So some woman are afraid of me because of my job....

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Phasmal

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Jun 10, 2011
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SilentJay22 said:
Guffe said:
SilentJay22 said:
Guffe said:
SilentJay22 said:
Metal heads? As in people who listen to metal?
Yeah, but mainly the really HC metal fans which wear all dark leather with long black hair, piercings etc.
I mean I look like a pretty young nice guy but when I tell people I listen to metal they get all kidns of ideas about me and immediatelly take a little distance.
I understand that. People where I live are more used to metal, and a lot of people even listen to it as well, but there are still those people that can't understand how I listen to it. I also get plenty of "You do!? You don't look like you listen to it."
Yeah, and you'd wonder since I live in Finland which is kind of "home of metal" and that shit (discrimination) excists here also.
I don't want to know how people get treated in areas were metal is more uncommon.
I don't like to think it's that bad, because I don't treat people who listen to music I don't like badly or unfairly. But then again, people can be people. The only thing I really have to go on is the Heavy Metal in Baghdad documentary.
I was into metal when I was a teenager, but I was also into bright colours.
So when I walked up to my friends with their peircings and dyed hair and black clothes in my pink clothes, people looked horrified, like "They're going to KILL that girl!"
 

Minjoltr

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Aug 6, 2008
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I do tend to avoid building sites and workmen, partly because I don't want to get in the way and partly because I have had unwanted comments yelled at me from scaffolding. A few bad apples spoil the bunch, most people don't do it but when it happens, it's intimidating and embarrassing. Although I've had similar things from strangers in the street, in the park, at the bus stop, out of passing cars etc so I don't know what it is about workmen particularly which is off-putting.

That said, I'm a social noob. Being addressed out-of-the-blue by strangers in either positive or negative terms makes me uncomfortable. I like to go where I'm going, keep my head down, don't make eye contact, conduct my business and leave, trying to attract as little attention as possible. I imagine that builders and other tradesmen are used to working with people they don't know a lot so I could see a friendly nature and inclination to strike up a conversation with strangers being beneficial to this and, due to my unease and inability to deal with this, I read any comments, eye contact, smiles etc. as threatening rather than amicable.
 

triggrhappy94

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Apr 24, 2010
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To quote an old commercial for the documentry series "Gangland",
"It's one thing if the respect you, but when they fear you that's when you have them."
Or something to that effect.

From what I read (I read about half, it was alittle long), it seems like you shouldn't worry. Some people really like the tradesman look with the carpenter's hands. Some people can be intimadated by the whole contruction thing.
 

Chemical Alia

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Feb 1, 2011
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When I see a workman, I see someone who is doing their job. I don't know how that can be seen as intimidating, but I come from a place with a lot of blue-collar workers and my dad is a contractor/carpenter, so I'm used to seeing people who are dressed like that.
 

Psykoma

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Nov 29, 2010
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When I was going to university and when looking for a job post university, I lived near a big construction site. I'd have to walk past it 4-6 times per day, and I would usually avoid the construction workers if they came out, or avoid the construction site entirely. The reason is that when I did see the door open and some workers coming out, a large puff of dust and dirt would come out with them, and I don't want to be all dirty at school (or even worse, at a job interview). That's pretty much it.

But in terms of safety, as soon as 8-9 pm rolls around, even earlier on friday/weekend nights, I try to avoid any guy I don't know. Bitter experience there.
 

Bara_no_Hime

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Sep 15, 2010
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Fieldy409 said:
I have seen plenty of women notice me when I am working close to the street or going to get a tool from the van and when they do, they cross the street. Sure some of them were probably planning to do that anyway, but It happens a lot and I can never shake that feeling that they are expecting me to grope them or something.
If I see a construction site, I typically cross the street to avoid things falling on me. I'm not wearing a hard-hat, so... yeah.

Of course, that's typically in the city. Not sure where you work or how dangerous falling objects might be for the women you're talking about.

On the other hand, construction workers have a (very silly and outdated) reputation for cat-calling at women. So those women might be crossing the street to avoid suggestive comments that media have convinced them that construction workers will make.

