REPORT: Archon in distress over which wing to choose for The Escapist

[Shanahanapp]

"Are you left wing or right wing?"

"I am a bird." *flies away*


This is my position on all types of politics.

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

Using my vast Defy Media resources, I hired an expert panel of poultry experts, PR managers, and social media gurus. They have advised me that I should avoid chicken wings due to their potentially partisan sideness.

Going forward I will strictly purchase and consume chicken breast.

You filthy wingist!

I'm sure you will get nasty letters from the spicy honey mustard and chipotle representatives.

God, I swear BBQ just ruins everything!

Why always chickens eh? Never a goddamn rooster!

But nobody thinks about that...

One day our grandchildren will look back in bewilderment and disdain on these days whilst munching on rooster legs.

Dude, roosters are just assholes.

I'm sorry, but they really don't deserve to be eaten. Maybe if they did something over than help make more chickens and chase people for no reason then maybe, just maybe, we can kill and deep fry them.

 

[FalloutJack]

There has been way too many questionable attempts at satire on this board recently.

I think I'm going to make a Top 8 List of the worst offenders.

Do I get any points for cynical snarkery?

 

[Zen Bard]

A bird needs two wings to fly.

Just sayin...

What if one is broken?

Then that bird must take...that broken wing...and learn to fly again and learn to live so free.

 

[Dirty Hipsters]

Using my vast Defy Media resources, I hired an expert panel of poultry experts, PR managers, and social media gurus. They have advised me that I should avoid chicken wings due to their potentially partisan sideness.

Going forward I will strictly purchase and consume chicken breast.

So what you're saying is that you prefer the white meat, and that it is superior to the working man's dark meat?

Archon is racist and classist confirmed.

#darkmeatmatters

 

[Bizzaro Stormy]

I have the strangest desire to dig out my copy of the classic war movie Wings, and rewatch it.

You could also have a marathon viewing of the sitcom "Wings"!

Or you could listen to a playlist of Paul McCartney and Wings.

Or I could reread Wings of Mourning. But that one is pretty sad so I probably shouldn't.