody, so be it. I won't stop saying something because it hurts someone's feelings. Everything offends somebody, so should be ban language all together?

What offends one, may not offend everyone. Just because 1 is offended doesn't mean everyone is. There are people who are afraid of balloons, does that mean we should ban balloons?

Being offended is just a part of life. If someone wants to be offended, they will find a way so let them be offended all they want and continue on life. Once they see no one cares that they are offended, they will stop being offended and all will be well. If colored folks weren't offended by people saying ******, I bet the racist idiots would stop saying it (just like grade school bullies, they only want attention and for people to react to them, ignore them and they will be demoralized and have to find a new target to belittle to make themselves feel better).

So in short, if you are offended by something get over it. Being offended is just another part of life.

 

[SimuLord]

I can't count the number of women I've known who have been rape victims without taking off my shoes, so I tend not to take the word "rape" lightly.

I prefer the word "broomsticked" for all my implied sexual-violation needs.

 

[Turbo_Destructor]

I guess it is kind of coarse, and could be a pretty sensitive issue for some. I would reserve using it for when you're with friends who you know won't take offence to it (probs ask them first)

 

[Plurralbles]

Nope.. I dont' give a damn about some word. It's a word.

Of course, I rape at not being a ******.

"Problem" words in this context:
Rape: Dominate
******: Someone with a weak mind.

 

[Flying-Emu]

It's a word.

A word.

God damn.

So you would openly go around spewing out words such as:

"I raped you!"
"******!"
"N*****!"

And other such words? No. You would never say such a word mainly because these words can be devastating to the wrong people. Not only could you be arrested for saying "rape" and having others misunderstand it, you could also lose your job, be thought of your peers as an asshole, never get a girlfriend/boyfriend and other such problems will continue to occur.

Stop trying to be "cool" and grow up.

How about you stop trying to be a condescending prick?

Really. It's a word. I was verbally abused for my entire life, and I've come out fairly alright. If people get up in arms over a word, they have too much time on their hands and aren't spending time on things that actually matter. You know, like being deathly afraid of the fact that Christine O'Donnell, a woman who knows nothing about Constitutional law, actually has a shot at winning a seat in congress. Or worrying about global hunger, or gang violence, or things that actually matter.

I don't waste my time worrying about whether or not people will be offended by words because there are bigger problems in the world that deserve my attention.

Does that mean that I use those words constantly? Hell no. I'm a writer; I have plenty of ways to say that I kicked your ass into the floor besides rape. I'll still use it if I feel it's the proper word. And nuts to people who would have a problem with that; it's a word, and I'll tell them that.

Something tells me that you're the person who thinks it is A-OK for an African man to go around calling everyone he sees a ******. Take your politically-correct bullshit somewhere else; I'll be over here, NOT siphoning my speech for fear of offending someone.

I recognize that words CAN hurt people, and if someone genuinely has a problem with it, all they need to do is POLITELY ask me to stop, and I'll gladly comply. Because I'm not an asshole.

 

[Extra-Ordinary]

Oh man, I can't go a day without hearing it either. It's actually getting more annoying than offensive. I don't say it. Mainly because it really is NOT a word to be used casually. Whenever I hear it, I actually try to get them to stop in a rather subtle. Whenever I hear the word for whatever reason, "I raped this kid on Halo" or what have you, I say: "You did? How? I don't remember there being a button for that." I know it's not a very effective way of trying, but if I just blantently say stop, they'll probably start saying it twice as much just to piss me off.

 

[Lineoutt]

Honestly: In describing something like "There was a rape in my town today, but the cops caught the guy", then yes.
It should never, EVER be used casually, or even as something positive. Because it's never a good thing.
There's no such thing as consensual rape after all.

Consensual rape = sex. xP

OT: I believe in context. If someone were to be raped and you went up to them and said "***** got raped" then you deserve to die in in stinky, underbelly of hell. But if some dickwad is using it over live then whatever. Its all about context, like many have said before.

Look, you cant spend your whole life trying not to offend people because its gonna happen. As long as your not a dick about it then go ahead and say whatever the motherfuckery you wish. But yeah I do my best to avoid saying rape in public and i am comfortable saying it around my friends so i just say it when im with them.

