So there's this girl...

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RhombusHatesYou

Surreal Estate Agent
Mar 21, 2010
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Between There and There.
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The Wide, Brown One.
Woodsey said:
There's countless studies on the "Cock length - Inches or centimetres?" debate and they all say inches. I can assure you of that, and no you don't need to see any sources for such information.
I use microns for engineering precision.
 

Delock

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Mar 4, 2009
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Arawn.Chernobog said:
Try saying Hi...

or killing her parents.

The first option USUALLY works better... usually
Your quote + your avatar = comedy gold

FargoDog said:
RhombusHatesYou said:
FargoDog said:
And you want her dead right? Well I take $340 for my cut, but you'll have to cough up $500 overall for.. Expenses.

Oh wait, you like her and you don't know how to talk to her? Simple. Talk to her how you would any other human being. She isn't a cyborg (and if she is, bonus points), she's just another human being. Go up and start a conversation about work/school and take it from there.
You forgot to add "Remember to wear pants."
No! That's not how you do it! Every guy wears pants. If he wants to stand out from the crowd he needs to go totally naked. Well, perhaps wearing the most feminine slippers he can find.

OP, I assure you: follow this guide and she will notice you.
Remember, if you can't find those slippers, you've got to go the old fashioned way: have war paint over every inch of your body and carry around your family's sword/spear and matching shield. Pratice your war cry because that's need to impress her later on, after you've engaged in a fight to the death with a giant of a man with an eyepatch and a hook for a hand. Trust me, no one will not notice you.
 

StBishop

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Sep 22, 2009
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Woodsey said:
StBishop said:
Woodsey said:
StBishop said:
Woodsey said:
Tell her you measure 7 soft. She'll love it, trust me.
This won't work.

It's rediculous.


Tell her 17 cm. Metric is sexier. :p
Only pansies measure themselves in metric; and Imperial sounds much more manly. Besides, 17 sounds like you're promising more then you could ever hope to deliver.
Not really, if you say 30 cm (~ 1 foot) a person who uses metric will know what you mean instantly as it's the standard length for a ruler. so 17 is a little over half. 17cm ~ 7"

Plus saying that your penis is 25cm is better than 10 inches. 25 is a bigger number. 10's boring.

Metric is also (if you use imperial) foregin and therefore sexy.
I'm English, so we just mix and match the two without any real logic apparently. Still, it's not the number that's important, but the measurement system. And since we always measure ourselves in inches, everyone know what you mean when you say you measure x inches. Centimetres are smaller, so the number that accompanies it is irrelevant.

There's countless studies on the "Cock length - Inches or centimetres?" debate and they all say inches. I can assure you of that, and no you don't need to see any sources for such information.
I think you'll find that wikipedia disagrees with you (as I will change the page if it doesn't).

And you're correct, as soon as one is discussing penis length no respectable sources or references are necissary.

For example, "My penis is the size or 2 cans of coke stacked on top of each other."
"Prove it."
"Nah, I know the truth."
 

Eggsnham

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Apr 29, 2009
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narwhalman218 said:
-Le Snippity-
First off, there's a relationship help thread led by BonsaiK that's still going strong after a while.

Basically, you post and he replies with advice.

Anyways, just a simple "Hello, how are you today?" would get a good conversation going. Assuming you let it keep going.

Also, put life into your words, don't just monotone them out until you're done.
 

StBishop

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Sep 22, 2009
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RhombusHatesYou said:
Woodsey said:
There's countless studies on the "Cock length - Inches or centimetres?" debate and they all say inches. I can assure you of that, and no you don't need to see any sources for such information.
I use microns for engineering precision.
I occasionally use yoctometres for increased accuracy but when I feel like using single digits I use kilometres.

Also, the real playa's don't have restraining orders, they have a body count.

To reiterate the answer to OP, just talk to her, all this talk of penis and death and restraining orders will only scare her. If it doesn't scare her, she should scare you.
 

Edorf

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May 30, 2010
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I guess the only piece of advise I can give to you is to realize that she's just another human being... Just like your best friend who you talk to everyday.
Really, if you just start thinking of her as an equalent to everyone else, and not some kind of godess who has been sent from heaven the conversation will be much smoother and less awkward.
Should awkward silence arise, try to think of a subject fast... It doesnt have to be much, doesnt have to be anything else than "So, how'd the test go?" or "What are you doing today?" (You might want to avoid the second one if all YOU do is play video games.. She'll probably counter ask!)
 

Uber Evil

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Mar 4, 2009
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Irridium said:
Um... I hear talking to her works quite well. Just talk to her like you would anyone else, and ask her to go out.

Failing that, I suggest killing the family and moving to Mexico.
Ignore this man! That doesn't work. (I've tried.)
Yeah talk to her.
Jesus you guys scare me. Roofies? Horse Tranqs? WTF Men.
 

Hangaround

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Jul 8, 2010
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First off: Try to act normal, if you yourself is not normal, don't be yourself. We like stereotypes, play that one out. If she likes a special stereotype (like jocks, bad-boys etc) you can try acting like one; as long as it isn't too far away from your own personality, then it becomes way to noticeable. If you're considered normal you might as well just be whoever you are, maybe train a little to boost your self-esteem.

Love is but a mere chemical reation and with the abstence of it you can just do some drugs. It's helping about half the world already. (no im not being completely serious here, in case someone didn't notice)

There's also kidnaping her and tying her up in your basement, i mean it's bound to work for some time.
 

the December King

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Mar 3, 2010
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RhombusHatesYou said:
Do something that will get her attention and show you're quirky and just a little bit dangerous...


... set yourself on fire.
Romaaaaantic!

Just be yourself, but also let her be herself, if that makes sense. Find out more about her, from her, but also be prepared to examine the different likes and dislikes, as well as your similarities. And don't put her too high on a pedestal. Finding out you're compatible might be hard if you refuse to see her for who she may be.

And no farting near her, too soon! Patience...
 

Dogstile

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Jan 17, 2009
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Dude, its simple. All you have to do is throw fish at her. Its an ancient singapore sign of love. She'll have to fall for you then!