Poll: Why I don't like Elves

[Skeleon]

Vulcans are elves in space. They're emotionless, self-important, long lived, and they have better technology they keep from humans.

Okay, I've got to respond to this right away.
No. Vulcans are not emotionless.
In fact, they are a lot more emotional than humans.
But they work all their adolescent lives on controlling their eruptive tempers (pardon the pun).
Some of them are arrogant, true, but most of the ones shown on the various Star Trek shows actually develop. Not just Spock (who's Half-Vulcan), but also Tuvok (and others, I'm sure). He actually establishes a friendship with the loud, overly emotional Neelix (whom I don't like much, either, but for very different reasons).
According to First Contact, the Vulcans were also the first aliens to contact humanity and help them become a space-faring race. In that specific respect, they're more like the Dwarves from fantasy literature who help the primitive humans build homes from stone and forge metal tools.
Eldar on the other hand are Elves in space. And I don't like them. Heh.

*snip*

Hmm, maybe, but I can't really empathise with something I don't identify with at all.
Anyway, I was talking about Tolkien and Tolkien-esque Elves. The Warcraft Elves were meant as a counterpoint to show that it's not just Elves themselves but what specific Elve-archetypes stand for.
Also, note my post about War of the Flowers.
It's not that I'm against the concept of Elves in general, it's that I don't like the most common, stagnant variant. And I fail to feel pity for them when they know they are failing but still won't try to adapt for some arbitrary reason.

 

[ThrobbingEgo]

Vulcans are elves in space. They're emotionless, self-important, long lived, and they have better technology they keep from humans.

Okay, I've got to respond to this right away.
No. Vulcans are not emotionless.
In fact, they are a lot more emotional than humans.
But they work all their adolescent lives on controlling their eruptive tempers (pardon the pun).
Some of them are arrogant, true, but most of the ones shown on the various Star Trek shows actually develop. Not just Spock (who's Half-Vulcan), but also Tuvok (and others, I'm sure). He actually establishes a friendship with the loud, overly emotional Neelix (whom I don't like much, either, but for very different reasons).
According to First Contact, the Vulcans were also the first aliens to contact humanity and help them become a space-faring race. In that specific respect, they're more like the Dwarves from fantasy literature who help the primitive humans build homes from stone and forge metal tools.

Yes, I know Vulcans aren't emotionless per se. Have you considered that maybe you just don't like how elves are handled by fantasy writers?

 

[Skeleon]

Have you considered that maybe you just don't like how elves are handled by fantasy writers?

Yeah, you're right about that.
Unorthodox use of Elves (I'll again point to War of the Flowers and the examples about Terry Pratchett's variant) can be very enjoyable. As long as actual character development is involved.

However, it seems that this specifically generic way of handling the Elves is also the most common.
It's pretty much omnipresent.
Can't I have a little dislike towards the Elves for that? :,-(

 

[Bigsmith]

I understand your point about elfs. I'm not hear to try and get you to think anyother way. My Favoirte race is Dwarf, humans are genraly boring... cause you no, I am one. And tbh I am short, and have long hair, I have a thing for metal armor and medievil weaponry. I would love to live in an underground house. And when playing a dwarf in any factasy game its realy easy to recreate my self.

Tieflings from DnD 4ed are probably my second favorite race, they are demons banished from the Demonic planes... or at least my one was.

Elfs are kinda up there own ass, I mean if you read the War of the ancients triolgy you find out the Night elfs (from wow) won't acept the help from anyother race (touren and Dwarfs being the only ones alive at the time, and the high elfs live with the night elfs) becuase they believe they are the superior race and think that the other races will just destory order within the ranks of whats left of the army dispite its the first coming of the buring legion, although they are kinda winning where i am in the book.

 

[Khazoth]

Ironicly, I once made an elf in City of Heroes, just to try and make an elf that I didn't absolutely hate.


I ended up with a cyberpunk alchoholic with a katana.

 

[NeutralDrow]

Why do I hate elves?


Because they are represent everything that I loath about modern society.


1) They are effeminate. Now, there's nothing wrong with being effeminate, but you can basically describe EVERY ELF EVER MADE with the lines "slim, beautiful, pointy ears." This is terrible. I am a big fan of testosterone and in backlash to the waves of emos and idiots around me, I have begun to associate manliness as better.

Elves are not manly. Elves are whiny emos. Most of the time they are all about the poets, even. Seriously, the elves are one MySpace away from being being beaten to extinction by a massive tidal wave of firey trolls.

