Some odd conversations with friends.
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Speaking of your friends' "3 wiggles" rule, one of my friends back home came up with this wise tidbit of advice. "If you shake it more than 3 times, you are masturbating."Aylaine said:They were the best friends I could ask for. <3hyperhammy said:Awesome story! Your friends are pretty cool!Aylaine said:Nothing to be ashamed about.Dango said:
A few years ago, me and my group of best friends were at Dennys eating, usually late at night. It was a sort of a tradition for us back then. Well, this one time it didn't look like we were going, so I'm like okay...what do I do now? That same night my best friend Charlene tells me over the phone that I should masturbate, 'because you are seriously in need and I know you want to sleep' So I say "Yeah, not gonna happen". After she hangs up, I tried to sleep, then just gave in. About 20 minutes after I was done and trying to sleep, I get a call and whaddya know, we are going to Dennys after all.
As the waitress was bringing us our food, Charlene says "I hope everyone washed their hands, especially Aylaine."
I got a bit self conscious and started to drink some water, and then a few of my other best friends asked,
"What do you mean?"
"Aylaine probably masturbated before she got here."
I immediately spit most of the water out and blushed, while my friends laughed. Twas quite embarrassing. Reflecting back, if I wasn't so shy about it then and kept my cool, it wouldn't have been such a big deal. Me and my best friends were open like this, but I was a late bloomer on sexuality so what was normal for them was definitely not normal for me.
Sort of OT: (well probably not) We were on a week long class trip, it was epic! I was in a room with my best friend and 4 other good friends. We unpacked our shit and started talking rules! Rule number one: No masturbating! Rule number two: No sit ups! Kind of a weird story behind that! We have this giant (literally) asshole in our class, and during our last class trip he woke up at 3 am and did the loudest fucking sit ups ever! It sounded like a hog was humping a screaming toad!
Hah, I love silly ground rules like that. They're fun to toss around, as a joke or just to be funny in general. A lot of my guy friends use the ''3 wiggles'' rule so that they don't make any messes on the toilet. How polite of them, though...a few people told me it's just because they can't aim their waterguns.
OT somewhat: Grrr...I can't think of anything like that. wait! I just remembered. Today at work a friend of mine said she's usually the bottom when she's with her husband. Then she said she would never be the top, because her husband would never let her go near him with a strap-on. All of a sudden, she said she felt cold. We asked her why, and she said, "My nipples never get hard, but they are now!" Holy crap, did we laugh. XD
Or, the time some friends and I heard a rumor that some guy was messing around with a girl. Supposedly, he couldn't find a condom, so he grabbed a plastic bag. Yea. A plastic bag. For the next few weeks, if we saw each other around campus, we'd go up to them with a big plastic bag for French bread. We'd put the bag on their desk and say, "Here's your condom."
I remember one time, when I was helping a friend of mine lay a brick path around the side of her mom's place, I was digging some dirt out of the way to make the path level and I jumped up and shouted, "I got it!"
My friend look at me, "Got what?"
"This video I saw on youtube, at the very end of it, there was a clip of music, only like 3-5 seconds long. I saw it like 6 months ago and I just remembered where the music was from."
"What was it?"
"It was Dragonball Z music. I have no idea what made me remember, but I just did."
"You are so weird."
My friend look at me, "Got what?"
"This video I saw on youtube, at the very end of it, there was a clip of music, only like 3-5 seconds long. I saw it like 6 months ago and I just remembered where the music was from."
"What was it?"
"It was Dragonball Z music. I have no idea what made me remember, but I just did."
"You are so weird."
Okay, an update:
I was just talking to my female friend, and we were talking about dreams we had, and I admitted I had a dream where I made out with her. She was like: "okay xD", So I replied: "You wanna make out when you're single again?" and she was like "sure... why not xD"
I was just talking to my female friend, and we were talking about dreams we had, and I admitted I had a dream where I made out with her. She was like: "okay xD", So I replied: "You wanna make out when you're single again?" and she was like "sure... why not xD"
What the ending song to Ponyo would sound like if it were made by Cannibal Corpse.
Also, shock images and chili. Don't ask.
