Relationship Dilemma - FINAL UPDATE. IF YOU POSTED HERE BEFORE, PLEASE VIEW MY LATEST POST

[Julianking93]

Thanks to everyone for your helpful responses. I put the original post in Spoilers for people who haven't read this yet who might be able to help.

[spoiler/]Recently, I've started talking to a girl whom I've grown quite fond of. We met on a chat room about a week ago and have been talking ever since almost daily.

Now, I know what you're thinking, "Julian! How could you? I expected better from you. You met her on the internet! She's probably a guy!"

To that I say, first off let me finish Mr. Mcshitface and second, there is absolutely no possible way that she's a guy. A guy wouldn't put this much effort for this long on just a prank. Besides, I've talked to her on the phone and we've met in person. (it was a local chat room)

Anyway, after talking to her for a while, I've grown quite a liking to her. She's almost the exact thing I was dreaming of when I thought of a perfect girlfriend. She's into videogames, she likes the same music as I do, she reads manga, she's sweet and she's Japanese/American (I like Asian women). She's actually one of the nicest girls I've ever met in my life.

The other day, things got sort of serious when she told me she liked me. A lot. I could tell the sincerity in her voice. And that's what made it so much harder when I discovered her one, tiny little difference from me in the form of this text. After talking to her, I said something (I can't remember) followed by "Oh my God" to which she replied:

[spoiler/]"Could you do me a favor. Please say Gosh instead of God. I mean...you aren't really talking to God."[/spoiler]

God. Fucking. Damnit.

That's right Escapist. Through several other questions and by her responses, I learned that this seemingly perfect girl is a bible thumping, Obama hating, gay bashing, Evangelical Christian. Her beliefs go exactly the opposite of mine and now I don't know what to do.

She really is one of the sweetest and most compassionate girls I've ever met, but to hear all this just is crazy to me (but I guess there's always a catch).

I don't know what to do. She goes against all my own personal morals and beliefs yet I have a soft spot for her. It also doesn't help that she told me I'm the first guy she's ever had feelings for and that she thinks she's falling for me.

What should I do?

If you feel the need to, PM me about the situation.[/spoiler]

Now, UPDATE - I'm freaking the fuck out right now. I thought I just might be able to make this work out between us despite our differences, yet something just happened that makes me want to drop her from my life completely. Note, that I've only been in one relationship before and that this may be normal but I honestly don't think it is.

This girl is batshit crazy over me.

I never thought it would be possible. After all my wishing for a girl to love me and for me to love, I get the craziest one of all.

Last night, I was at my father's house. Its in an isolated area outside of town and I don't get any cell phone service. No big deal, but when I came back this morning, my phone got 6, count them, 6 text messages, 4 missed phone calls and 1 message from, you guessed it, this girl.

This may be normal to an extent, but not for me. I was only out of contact with her for 13 hours, yet she's got messages everywhere asking where I am.

I even have Yahoo Messenger, AIM and iMac chat, and all of those are riddled with messages from her asking where I am and why I haven't called her. She's fucking nuts.

Now I [i/]really[/i] don't know what to do. We live in the same town. She knows my name. She knows my face. And she's completely bonkers over me and I never felt the same about her.

What do I do?

 

[iJosh]

Tell her that you like her too and hope for the best.
Obviously you shouldn't be asking a gaming forum about help with girls. That's like asking a bunch of suspiciously looking virgins about sex.

 

[Nwabudike Morgan]

What should I do?

Move on. This isn't going to work.

 

[Vet2501]

I agree, she may seem perfect now but somewhere down the line you'll inevitably make a slip (not a slight on you personally it's just human nature) and that will be the end.

If you don't agree with her moral veiws then it's probably not worth it.

There are other girls out there, don't be disheartend just because one turns out to be a bit of a nutter.

 

[Agent Larkin]

Go for it. You just have to accept that she is religous.

 

[Vrex360]

I say that while your beliefs are quite different, you shouldn't just run away. Give it time and give it a chance, she may well come to your way of seeing the world and things might in turn change. You just never know. I mean from the positive atributes you've desribed she can't be all bad, she's probably capable of developing an open mind... give her a chance.
That said certainly don't force your opinions on her.

 

[Pimppeter2]

Hit it and quit it

 

[Nepeccel]

Just get with her, who cares about her religious views? Those can be changed with time!

 

[Mr.Black]

Deal with it. No one is perfect. There's probably something equally annoying about you that she hates, but she likes you enough to endure it. If it becomes too big of a problem down the track, then end it. Can't hurt to see where things go. Just don't hate her for being religious.

 

[Megas Rules]

tell her what your beliefs are and see if shell accept you with them and try to accept her beliefs. if it seems to fall apart and cant talki about important things because of it, then id think it wouldn't work out

 

[DannyBoy451]

Recently, I've started talking to a girl whom I've grown quite fond of. We met on a chat room about a week ago and have been talking ever since almost daily.

Now, I know what you're thinking, "Julian! How could you? I expected better from you. You met her on the internet! She's probably a guy!"

