Poll: Who would win a war between tea leaves and coffee beans?

[Cheesebob]

Tea > Coffee

One reason.

No matter how big and strong a coffee bean is, as every general knows:

Outnumbering > small but elite

 

[yeah_so_no]

Coffee. All the coffee beans have to do is jump up and down on the tea leaves, crumbling them to bits. Coffee beans would just laugh is the tea leaves did a similar attempt.

Spoken by someone who has obviously never had matcha [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matcha], where part of the process is pulverizing the leaves. This makes for a brew that laughs in the face of your pathetic coffee.

So yes. Tea all the way.

 

[Sixties Spidey]

Coffee Beans, but still. This is a versus thread, so I sense mods locking this thread VERY soon.

 

[A Raging Emo]

Tea Leaves.

 

[cobra_ky]

the tea leaves could read themselves to predict the future, then use that knowledge to crush the coffee beans.

 

[Guestowel]

I think it would be an epic battle, I think Tea has a larger fighting force. But Coffee's forces are stronger and more focused. Neither of their armies are prepared for Beer, who is in the north waiting for an opportune moment when Coffee and Tea's numbers have been decimated.

 

[Iron Mal]

I believe that the victor would be neither...as we know they are both inanimate objects so they would just lay there with malicious intent until we come along and make fine beverages out of them, humanity wins, again (let's go for the dolphins next...actually, what about baby seals?).

 

[Simalacrum]

tea. Especially it was in the 1990's - then the Empire would obliterate coffee.

 

[DazZ.]

Tea is far too sophisticated to worry about petty squabblings. Well sit here dunking and laugh at your feeble attempts, then when your energys worn out and your crashing, well walk outside, look at the damage and hand you a bill.

 

[Zacharine]

Tea > Coffee

No matter how big and strong a coffee bean is, as every general knows:

Outnumbering > small but elite

Thanks for the laughs for today!

I mean, you're not actually serious, now are you.

If you are, read about the Winter War between Finland and Russia. Check the numbers for casualties.

Then ponder for a moment the military strategy behind every modern western nation: High-tech, well equipped well trained troops fighting a mobile warfare. Not numerical superiority...

So yeah, good one, mate.

 

[LaughingTarget]

You don't understand. Coffee is far more caffeinated than tea, which would make it hyper and uncontrollable. It would be on a permanent berserker rush, making tea, which tries to be all "proper" and stuff, useless in a battle. Coffee would simply overwhelm tea in such a war via the sheer brutality. Tea's only hope is if it can hide long enough for coffee to crash.

 

[Lexodus]

Tea. By miles.

We didn't have that empire for nothing...

 

[Zacharine]

Spoken by someone who has obviously never had matcha [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matcha], where part of the process is pulverizing the leaves. This makes for a brew that laughs in the face of your pathetic coffee.

So yes. Tea all the way.

Funny, coffee is still coffee no matter how small you grind it.

And the coffee beans have special forces at their disposal: Instant Coffee, Black. Small buggery b**t**ds with a penetrating taste and always ready for action.

It takes a well-trained taste-bud to survive that I tell you.

 

[razer17]

deffinitely the tea leaves. coffee beans are smaller.
lets compare to rock paper scissors.
coffee bean = rock. leaf = paper. paper/tealeaf wraps around rock/coffee bean and wins.

 

[DigitalSushi]

both are great for drinks, alcohol mixes well with both " depending on what your mixing with".. both make great exfoliating soap, as well as other countless uses.. so it really would end up a stalemate.

exfoliating soap?, is this what the war has come too?

War, war never changes... but it does take a break, to moisturize.
I like coffee, because i'm worth it.

Speaking of beauty products, a really hot girl walked past my shop today, she looked like she just stepped out of a Loreal advert, she had that "bounce" in her step and the huge arm swing you only ever see in commercials for hair care products.

 

[Mr0llivand3r]

i love the Chinese! and then their 2 billion-strong army invade us in a few years time, I hope they'll remember that i said that.

so tea leaves would win

 

[Chimpzy_v1legacy]

I choose the invisible option 3.

Combining them in some way to create the ultimate flavour/poison, one so strong it will be undrinkable to all but me.

 

[the1ultimate]

Using all my paper-scissors-rock experience I have concluded that the Tea leaves would wrap the Coffee beans and thus win.

And tea tastes better anyway.

 

[Evertw]

Tea.

The true stereotypical British drink.

 

[AkJay]

Coffee, it is stronger.