Yeah, I also hate gender roles. Hearing people say things like "*gender* is so immature/shallow/petty/etc. or "Oh, that's to be expected because this person is male/female/homosexual/transgendered" makes my skin crawl (though that last one you don't hear so much in spite of the extreme amount of prejudiced and hatred against transgendered people; perhaps because a lot of people don't treat them as though they have basic human rights)
Having thought about this subject quite a lot, I now think that a part of the reason I was confused about my sexuality towards my late-teen years (I thought I might be bisexual) was because I just didn't identify with what everyone defines as a "man". I'm a fairly shy, intellectual person who's pretty terrible at sports and don't follow them on TV, I listen almost exclusively to classical music and am currently studying music history and theory, etc. I got along with all the other men, but I didn't relate to a lot of them. Parts of my demeanour could be called a bit effeminate. I'll favor discussion over action a lot of the time. The list goes on.
It seems silly now, because I wasn't really attracted to other men. But I most certainly didn't identify to the depiction of "ideal men" as they're shown, and these men are almost always 100% heterosexual. I figured that, if I didn't fit into that mold, then maybe I wasn't purely heterosexual either. I identified to a lot of intelligent women I knew, a lot more than I did with those men. And I'm not repulsed by gay men kissing, or even having sex, because I don't see any non-consensual sexuality as disgusting, regardless of who is involved (well, maybe except the kind of sex play that involves bodily waste of torture, but that's for a different reason). I'm also extremely curious about sex, and this curiosity sometimes goes past the boundaries that define "purely heterosexual" sex (if that makes any sense to others...) What I did find repulsive was sex and women as it was too often depicted in pornography (and indeed, more mainstream media).
By now I've completely rejected the stupid, superficial societal norms that supposedly define men and women. I'm quite happy to be who I am, which includes being a heterosexual man. I just wish people would stop trying to fit each gender into stupidly restrictive definitions. (and for the sake of all that's good, PLEASE stop falling back on "biological proofs" of these gender roles, because 1. they're basically all conjecture and 2. nature is a whole lot more varied than people make it out to be; quite a few species have a radically male/female dynamic than the one we've assimilated as "true").
Edit, because this was posted after I finished my tl;dr :
TheDarkEricDraven said:
The worst part about being male is also wanting to be female and having to explain to people what "bigender" or "androgyne" means.
So I went and checked up what bigender meant, and while I don't identify with that, it reminded me that for much of my life I really wanted to know what it was like to be a woman, to be in a female body. I don't think this is anything else than acute curiosity in my case, but I think it contributed to my confusion. And yet, I'm not 100% entirely sure, either, because this has at times felt like more than just "curiosity"... But ultimately, this doesn't bother me much, so I don't think it's anything like being bigender or transgender. But it does make me wonder who else might have felt like I did (and occasionally still do).
