Poll: Thinking of Leaving My GF of Three Years

[Cormitt]

Honestly.. do what you like but if you "decide" to move on (and it pretty much reads like you have) then be a man and end it before you do anything else. Took me a while to learn that lesson and it was a painful process.

 

[slippereend]

Kinda had the same situation myself a bit more than a year ago, except for the bisexual stuff.
I was 19, was with my BF for three years, and I just wasn't that interested anymore. He went to school somewhere else, so I didn't saw him that much either, and I fell for a guy in my class. (college/university btw)

I told my ex how I felt, we broke up, and I started 'dating' the other fellow. It was quite slow paced, though we did wound up to have sex after 12 days. =p
My friends didn't approve of it at first. But hey, it was my choice, and I don't regret it one bit. I've been a whole lot happier with the new guy than with the old one
Also, my exBF has a new GF and is very happy as well.

so I say, go for it

 

[Jandau]

TLDR: Excitement and Challenge, or Comfort and Security? Help me Escapists, you're my only hope.

No wrong answer here. Well, except cheating, that just makes you a douchebag.

Seriously, regardless of what anyone tells you, there is no right or wrong choice in this situation, only choices and consequences. However, I can tell you a few things for certain.

1. The "new girl" is 99% likely a case of "grass is greener" and anything you do with her will likely result in her own flaws ubbling to the surface.

2. Whatever choice you make, you'll regret it. If you stay with your current GF, you'll wonder what might have been. If you dump her and go for the new girl, you'll end up remembering those 3 years as great and wish you stayed with her. If you drop both of them, you'll be regretting missing out on all the sex you could be having with one of them.

3. In the end, nobody in this thread can give you good advice since they lack the crucial piece of info - YOU! I don't know you, I don't know what kind of person you are. If I did, maybe I could offer some advice, maybe one of those options would fit you slightly better than the others. This is the reason you should be making up your own mind and not asking anonymous trolls on an internet forum for advice. Or at the very least, talk to your friends, people who know you well and can offer more informed advice.

That's what I've got, hope it helped.

 

[WaderiAAA]

I guess the only ones who can solve this problem is random strangers on a gaming forum?

For what it is worth, it seems your relationship is broken due to two facts:
A) You and your girlfriend don't see your relationship in the same way.
B) You are spending way too much time together. Having the same job, the same classes and on top dating is just too much. You need some time away for each other throughout a day just for variation.

If you do leave her for the other girl, just make sure to learn from those mistakes.

 

[FallenTraveler]

I say pick Katherine, definitely Katherine, the other one is probably a succubus or something...

but seriously bro, you want to pick an 18 year old? You're having pretty regular SEX with your girlfriend... are you nuts? 18 year olds are ridiculously stupid!

 

[bojac6]

(I'm 21, if it helps)

That should have been your TLDR. You're 21, you've got most of your life ahead of you and you're obviously sick of your girlfriend. Meet new people, date new people, try out new things. There is no reason to stick in a relationship where you're bored of the other person, especially at the age of 21.

 

[Concealed]

So, here's the deal: I'm sick of my woman.

She pouts whenever I take alone time or leave her to see my friends.

Oh dear god end it now. Seriously, this sort of thing doesn't go away and the longer you have to deal with it the more you will start to resent her for taking away your individuality. Besides, it sounds like you've already made up your mind and just made this topic to get confirmation of your choice. So trust yourself and end it. You'll be much happier

 

[GigaHz]

Why does the rest of the world need to know about this?

Seriously.

I expect a detailed paragraph outlining your reasons for subjecting the internet to your personal life.

 

[Concealed]

Why does the rest of the world need to know about this?

Seriously.

I expect a detailed paragraph outlining your reasons for subjecting the internet to your personal life.

If you so strongly don't care why did you click the topic? Sometimes it helps to bounce ideas and situations off people who don't know you, never will know you, and whose opinions of you matter even less than normal.

 

[Harley Duke]

You ever played Catherine?

Damn! Beat me to it.

 

[GigaHz]

If you so strongly don't care why did you click the topic? Sometimes it helps to bounce ideas and situations off people who don't know you, never will know you, and whose opinions of you matter even less than normal.

Curiosity mostly.

Fair enough, you do have a point. I just believe that he should have come to the conclusion that if either one has a thought of straying, the relationship is over or near over. He could have done it on his own, probably.

 

[mandaforever]

So, here's the deal: I'm sick of my woman.

We've been dating for three years, nonstop. We go to college together and tend to always take classes with her. She's alright-looking, and she plays games and cosplays and such rather continuously and adequately. We tend to agree on many issues of morality, life, and love, though she's a bit interested in children and marriage, which concerns me. Our sex life is, to put it bluntly, great, even though I have long ago lost interest.

Things between us are by no means BAD. But they also aren't perfect. We bicker incessantly due to our shared trait of stubbornness, and she is overly harsh and judgmental of my activities (hardcore gaming, drinking) and she pouts whenever I take alone time or leave her to see my friends. She's also very critical of my father and sister, people who are flawed but not worthy of the heaps of derision poured upon them.

We also have many portions of our lives intertwined, e.g., we both share an hourly job and our families are quite fond of each other.

There's also a fly in the ointment. I'm falling for another woman as well. This new girl is three years younger than myself. (I'm 21, if it helps) and we are both very into each other. I've kept a bit of distance between me and this new girl, but I find it harder and harder to avoid. This new woman appears to have the qualities I like that my current girlfriend lacks: intellectual curiosity, passion, and a challenging mindset. She's the excitement and challenge my relationship lacks. Also, my current gf is a 6 and the new one is easily an 8.

TLDR: Excitement and Challenge, or Comfort and Security? Help me Escapists, you're my only hope.

