Should I file a sexual harassment claim?

[Lucifron]

LISTEN, why should I have to confront her and talk about it first? It's not fair that I get put in such a embarrassing and awkward situation, because I have done nothing wrong.

I mean, a family friend in his 60s was fired from his six-figure job for patting a female male clerk on the thigh, and she never asked him to stop. Why should I, as a male, have to act differently?

That was the most childish thing I have ever heard. Grow a pair and tell her to stop, or better yet, if she's hot, indulge her.

 

[Zaik]

If it was me, I'd go with it, video tape doing it, send it to her husband, then tell her supervisor that she offered you some sort of work-related benefit for sleeping with her, then show him the video. Then get a restraining order on her.

That's just me though. You could go with the sexual harassment thing, you'd be a bit more likely to keep your job and not have to slap her probably wimp husband down when he "comes after you". But really, don't act like you're all angry over "being treated like a sexual object". That's incredibly womanly and I would think you were just putting on a huge show to try to get someone you didn't like fired.

 

[Valksy]

I started a part-time job at a state agency about four weeks ago, and there is a married woman in her early 50s who works there who is not my direct superior, but is still above me. She appears tired and sulky most of the time, but whenever she sees me she brightens up immediately. She acts flirty every time she talks to me and often gives me compliments on what I am wearing that day. She has grabbed my biceps at least twice before and asked whether I work out.

Yesterday I got a buzzcut, and today at work she unexpectedly came up from behind me when I was seated and ran her hands all over my head and commented how I look like the guy from Prison Break.

Now it's very possible she is being an innocent flirt because she is bored at work and means nothing by it, but I am going to choose to feel violated and offended instead. I am not a sexual object, and I demand to be taken seriously at my job!

Should I file a claim and potentially ruin this woman's long career and marriage?

I believe you should if it does bother you that much. However, you could tell your superior first, just to see if a more work oriented talk can solve the issue. If it persists beuyond that though, I would seriously consider filing a claim.

Its a troll hun. Anyone who didn't get the memo that this is for the lulz of the OP to make a facile point and wasted their time should be justifiably annoyed.

 

[Corpse XxX]

Tap that ass!

thats all i have to say.. Older, experienced women can be magic if you catch my drift..

 

[MrAkuma201]

Ask her if she is into you if not... tell her to stop and if she dose not... then I don't know

 

[SIXVI06-M]

LISTEN, why should I have to confront her and talk about it first? It's not fair that I get put in such a embarrassing and awkward situation, because I have done nothing wrong.

I mean, a family friend in his 60s was fired from his six-figure job for patting a female male clerk on the thigh, and she never asked him to stop. Why should I, as a male, have to act differently?

Wait wait wait, let me get this straight - you think it's too much of a hassle to just TALK to her considering you SEE her everyday and LESS of a hassle to do something a LOT more confrontational like suing her for sexual harassment? You know you'll probably need legal representation? you'll probably have to do a fair bit of paperwork, you'll put a black mark against the company you work with, you're going to make enemies, oh - and if you're worried about having to "confront her and talk to her about it" how is "standing up in court in front of everyone you know, your employer and anyone else- and testifying in front of them" any better? and to top it all off - if they rule in her favor... You. Are. Fucked (for lack of evidence, people feel more sympathy for her, etc).

For someone who's doing this much scheming... where's your brain, man? If you're just being petty, seriously- stop, you're making a show of yourself.

You're a guy - yeah, unfortunately- the world sees genders differently, and that can't be helped; try being the good guy and sort matters out without resorting to 'Suetopia' (what I LOVE calling America). If she persists, then, sure- you have EVERY GOOD and NOBLE reason to sue her. If you're just going to sue at the drop of a bat (or at the bat of an eye- teehee) - then I don't care what you say about being judged differently, but I'd have to say you're being a bit of a sue-happy pussy.

This whole thing you posed is utter rubbish and makes no sense, make up a better scenario next time.