Which is, of course, very silly. But people are pretty silly.
 

targren

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May 13, 2009
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Phasmal said:
I'm a woman.
You've just made me really paranoid about offending builders.
See, I normally do cross the road, if there is scaffolding. I have this thing about walking under scaffolding, I hate doing it, so I'll cross the street in order to avoid doing it. I hope the people working on those buildings dont think I think they are rapists.
I'm pretty sure deliberately avoiding places where large, heavy objects traveling at near-terminal velocity are likely to compromise the structural integrity of your skull would qualify as a "positive survival trait." :) I'm pretty sure, as folks who make a living in such environs (that's why they wear hard hats, after all), they're aware of this. I don't think you've anything to worry about. ;)

Regnes said:
So some women are afraid of me because of my job. I work at Tim Hortons and sometimes the customers really get on my nerves, one time there were these two really annoying women at the till, so I took a pot of boiling water and poured it all over their faces. As they screamed in horror I ripped their faces off and consumed them before everybody's eyes.

Everybody acts like they're walking on eggshells around me, it's totally discriminating against me, women are afraid of me because of my job.
That's because everyone civilized knows you bake womens' faces before eating, not boil them. What kind of an uncivilized savage are you? I bet you drink red wine with fish, too.
 

JoesshittyOs

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Aug 10, 2011
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I was completely unaware that builders were stereotyped as rapists. I'm really curious as to where that spawned.
 

Gaiseric

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Sep 21, 2008
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I feel ya OP. I did flooring for a while and I got a lot of the same from both men and women. Made for some awkward elevator rides whenever I worked in some office building.
 

Macgyvercas

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Feb 19, 2009
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I cross the street when I see construction. Not because I'm afraid of the people, but because if, Talos forbid, something were to go wrong, I don't want to be in an area where I could be injured.

Maybe some of the women the OP talks about think like that? I don't know.
 

Screamarie

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Mar 16, 2008
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Sporky111 said:
I usually cross the road because I feel like I'm getting in the way if they're going back and forth to their van, like you're saying. I think your sister's friend is just a weird one, I don't think that opinion is one that would be common.

Or maybe they just watch "Holmes on Homes" so they're afraid of you installing plumbing incorrectly.
I LOVE your Scandanavia and the World Avatar! Gotta love Sweden and Aland.

As for the OT, I do like you, I try to make sure I'm very much out of the way. Maybe not going so far as to cross the street but well out of the way.

As for how I feel about builders and labourers is...the same I feel about everyone. Indifferent. I've grown up in a small town in Texas so I see roughnecks, builders, plumbers, and all kind of workers every day. Some of them are mildmannered, others (usually younger ones but of course not all) are total assholes. In the end, they're just people to me.
 

ResonanceSD

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Dec 14, 2009
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imahobbit4062 said:
LooK iTz Jinjo said:
I'm not sure where you're from, but in Australia, pretty much the fastest way to get in a girls pants is to mention you're a "tradie."
Something I will never understand.
Same here. I'm australian and I'll never understand this.
 

Treblaine

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Jul 25, 2008
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Fieldy409 said:
Right so, my job? I'm a carpentry apprentice. I help build houses. Im not a builder, but people who don't know what that means would throw me under that name and I do build houses sometimes. Mostly I do Rennovations...which I hate so much, nothings square and the old walls are filled with spiders and dust.

So, like first off, I notice a massive difference in the way people treat me in my work clothes, people seem...a little afraid of me. I have seen plenty of women notice me when I am working close to the street or going to get a tool from the van and when they do, they cross the street. Sure some of them were probably planning to do that anyway, but It happens a lot and I can never shake that feeling that they are expecting me to grope them or something.

Some of that is likely paranoia. I know for a fact at least one woman thinks that way, my sister told me how her friend actually said to her(not knowing what her brother and father did) that she was always afraid walking past building sites that the builders were going to rape her. She actually said rape, not the stereotypical catcalling or whatever, this person thinks we are rapists!

Im not ugly or scary looking either, women are very friendly to me when Im not in my workclothes. It can be pretty uncanny the difference. I am young and women do find me attractive, I dont have any of the other things people typically assosciate with intimidating like tatoos and piercings.

