So you like a girl...

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Dark Prophet

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Jun 3, 2009
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There are a lot of recomendations for the face to face option here, but I don't know do most of them really know what it feels like to tell someone you really really like or are even in love with what you feel about them and at the same time having no fucking idea whatsofuckingever if they feel the same way. It is crushingly difficult I can tell you that. That said, you should always find a way to tell them how you feel,just to get it out of your system. I once told a girl I knew had a boyfriend for the same just reason, I didn't leave my name of course but I felt somewhat better afterwards.
 

Aetera

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Jan 19, 2011
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For all of my relationships but one, I've been the one to be asked out. I am HORRIBLE at initiating things. The one girl that I did ask out, we'd been flirting with each other non-stop for weeks, so finally asking her out was an easy next step. We were walking back to our dorm, playfully flirting again, and I just grinned at her and asked if she wanted to go out with me. Simple as that.

But yeah. I'm much more the "flirt and drop hints until she asks me out" type.
 

ChickenZombie

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May 25, 2011
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I've been in the same spot since I was able to "like" a girl. so it's always been the same girl but I did not (and still wont) tell her because, frankly, I know there is no way she would think of me that way. I just use the "dont hate what you have" mindset and I feel fine
 

IzisviAziria

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Nov 9, 2008
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GraveeKing said:
Well first I'd go to a psychiatrist to see why my sexuality has changed.
No but seriously - I'd probably invite her and a couple of her or my own friends out, and drink until I can tell her my feelings, then if I still remember in the morning, I'll make sure I confirm it with her and explain I was too scared to tell otherwise.
the tactic here being..... "hi, I'm a coward. Date me anyway?"

Bet that one works well.
 

kidwithxboxlive

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Aug 24, 2010
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Legendairy314 said:
I get to know the girl for a bit before I do anything. It allows me to find out her relationship status, interests, personality, and if she is attracted to me. Unfortunately I've yet to find a girl I like that is actually single or wants a relationship. If that were to happen I'd just get into a more talkative state with her and ask her face to face.
That was my plan of action if i like a girl, but i get scared that it might ruin our friendship if i do...
 

PrototypeC

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Apr 19, 2009
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I'll tell you when I find out (at 21, no less). :/

and yeah, if you can't talk to her(the most basic of human interaction), then that's a pretty clear sign that a relationship isn't going to come out of it.
 

Yokai

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Oct 31, 2008
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After losing the opportunity to ask out the most beautiful, intelligent and interesting girl I've ever met, despite having known her for a year and a half, I'm really getting fucking sick of being too much of a pansy to say anything.

So next time I fall for a girl, I'll spend a month getting to know her, then ask her to her face like a MAN. Enough of this shyness crap.
 

kidwithxboxlive

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Aug 24, 2010
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PrototypeC said:
I'll tell you when I find out (at 21, no less). :/

and yeah, if you can't talk to her(the most basic of human interaction), then that's a pretty clear sign that a relationship isn't going to come out of it.
Well you obviously haven't encountered, and it actually takes ALOT of courage and balls to tell a girl you like them/ask them out. When you fancy a girl and want to tell her, you get butterflies about the whole thing and have little doubts running round in your mind. Yes it may be a basic human interaction but one of the hardest in the circumstances.
 

kidwithxboxlive

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Aug 24, 2010
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OmniscientOstrich said:
This pretty much sums up what I think will happen anytime I approach a girl I like and thus why I generally don't:



If I approached a boy I like, I think they'd punch me. Yes, I'm aware I'm paranoid, why do you ask?
this is what goes through pretty much everyone mind i guess, i get that and afraid of rejection but i guess that might just be me...
 

Legendairy314

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Aug 26, 2010
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kidwithxboxlive said:
Legendairy314 said:
I get to know the girl for a bit before I do anything. It allows me to find out her relationship status, interests, personality, and if she is attracted to me. Unfortunately I've yet to find a girl I like that is actually single or wants a relationship. If that were to happen I'd just get into a more talkative state with her and ask her face to face.
That was my plan of action if i like a girl, but i get scared that it might ruin our friendship if i do...
I generally feel that if a girl wants a friendship with you more than a relationship then it's just another way of her telling you she doesn't feel that way about you. If you say that you find her attractive and ask her out that's nothing that should ruin a friendship. At best she agrees, at worse she sees it as a compliment and you both move past it and respect her decision.
 

A Free Man

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GraveeKing said:
Well first I'd go to a psychiatrist to see why my sexuality has changed.
No but seriously - I'd probably invite her and a couple of her or my own friends out, and drink until I can tell her my feelings, then if I still remember in the morning, I'll make sure I confirm it with her and explain I was too scared to tell otherwise.
Finally a realistic answer! Damn those people who have guts they make the rest of us look bad :( This is totally my plan as well. Get us both smashed and have a great time then tell her how I feel when we are a bit more comfortable together.

kidwithxboxlive said:
this is what goes through pretty much everyone mind i guess, i get that and afraid of rejection but i guess that might just be me...
Don't worry! Your not the only one. Honestly I think everyone is afraid of rejection at some level, some are just better at hiding it. If you aren't scared of being rejected then you don't really like the girl your trying to tell that you like her.... If that makes sense.
 