 

[Mr Thin]

snip after reading whole thread

Wow, this is great.

To be honest, I think your use of gender reversal to highlight a double standard was a bit ham-fisted, but I still believed your first post - I just thought you were an asshole.

But, unlike 99% of the thread, I read past that, and slapped myself for not picking up on the sarcasm.

I think the more important lesson to be learned from this thread is not that there are double standards in society and the workplace, but that NOBODY on The Escapist reads past the OP. Even if they claim to (as several people in this thread have done, when they clearly haven't).

 

[BonsaiK]

The whole point of this thread was supposed to be to indirectly point out a sexist double standard.

This is the correct response.

Except that there is no double-standard.

When someone of any gender sexually harasses someone else of any gender, the correct first action is always to tell them to stop the sexual harrassment (either directly yourself, or through a third party if you really feel that intimidated that you feel you can't approach them and say it). It's only when this request is refused that you should take it further. If you or anybody of either gender reports sexual harassment to any authority the first thing they will ask you is "have you notified the other person, or have they been notified by someone on your behalf, that their behaviour is unwelcome?". If the answer is "no" then they will say "notify them and then let us know if the problem continues". If you go down the legal route without doing this, you won't have a leg to stand on, the other party will always win. Works the same for either gender. No double standard, really. I know it's not very "edgy Internet nihilist" of me to claim that sexual equality does in fact exist in this type of scenario, but in fact it does. Sorry to be a party-pooper.

 

[silasbufu]

Well you're not going to ruin anything for her by saying she touched your biceps and complimented your hair-cut, be sure of that.
Take action if you really want to, but I think there are bigger problems out there than someone enjoying talking to you.

Also, this can answer can be used for the double-standard sarcasm thing as well.

 

[Dieter Meyer]

Some girls are like that, all touchy. Its cute, but uncomfortable sometimes.

there is a married woman in her early 50s who works there

in her early 50s

50s

Dude no... That is NOT cute

OT: You should certainly not file a sexual harassment claim. I wouldnt even call her behavior sexual.

Just tell her that you find her way of acting towards you to be unpleasing and it makes you uncomfortable.

Problem solved.

 

[Lonan]

So don't become like those American douches who throw the toys out of the pram and bawl whenever they have difficulty in life.

why is it that someone always says something so fucking ignorant like this, for NO reason?

Well, it seems relevant, and it seems to be what the OP is doing. And if you're so offended by people saying negative things about that country, why don't you list it as you're country on your profile?

 

[Unesh52]

This is the correct response. Thank you. Apparently most people fail to read past the OP in their rush to hit the reply button and furiously type out their indignation. As one other savvy poster in this thread said, sometimes you can put "THIS IS SATIRE" on the bottom of the OP and people will still miss it.

The Escapist is particularly fun to do this with because there are so many uppity, highly-opinionated people here. I was highly amused and pleased at the success of my thread and the conversation about double-standards that I intended it to provoke; I had fully expected it to die after two pages at most.

I'd say something about how there are another group of people replying to this thread that are accusing you of trolling because they completely missed the fact that it's a valid topic about which there are legitimately divided views and that the OP was supposed to be transparent, but I think if my head were any more inflated with hot air I'd float away like the world's most smug weather balloon...

 

[Vykrel]

So don't become like those American douches who throw the toys out of the pram and bawl whenever they have difficulty in life.

why is it that someone always says something so fucking ignorant like this, for NO reason?

Well, it seems relevant, and it seems to be what the OP is doing. And if you're so offended by people saying negative things about that country, why don't you list it as you're country on your profile?

dude, its any country. the way i see it, people that stereotype and show hate towards an entire group of people are just ignorant dipshits... people that do the same thing to an entire nation are ignorant dipshits that THINK theyre smart.

 

[nick_knack]

Tap that?

 

[Murais]

Take pictures of you naked in the trunk of her car. Make sure they find their way to the local authorities/human resources department.

 

[Brawndo]

So close to 10,000 views..... hnnnnnngghhhhh