Also, shock images and chili. Don't ask.
It's always good to have friends like that. XDhyperhammy said:
On a somewhat similar note, one of my best friends has this female friend. They've liked each other for a long time and have actually gone out. Here's the thing though.
She recently broke up with like a 30-something year old (she's about 20) and my friend just turned 21. She took him out to dinner a while back and paid, but while paying, she "accidentally" let him see the pocket rocket she keeps in her purse. Then she wanted to sleep with him.
At first, I told him to go for it. He's never had sex, so I figured that if it was someone he at least knew and has liked for a while it would actually be a good first experience.
Then he tells me a bit more about her. How she's a sex addict and uses the pocket rocket several times a day, how she has this and that psychological thing. I told him to run. Run as fast as he could. She started calling him several times a day, at all sorts of hours. Eventually he told her to leave him alone.
I went out with a crazy girl once. She was schizophrenic and bipolar. It wasn't fun. At all. XD
I once had to explain to a friend, what strippers are and what they do; and what a lap dance is. That kid was sheltered.
Every day, during second period me and my friend have random conversations; and by random, I mean random. I think one was about how he was actually my real father.
I have a constant conversation with my friend John, about how everything is his fault. Everything...ever.
We have also been naming movies, back and forth, any movie we could think of; we started last month, it's starting to get hard (that's what she said) to name movies, having to name obscure foreign films now. In fact if anyone wants to help me out...feel free to do so.
Every day, during second period me and my friend have random conversations; and by random, I mean random. I think one was about how he was actually my real father.
I have a constant conversation with my friend John, about how everything is his fault. Everything...ever.
We have also been naming movies, back and forth, any movie we could think of; we started last month, it's starting to get hard (that's what she said) to name movies, having to name obscure foreign films now. In fact if anyone wants to help me out...feel free to do so.
I was on a retreat with my church youth group, and we were in cabins. While pulling an all-nighter with some friends, we started adding "manly" words to the beginning of forms of government to try and name our government for our cabin. We got "Manarchy" (which we stuck with, and is based on monarchy, not anarchy), bromocracy, etc. Then I came up with "Dictatorship"... read it out loud and see if you get it.
It's funnier when you're sleep deprived, but it was most certainly odd.
It's funnier when you're sleep deprived, but it was most certainly odd.
Actually, I just remembered a story that a friend of mine told me.
Apparently, when he was in highschool, a bunch of friends of his were making stupid bets, like who could hold their hand under hot hot running water the longest and such. Anyway, some genius got the bright idea of putting icyhot on their balls. So they all did it, minus my friend and one or two others. They said that when they masturbated, they were shooting blanks, and one guy apparently put it all over his balls, and he said that he shot blood.
My only reaction to that was, "Bummer."
Apparently, when he was in highschool, a bunch of friends of his were making stupid bets, like who could hold their hand under hot hot running water the longest and such. Anyway, some genius got the bright idea of putting icyhot on their balls. So they all did it, minus my friend and one or two others. They said that when they masturbated, they were shooting blanks, and one guy apparently put it all over his balls, and he said that he shot blood.
My only reaction to that was, "Bummer."
Most of my conversations with friends eventually turn to talking about sex/boobs/fetishes/hentai/insert sex related topic here.
Actually, all our conversations turn out that way. What makes it awkward is that half my friends are female.
Actually, all our conversations turn out that way. What makes it awkward is that half my friends are female.
Most of my friends are female. I guess it doesn't really bother me all that much. The really amusing bit comes from the fact that most of my friends haven't had sex yet, which makes things interesting. XDMacgyvercas said:
Once was talking to some firends about how I don't like a fruity thing we have in Rio that is quite popular (we call it açaí) and they said that they never saw a man saying he didn't like that, to which I replied that the fact that I didn't like that thing didn't mean I had a vagina. Then one of them asked "what if you had a vagina? What would you do?". I didn't quite expect that and I didn't know what to say. When we asked what he would do, he said "I would masturbate of course!". Never really gave it that much thought though, I'm quite happy with my penis (despite the fact that it has never been used in anything that was not my right hand... tears) and my curiosity did not extend itself in this subject oddly enough.