 

[s0m3th1ng]

I wouldn't say it to my little sister...but I'm pretty sure most adults know about this little thing called CONTEXT.

Jesus Christ...no matter the word or phrase, ANYTHING can be offensive given the right context.

Being offended by something is as much the offendee's fault as it is the originator's.

This, although I dare you to make "fishy" or "innocent fluffy puppy" or even "ceiling" offensive.

DOUBLE DOG DARE?
Your vagina smells fishy.
Yeah, I'd rape that innocent fluffy puppy.
Some Muslims want to build a mosque beneath your ceiling.

 

[s0m3th1ng]

motherfuckery

I'm stealing this word.

 

[lacktheknack]

Some Muslims want to build a mosque beneath your ceiling.

I don't think that worked.

 

[Lineoutt]

Some Muslims want to build a mosque beneath your ceiling.

I don't think that worked.

Your mom didn't work when I ceiling'd her last night.

...boom chakalaka

 

[CrystalShadow]

Um, no. I don't think it's that big a deal.

Now I'm sure some people have been severely traumatised by actual rape...

(And I think I was technically raped last week... I have some sense of how traumatic it can be even when it's not all-out violent assault.)

But still, I don't go around worrying about someone using the word in such a different context.

Wait a minute...first off, let's establish one thing: Are you okay?
Second, do you need an angry mob for anything?
Third: No, seriously, a few of us are imaginative when it comes to torture.
Fourth: So, you're okay, right?

Yeah, really. I'm fine.
I mean, I was a bit messed up for about two days.

But like I said, it's one of those technicalities that's very difficult to really wrap your head around.
Like, you've sort of agreed to something but what ends up happening crosses a line that you wouldn't actually have agreed to if you had known it was going to happen in advance.

I guess I'm a little conflicted about it because I know he would have stopped sooner if I'd actually let him know he was doing something I hadn't agreed to.

Eh. The more I think about it the more confusing it gets.

Hoo, boy...um...damn. You know what? I blame the sexualized media. Also, society. I'm going to stop right now before I start calling for the extermination of the entire human race.

So, them's the risks with casual encounters. Call me old fashioned, but I don't do casual encounters. The closest I've ever come to a casual encounter is posting bad erotic fan fiction, and that's just an entirely different can of worms.

I only have the regular spiel: Don't hesitate to stay "STOP" if you feel uncomfortable. Only engage in activities that require a safety word with someone you trust. Being on all fours is the most vulnerable position you can place yourself in. At least if you're facing each other you can do a quick palm strike through his chin. (I say "through" because you have to imagine penetrating past his chin and into his nasal cavity in order for the strike to be effective.)

But yeah...in all seriousness, make sure you trust the guy before you place yourself in a vulnerable situation.

That's... Yeah. Well a combination of inexperience and just a general difficultly asserting myself makes me prone to going along with things far more than I should.

This was a repeated series of mistakes from the moment I first met him. My first inclination was to avoid him altogether, but somehow I usually can't bring myself to be harsh enough with people.

From there, it went downhill, because the next thing he did should have been an obvious warning sign too.

In any event, all I can make out of it is that I need to be tougher about it and listen to my instincts as opposed to those little doubting voices that say it'll be alright...

Right now I seem to be attracting obsessive stalker-type people too, so I really have had to start being quite forceful about keeping people away...

I guess some things can only be learnt the hard way unfortunately.

 

[lacktheknack]

Some Muslims want to build a mosque beneath your ceiling.

I don't think that worked.

Your mom didn't work when I ceiling'd her last night.

...boom chakalaka

Ooooooohh... I'd give you a cookie if I didn't want to remove your still beating heart right now.

 

[Paksenarrion]

Um, no. I don't think it's that big a deal.

Now I'm sure some people have been severely traumatised by actual rape...

(And I think I was technically raped last week... I have some sense of how traumatic it can be even when it's not all-out violent assault.)

But still, I don't go around worrying about someone using the word in such a different context.

Wait a minute...first off, let's establish one thing: Are you okay?
Second, do you need an angry mob for anything?
Third: No, seriously, a few of us are imaginative when it comes to torture.
Fourth: So, you're okay, right?