Theres other things too. People seem to think im tough because of my job and would be good in a fight(Yes my job does keep me fit but strength means nothing when you have zero experience, I havent thrown a real punch since primary school.)

Ill admit, there are some people in my industry that do nothing but drink, fight and think of nothing but fucking in their free time. Yet they are the minority and most of us are actually professionals who just want to do our job. People being afraid of us cant be good for us if people are actually too afraid to hire a contractor to fix their house or whatever.

Im kinda rambling here... So people of the escapist, especially women. What do you think when you see a builder, or a labourer or tradesman of any other job. Am I just being paranoid for the most part?
Oh, so the Diet-Coke-Ad stereotype hasn't stuck:


I think (UK) tradesmen in general might have liked to exude a macho confidence persona, but I think for many it has just come off too strong on some women.

It's my understanding rape-paranoia/phobia is very common amongst women, even if they have never been seriously sexually assaulted as women are increasingly independent to the point where the idea of needing a chaperone is ridiculous, yet their physical weakness in case of any assault is serious. So it isn't really a phobia, but crossing the street is becoming a phobia as it's irrational to fear such an attack in the well-walked street of the day during business hours.

Who knows where the association comes from. Maybe it is JUST the "assertive machismo" that they associate. Either way they probably KNOW it is irrational but still like to indulge their irrational fears by crossing the street or stupidly voicing their "get feeling" without actually bearing thought on the matter.

PS: I feel your pain for renovations. If only it was easier to build new houses than maintain the status quo in this country.
 

Robert Ewing

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Mar 2, 2011
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It can be seen as a very working class job. That does put people off. There is no way to help it, it's just one of those things.
 

Erana

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Feb 28, 2008
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Ympulse said:
Erana said:
No, it is not fair to men to have to deal with women suspecting them of being possible rapists, but rape is too real a threat to not be paranoid.
A vast majority of rape stems from women being retarded (Like getting way too wasted at a bar/club) and not the "Scary man from nowhere stealing you off!"

So no, your excuse is wrong.
You ignorant bastard. You have NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT.
You have no right to make that claim, and talking like that only goes to belittle the very real horror that it can entail.

Come back to me after your friend is violently raped and murdered in her own lab, just minutes away from where your sister is, or people you care about being violated by their own fathers as children, or overpowered and raped on her college campus by a serial rapist, (As in, a sadistic bastard who attacks random women on the street) only to be treated to the "You were asking for it" bullshit you're flaunting about now, undermining her ability to trust and leaving her with a sense of self doubt that she has had to deal with all her life.

I know too many women that I care about on a personal level who have been raped, at absolutely no fault of their own. I have seen it affect them deeply, not matter how resolute they are in moving on and not letting it change their lives. I don't know what your experience is with rape, but its obviously an incredibly shallow and uninformed one.

Shut your mouth, and show a goddamned bit of human compassion.

artanis_neravar said:
Erana said:
Strange man, probably strong from his line of work, knows the place inside and out, has a perfectly legitimate reason to be in the environment handling equipment unfamiliar to the general public?

And that's without the group acts of sexual objectification towards women that comes with the builder stereotype.

No, it is not fair to men to have to deal with women suspecting them of being possible rapists, but rape is too real a threat to not be paranoid.
I'm sorry things are this way, and I'm very sorry that its worse when you're dressed for your job, but please, bear with us women. We don't like it, either.
Sometimes that paranoia goes to far, my friend tried to ask some lady for directions on the street, in broad daylight, and she pepper sprayed him
Well, I think that probably stems from those women not being very sensible people in the first place.
Just because everyone's a potential threat doesn't mean that you should act on it.
 

Asuka Soryu

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Jun 11, 2010
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Well, it's to be expected. People are quick to judge on appearance. Most people will look at the cover of a book and decide on what the book is, without taking the chance to read it.

I kinda like disturbing people. I once went around with green lines running down my cheek, like Ulquiorra. It's hilarious to see peoples responses. I wanna one day walk around in normal places, dressed like Yami Marik. Long purple cape, spiked out hair, gold necklace and arm bracelets, and a rod. xD
 

Arakasi

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Jun 14, 2011
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Stereotyping at it's finest.

Any woman worth your time won't stereotype that way, so don't worry about it.