Poll: Preferences of asking people out

[Midnight Crossroads]

I disagree. Being hurt initially is the easy part. It's dealing with the under lying implications that ruin the friendships. That's the poison. I cut my losses earlier. If the relationships don't work with friends, I'll try to fix things, but if that doesn't work, it's over. I expect the same respect and effort out of relationship I put in it. If the other person doesn't return the same, then that says a lot of their value of me and what we have.

If there can still be a friendship, it will come after the old one is gone.

Anyway, I'm just going to agree to disagree if that's alright with you. This has probably been one of the better conversations I've had on this site. Thank-you.

Buh... But you pretty much said the same things I said now x_o
Being hurt by rejection is the easy part because you got the answer you wanted no matter if it was good or bad and can move on.
Not sure what you mean with these underlying implications though.. It takes two to keep a friendship alive, of course that's obvious. If only one wants to retain the friendship while the other one does nothing to keep it alive, then it will wither away with time.

You're welcome.
I'm sad to hear that you've had some bad experiances here but not suprised.

Well, for one it's been civil instead of a passive aggressive hissing match, it wasn't about a subject which makes me groan, and you actually seemed to think about your posts.

By underlying implications, I mean just what someone rejecting you means. Especially when it's by a person you value. Questions of your own judgment and worth, and of just what the person you care about thinks of you. It colors how you interact with your friend

 

[CarpathianMuffin]

I only ask people out once I know them well. Their personalities make or break it for me, and I've made the mistake of asking somebody out who I got annoyed with once I actually got to know them quite a few times.
I'm quite happy with my current relationship for a change, which is pretty steady and healthy as a result of getting to know her first.

 

[Doclector]

Never. I can only fail, and such failure is a risk to my sanity, which is a risk to efficiency, which is a risk to the goals I actually can achieve in life.

 

[Kortney]

I never will try to ask anyone out - ever again!

I hate it.

 

[Panorama]

I've gone out on dates with people I've barely known. I'm usually too much of a chickenshit to do the actual asking though.

Probably This

 

[Cat of Doom]

I dont so much ask girls out, as go to the pub/club, buy a drink for/dance with a resonable attractive, alredy slightly tipsy girl, and hope for a happy ending. yeah I know right =(

 

[Hader]

I never will try to ask anyone out - ever again!

I hate it.

Aww why such a party pooper?

Nevermind it, I have experience in these things

 

[dslatch]

I'd never ask out a close friend, but if it is a bit more distanced girl then yes I'm planning on it tomorrow actually.

dumb question: For the poll I'm in Canada Should I hit American Answer or United Kingdom one?

 

[FinalHeart95]

I want to have at least had a conversation with the girl.
Other than that, bring it.

 

[Dirty Hipsters]

I usually ask girls on a date out of the blue. If I see a cute girl, I talk to her and ask her out, this has the dual effect of both catching them by surprise and making them decide on the spur of the moment, and making you seem more confident. I try not to make friends with people first since that can make the asking out process a lot more awkward if they think of you as a friend. Also, knowing very little about each other makes first dates that much more interesting.

 

[badgersprite]

I like to sort of make friends with someone, like know them enough beforehand that I know their sense of humour and know a bit about them, but not actually be a friend by the time we go out or ask each other out.

Like I have to have met someone a couple of times in a social setting before we go on a date, but not be 100% familiar with them to the point that I've friend-zoned them already.