Roleplaying Quotes

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Crowghast

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Aug 29, 2008
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Me(The DM): The King is atop a tower that is a thousand feet tall, calling down to the plaza below where the city's people are gathering. He shouts: "To save money for the royal coffers, we are going to ship you all off as slaves."

Player: That's not cool.

Me: Too bad. "Guards! Accost these people to be shipped off!"

Player: I want to shoot him. (He's armed with an off-hand crossbow.)

Me: You can't do that.

Player: Sure I can.

Me: That's fucking impossible.

Player: (Makes roll anyway, roll is extremely successful)

Me: The bolt flies all one-thousand feet with perfect accuracy and with no detriment to it's damage from the height and wind velocity, striking the King directly in his heart. He tumbles down and splatters on the plaza.

Player: Awesome. I loot his body.

Player2: Ha, lol.

They were subsequently murdered by the guards. We started over afterwards.
 

elfninja

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May 25, 2009
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During the character creation of a new 4e D&D game, where all players are starting at level 1.

Deva Invoker: So since i am from the Astral Sea, i can have starweave armour.
GM (me): If you can buy it with your starting 100gp gold (heavy incredulity)
Deva Invoker: well it doesnt give a price...

Note: Starweave armour is a +6 enhancement bonus, making it a level 26 magic item minimum.