I'm torn. On the one hand, it sounds like you're already pretty much done with this relationship and like the other girl at least presents some potential. On the other hand, this post makes you seem like a tremendous douche and I'm sort of loath to suggest that you burden any woman with your presence.

^^^ a thousand times this.

 

[BloatedGuppy]

So, here's the deal: I'm sick of my woman.

We've been dating for three years, nonstop. We go to college together and tend to always take classes with her. She's alright-looking, and she plays games and cosplays and such rather continuously and adequately. We tend to agree on many issues of morality, life, and love, though she's a bit interested in children and marriage, which concerns me. Our sex life is, to put it bluntly, great, even though I have long ago lost interest.

Things between us are by no means BAD. But they also aren't perfect. We bicker incessantly due to our shared trait of stubbornness, and she is overly harsh and judgmental of my activities (hardcore gaming, drinking) and she pouts whenever I take alone time or leave her to see my friends. She's also very critical of my father and sister, people who are flawed but not worthy of the heaps of derision poured upon them.

We also have many portions of our lives intertwined, e.g., we both share an hourly job and our families are quite fond of each other.

There's also a fly in the ointment. I'm falling for another woman as well. This new girl is three years younger than myself. (I'm 21, if it helps) and we are both very into each other. I've kept a bit of distance between me and this new girl, but I find it harder and harder to avoid. This new woman appears to have the qualities I like that my current girlfriend lacks: intellectual curiosity, passion, and a challenging mindset. She's the excitement and challenge my relationship lacks. Also, my current gf is a 6 and the new one is easily an 8.

TLDR: Excitement and Challenge, or Comfort and Security? Help me Escapists, you're my only hope.

I'm torn. On the one hand, it sounds like you're already pretty much done with this relationship and like the other girl at least presents some potential. On the other hand, this post makes you seem like a tremendous douche and I'm sort of loath to suggest that you burden any woman with your presence.

^^^ a thousand times this.

100,000 times this. Release both of those poor girls from your clutches and spend a few years growing the fuck up before inflicting a relationship on anyone else.

 

[Girl With One Eye]

Wheres the option to vote that you don't deserve either woman and the way you rate your girlfriend is shallow and disgusting?

 

[Mr.Pandah]

So, here's the deal: I'm sick of my woman.

We've been dating for three years, nonstop. We go to college together and tend to always take classes with her. She's alright-looking, and she plays games and cosplays and such rather continuously and adequately. We tend to agree on many issues of morality, life, and love, though she's a bit interested in children and marriage, which concerns me. Our sex life is, to put it bluntly, great, even though I have long ago lost interest.

Things between us are by no means BAD. But they also aren't perfect. We bicker incessantly due to our shared trait of stubbornness, and she is overly harsh and judgmental of my activities (hardcore gaming, drinking) and she pouts whenever I take alone time or leave her to see my friends. She's also very critical of my father and sister, people who are flawed but not worthy of the heaps of derision poured upon them.

We also have many portions of our lives intertwined, e.g., we both share an hourly job and our families are quite fond of each other.

There's also a fly in the ointment. I'm falling for another woman as well. This new girl is three years younger than myself. (I'm 21, if it helps) and we are both very into each other. I've kept a bit of distance between me and this new girl, but I find it harder and harder to avoid. This new woman appears to have the qualities I like that my current girlfriend lacks: intellectual curiosity, passion, and a challenging mindset. She's the excitement and challenge my relationship lacks. Also, my current gf is a 6 and the new one is easily an 8.

TLDR: Excitement and Challenge, or Comfort and Security? Help me Escapists, you're my only hope.

I'm torn. On the one hand, it sounds like you're already pretty much done with this relationship and like the other girl at least presents some potential. On the other hand, this post makes you seem like a tremendous douche and I'm sort of loath to suggest that you burden any woman with your presence.

He is a tremendous douche for being real about how he feels, how his girl treats people that are important to him, and the stagnation of his relationship? You are going to need to qualify this statement, because right now you are the only one that looks like a douche to me.

^^I wouldn't go as far as saying he looks like a douche now, just that he doesn't seem to understand relationships at all.

In my honest opinion, Break it off with your current girl. You're young, you need to see more of the world, and she'll only hold you back it seems. You need to meet other new people, new women, new guys, go to new places, just get out of this comfort zone now while you still can. You don't want to be stuck in a relationship in which you don't even want to be in. It doesn't make any sense.

My girlfriend of 3 years cheated on me the day that I told her I think we needed to "take a break". She cried and cried on my shoulder and went and hooked up with a guy that she knew for about 8 years (5 years longer than me obviously). I didn't feel anything left in the relationship, so it was simply for the best.

um sorry to be a dick, but how can you cheat on somebody if your taking a break, thats the whole point of the "break", which itself is a flawed idea anyway. You brought that on yourself

You're not being a dick, you just don't know all the details of what happened. I somewhat paraphrased my situation just so I didn't have to go through it all. In essence though, she cheated on me.

 

[drummond13]

Honestly, your reasons seem like pretty shallow ones. If your relationship isn't working for you, then end it, sure, but it shouldn't be because the new girl is an "8". That kind of crap is what gives us males a bad name. That's a reason to hit on a different girl at a bar, not a reason to end a long term relationship. I know you have other reasons as well, but you hit on the attractiveness portion at least twice in your post. This is not a good sign.

It seems to me like even if you did break up and then try to hook up with this 18 year old you'd get sick of her pretty fast. You always see just the good qualities at first, and even the bad ones seem cute because they're novel. The grass is always greener. If you want to break up, then break up, but it should be based purely on your current relationship, not because of this new teenager you've met.