Yeah, really. I'm fine.
I mean, I was a bit messed up for about two days.

But like I said, it's one of those technicalities that's very difficult to really wrap your head around.
Like, you've sort of agreed to something but what ends up happening crosses a line that you wouldn't actually have agreed to if you had known it was going to happen in advance.

I guess I'm a little conflicted about it because I know he would have stopped sooner if I'd actually let him know he was doing something I hadn't agreed to.

Eh. The more I think about it the more confusing it gets.

Hoo, boy...um...damn. You know what? I blame the sexualized media. Also, society. I'm going to stop right now before I start calling for the extermination of the entire human race.

So, them's the risks with casual encounters. Call me old fashioned, but I don't do casual encounters. The closest I've ever come to a casual encounter is posting bad erotic fan fiction, and that's just an entirely different can of worms.

I only have the regular spiel: Don't hesitate to stay "STOP" if you feel uncomfortable. Only engage in activities that require a safety word with someone you trust. Being on all fours is the most vulnerable position you can place yourself in. At least if you're facing each other you can do a quick palm strike through his chin. (I say "through" because you have to imagine penetrating past his chin and into his nasal cavity in order for the strike to be effective.)

But yeah...in all seriousness, make sure you trust the guy before you place yourself in a vulnerable situation.

That's... Yeah. Well a combination of inexperience and just a general difficultly asserting myself makes me prone to going along with things far more than I should.

This was a repeated series of mistakes from the moment I first met him. My first inclination was to avoid him altogether, but somehow I usually can't bring myself to be harsh enough with people.

From there, it went downhill, because the next thing he did should have been an obvious warning sign too.

In any event, all I can make out of it is that I need to be tougher about it and listen to my instincts as opposed to those little doubting voices that say it'll be alright...

Right now I seem to be attracting obsessive stalker-type people too, so I really have had to start being quite forceful about keeping people away...

I guess some things can only be learnt the hard way unfortunately.

I don't want you to take this negatively, but you make me worry about you. Ok, time for practical coping strategies:

First, find and reinforce a safe place. Make sure it's physically safe (i.e., you can lock the door and be near a public area and feel safe). Have or find friends that will house or protect you. Make sure you trust them.

Second, take up self-defense. I've taken this mantra to heart: "Save a person once, and they'll live for that day. Teach them how to incapacitate and maim an opponent, and they'll live for a lifetime."

Third, if you can't avoid this person, set ground rules immediately. Make sure he knows you're serious. Do NOT let him turn you into his plaything. You have to mentally prepare yourself to use force if you feel threatened or uncomfortable.

You do not have to learn things the hard way. We do not have to live in fear. We should not be expected to live in fear. If you fear, you MUST turn it into HATE. They have forced our hand, and we must NOT let them control us.

Do not listen to the fear. It tells us that if only we behave properly, the bad stuff will be over soon. We start making excuses for them. We accept what is done to us in order to keep the peace.

Peace is a Lie. There is only Passion. (His lust. Your hate.)
Through Passion, I gain Strength. (His lust motivates and encourages him. You must let your hate do the same. Let it protect you. Let hate act as your shield.)
Through Strength, I gain Power. (He has gained power over you, through your fear. Use that fear to power your hate.)
Through Power, I gain Victory. (Right now, he's winning. You are helpless. He has made you believe that you can do nothing to stop him. He has taken advantage of your politeness, of your civility. Remember, he is working with the same set of rules. You must voice your fears to friends and family; tell them how you feel uncomfortable. That way, you have recourse for action, and a ready defense in case he tries to turn your actions against you.)
Through Victory, my Chains are Broken. (He has imprisoned you in his own personal world, on his terms. You must Break him to Break Free.)

 

[Admiral Stukov]

-snip-

I'm in awe over the fact that you just turned the sith code into a valid argument.

 

[Paksenarrion]

-snip-

I'm in awe over the fact that you just turned the sith code into a valid argument.

The Sith Code: It's not just a lifestyle choice, it's a Way of Life. And Death. Mostly Death. For your Enemies.

^_^