GraveeKing

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A Free Man said:
Finally a realistic answer! Damn those people who have guts they make the rest of us look bad :( This is totally my plan as well. Get us both smashed and have a great time then tell her how I feel when we are a bit more comfortable together.
See anyone who lies and just says they can do it is probably worse off - why lie and be the big man character? I really think people must be considerably insecure these days.
A casual greeting and getting drunk - What the hell is the point of some melodramatic face to face cheesy 'Darling I love you scene' - there's really nothing to be gained. The answer is going to most likely be the same no matter how you do it (unless you're a true wimp and do it via text etc), if it's over a romantic candlelit meal or at a pub with friends - same answer!

So here's to us cowards! Cheers!
 

Rainforce

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Apr 20, 2009
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Meh, I wouldn't do anything, except enjoying her presence.
I'm too harsh when it comes to accepting others as they are, so although she might be nice right now, everything will turn ugly the second I try to actually spend more time with her.
(I don't have a problem with that, being alone has its advantages, too)
The next thing would be that I would think that she doesn't really deserve someone like me, and would be better off with someone else.
Aaand a few thousand more thoughts of that flavor.

There's just no way in hell I would ask someone out. I'd rather make her life hell than allowing anything like a relationship.

[yes, it is creepy to listen to my own thoughts on that matter D:]

well, everything is fine as long as people like me stay a minority XD
 

StormShaun

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Feb 1, 2009
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I do it face to face, but first I hide it my feelings until I know I can't stand to tell them and that I truly like them.
 

Doclector

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Aug 22, 2009
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I would cover my ears and shout "LA LA LA LAAAAAA" until the voice telling me to ask her out goes away, because that would be a very stupid thing for such an abomnibly ugly person as me to do. She'd probably say something along the lines of "F*** no!", throw up, slap me round the face, tell everyone I'm a pervert, get a restraining and a shotgun in case I should muster the stupidity to try again.
 

JemothSkarii

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Nov 9, 2010
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Well, I've never been in a face-to-face relationship before: only ones I've had with girls overseas. First one lasted about 6 months, mostly just cybersex and wound up with the girl cheating on me with three other guys. The other one was with a girl I knew for 6 years, I dated her for 3, and despite the distance and some problems, I was madly in love with her and was preparing to go see her next year and she dumps me because we'd grown apart...I'm still reeling from that so I feel forever alone right now...

Despite how strongly I loved her (I have never even touched another girl), I've gotten a crush on one of my 'friends' (he's been a big dick the last few months) sister. We've been friends for about a year...but I'm probably just gonna let it drop unless she approaches me. Bad shit could happen if the relationship fails (I'm friends with the whole family), I'm still getting over my ex, and she's had...well...a very unfortunate past which makes her not want to date guys. So I'm not going to approach her; I want to respect her feelings, and I don't want to hurt her...but if she wants me with her, I'll do something. If not, I'll just watch over her and try find someone else.
 

smithy_2045

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Jan 30, 2008
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kidwithxboxlive said:
How do you deal with it? Do you tell them face to face or over text? Do you go for it and ask them out, or keep it quiet and hope they like you as well? What have you done in the past?

Me, I prefer to tell them face to face, as doing it over text or Facebook doesn't make me feel good about myself and I feel less manly. I personally like to feel that they have to kind of like me in the first place but sometimes, I lack the courage to tell them when I want to because I get really nervous and can't think straight. My last girlfriend asked me out over Facebook which wasn't very ideal but meh.
Share tales and experiences and tips as well if you want to :)


EDIT 1: Also, for the ladies out there, if your heterosexual, tell us about lads instead.

EDIT 2: If you have never liked a girl, tell us what kind of things you would do if you did like someone, see i love to get everyone involved ^_^
Almost 12 months ago to the day, I first "noticed" that someone I was sort of friends with was extremely attractive to me, and over the next 4 or 5 months I slowly realised that she wasn't just attractive physically, but that I also quite liked her. Unfortunately, since I'd had no previous experience with romantic feelings at all, I had no idea what to do, and foolishly kept waiting for the perfect opportunity to tell her I liked her. This just meant my feelings for her grew and grew, and as a result she was on my mind almost all the time. About 2 months ago I finally told her, but she'd already found someone else she was interested in, and because I'd left it so long it's been impossible for me to move on at all despite never actually being in a relationship with her.

So remember kids, don't put off telling someone you like how you feel, because they'll find someone else, and you won't know how to move on.
 

Sentox6

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Jun 30, 2008
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Stormz said:
Say nothing. I've never told any girl I liked how I feel. I just wait for it to go away. It's not that I don't want to say something, but my self esteem is bad enough as is.
That seems... rather bleak.

If I like a girl, I pretty much just go right after her, and see what happens. I've discovered that brief but explosive disasters are preferable to long-term pining. YMMV.