Spoiler: Bring 'em on!

2) They represent objectification of women. Amusingly enough, see all that "testosterone is good rawr" talk I just gave? I'm not even a total hypocrite, because I believe firmly that a strong woman is just automatically flat-out better. I'm not meaning physically, either.

But think about it, when you see pictures of elves they are wearing less than anything. The men are women and the women have dimensions similar to 10 foot poles. This facepalming sexism makes me shake my head and build more elf drowning chambers in Dwarf Fortress.

How is that limited to elves?

Spoiler: Though I'm also firmly anti-fanservice in that regard

 

[Skeleon]

I ended up with a cyberpunk alchoholic with a katana.

That'd be a likeable character, no matter what!

 

[NeutralDrow]

Ironicly, I once made an elf in City of Heroes, just to try and make an elf that I didn't absolutely hate.


I ended up with a cyberpunk alchoholic with a katana.

I wound up with a explosion-happy gadget nerd with a modern, laser-sighted composite bow. Archery/Devices for the win; can't wait to get the elven time bomb and the elven gun drone.

 

[antipunt]

female elves = yay

male elves = WAT

 

[Dr.Sean]

guys wait wasnt this therad done before.

 

[bjj hero]

Maybe you dislike Elves because of Will Ferrell?

Spoiler

Say what you want about elf but when he first gets to America and tries to talk to the racoon I laughed so hard I cried.

 

[KaiusCormere]

Quite honestly, dwarves and elves are kinda badly done in many cases. I think of Elves as potentially cool, but usually boring.

Specifically, JRR Tolkien's Elves are a fairly boring remnant of their former glory (the Siege of Angband, Fall of Gondolin, Feanor) - now they sit in Rivendell and Lorien and Mirkwood and sing and drink wine and mope about the Sea. It fits his storyline well, but ultimately it doesn't make them likable as a race.

Other interpretations of Elves often suck. Sometimes their pretty cool. But mostly, I wonder at WHY elves, and dwarves, and other typical fantasy conventions are used at all. Why not make something wholly original, and wholly your own?

 

[ExodusinFlames]

Very good points. And your prayers will be answered soon.

 

[Zykon TheLich]

I have to say I have found pretty much any incarnation of elves to be inherently unlikeable.
I suppose I could go on a hate spewing rant about the poncy, oh so beautiful and perfect, pointy eared Mary Sue motherfuckers, but I won't, because it would probably just end up as me spewing hate at people who like elves, as in really like, you know, the people who play as elves in WoW, dress up as elves and probably draw elf porn to boot, in fact the type of people who voted for your first option ( I kid, I kid...unless you draw elf porn)

Thinking about it, a lot of the time they just come across as pretty humans with pointy ears, or pretty humans with pointy ears and 1337 skillz. Why bother. Maybe if they were more different physically...

 

[NeutralDrow]

I have to say I have found pretty much any incarnation of elves to be inherently unlikeable.
I suppose I could go on a hate spewing rant about the poncy, oh so beautiful and perfect, pointy eared Mary Sue motherfuckers, but I won't, because it would probably just end up as me spewing hate at people who like elves, as in really like, you know, the people who play as elves in WoW, dress up as elves and probably draw elf porn to boot, in fact the type of people who voted for your first option ( I kid, I kid...unless you draw elf porn)

Ah. I figured you held back a hate spewing rant because you wouldn't be describing any form of elf outside of fanfiction and the Inheritance Trilogy.

 

[Zykon TheLich]

Ah. I figured you held back a hate spewing rant because you wouldn't be describing any form of elf outside of fanfiction and the Inheritance Trilogy.

Well yes, that's pretty much the same thing isn't it? For the real reasons I don't like elves read the first sentence & the edit.

 

[Motti]

Ah. I figured you held back a hate spewing rant because you wouldn't be describing any form of elf outside of fanfiction and the Inheritance Trilogy.

I actually liked some of the elves in the inheritance trilogy. They're slightly more characterized than usual, like that blacksmith woman who has a bloodyminded insistence not to use magic and the swords(elf?) who's a complete tool until he gets owned badly. There's also the dark elves in Morrowind, who drink, shoot, stab and throw fireballs with wild abandon at the N'wa. Apart from that, most elves suck.

 

[Gooble]

Evles just prance about looking pretty and shooting enemies from long distance with bows.