To that I say, first off let me finish Mr. Mcshitface and second, there is absolutely no possible way that she's a guy. A guy wouldn't put this much effort for this long on just a prank. Besides, I've talked to her on the phone and we've met in person. (it was a local chat room)

Anyway, after talking to her for a while, I've grown quite a liking to her. She's almost the exact thing I was dreaming of when I thought of a perfect girlfriend. She's into videogames, she likes the same music as I do, she reads manga, she's sweet and she's Japanese/American (I like Asian women). She's actually one of the nicest girls I've ever met in my life.

The other day, things got sort of serious when she told me she liked me. A lot. I could tell the sincerity in her voice. And that's what made it so much harder when I discovered her one, tiny little difference from me in the form of this text. After talking to her, I said something (I can't remember) followed by "Oh my God" to which she replied:

[spoiler/]"Could you do me a favor. Please say Gosh instead of God. I mean...you aren't really talking to God."[/spoiler]

God. Fucking. Damnit.

That's right Escapist. Through several other questions and by her responses, I learned that this seemingly perfect girl is a bible thumping, Obama hating, gay bashing, Evangelical Christian. Her beliefs go exactly the opposite of mine and now I don't know what to do.

She really is one of the sweetest and most compassionate girls I've ever met, but to hear all this just is crazy to me (but I guess there's always a catch).

I don't know what to do. She goes against all my own personal morals and beliefs yet I have a soft spot for her. It also doesn't help that she told me I'm the first guy she's ever had feelings for and that she thinks she's falling for me.

What should I do?

If you don't feel that you can deal with her beliefs, then just don't persue the relationship any further.

If you do, however, then enjoy never getting so much as a handjob for the next few years.

 

[dmase]

Well if it took that long to start talking about your differing political views so on and so forth then it could work. I mean if she's getting invited the republican national christmas party or is whipping her self with a studded belt for god's forgivness then maybe you should back off from that one(or just help with the whipping). As much as that is an ultimate let down let it go she obviously isn't that crazy she likes videogames after all.

 

[Trivun]

I find that when I try and muscle by the whole 'religious/political' discrepancy, it just comes back later and ends any relationship that might happen.

I'd leave it, it'll just cause you trouble in the end.

You must not let yourself be blinded by love.

Agreed. You'll find someone else, OP, and so will she. You're better off ending things now in a romantic sense, though I guess if it isn't awkward you two can always continue as friends. I have friends who have different beliefs to me and different political stances to me, for example one of my housemates is a diehard Labour supporter while I'm a Tory. He's still a really close friend. But if I met a seemingly perfect girl who I liked a lot, then found she was a homophobic racist bigot or something, then I definitely wouldn't want to start a relationship with her. You're better off just movng on, OP. It's not worth the hassle.

 

[Julianking93]

tell her what your beliefs are and see if shell accept you with them and try to accept her beliefs. if it seems to fall apart and cant talki about important things because of it, then id think it wouldn't work out

That's the biggest problem. I [i/]have[/i] told her my beliefs. When she said that text about the Oh my God thing, she said after, "I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't have said anything. You don't like me as much anymore do you?"

Truth be told, I didn't. I told her that I'm an atheist and her only reply was "why?" to which I told her why but then she just said "can we not talk about this anymore?"

If I can't talk to her about deep spiritual things like that, how can this work?

 

[Mr.Black]

Just don't hate her for being religious.

I don't think it's so much that he hates her beliefs, rather that he knows that neither of them will change, and this will lead to problems down the line.

Which I think it will, by the way.

You're probably right, but there's no use going at it with that attitude. I am religious and we're not all nutcases that are narrow-minded (albeit, so many are). But in saying that, if she's going to be all weird about saying the Lord's name in vain, then I fear there may be no hope, haha.

@OP: What does she think about you not being religious?

EDIT -

tell her what your beliefs are and see if shell accept you with them and try to accept her beliefs. if it seems to fall apart and cant talki about important things because of it, then id think it wouldn't work out

That's the biggest problem. I [i/]have[/i] told her my beliefs. When she said that text about the Oh my God thing, she said after, "I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't have said anything. You don't like me as much anymore do you?"

Truth be told, I didn't. I told her that I'm an atheist and her only reply was "why?" to which I told her why but then she just said "can we not talk about this anymore?"

If I can't talk to her about deep spiritual things like that, how can this work?

So be upfront with her. If you feel you can't talk about spiritual things with her then say so. Tell her what you want. If she's going to be a disty daisy about it even after you've thrown a lifeline, then it's not worth it.

 

[Julianking93]

Just get with her, who cares about her religious views? Those can be changed with time!

Oh believe me, I've tried, and it don't work.

Just don't hate her for being religious.

I don't think it's so much that he hates her beliefs, rather that he knows that neither of them will change, and this will lead to problems down the line.

Which I think it will, by the way.

Ninja'd me on my own thread!

Yes, that's exactly what I think. She wants a serious relationship (at least I think. I interpret "I'm falling in love with you" as either wanting a serious relationship or craziness)

But I honestly don't think I could have a loving relationship with an extremist like her. I mean, I like her a lot and I even thought I was falling for her (for a moment at least) but knowing her religious and political bias, I don't know if I can.