Stories of Total War...

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Andrewtheeviscerator

It's Leviosahhhhhhh
Feb 23, 2012
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Well not so much as a story as a very quick fail. I was playing Empire: Total war as the Russians. I attacked a Crimean Khanate fort, out manned them by over 200 men felt pretty confident in myself. Get to the deployment stage and I decide not to move my men around, poor choice. I have my Generals in front, then my lines of Cossacks, infantry, cannons, and cavalry in the back. Start the battle, see the enemy line coming towards me and I command my cannons to fire on them. My canons fire and they immediately a General, except its my General. Still foolishly thinking I could win this fight I send out my men and about 5 minutes into the battle my front lines start to retreat. So I did the only noble thing I could think, I quit the game without saving.
 

Bernzz

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imahobbit4062 said:
Bernzz said:
imahobbit4062 said:
*snippity*
I thought to myself "Kyoto can't be THAT bad to capture.."

After getting to it on the map?
"Holy shit mother of god, its the most heavily defended place I've seen" and I've played 100 or so hours of Rome..

Then I went bankrupt, so I had to start again. Now I'm close, have plenty of money. I'm just slowly building a mass army. I'll be sure to update this thread when I start my siege.
Oh, you should. I'm interested to hear how it all goes. I love playing Total War, even if I'm bad at it, but I especially love hearing the epic stories it creates.
 

talker

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Nov 18, 2011
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in medieval TW2 i was playing as england and had conquered:
-the UK & Ireland
-north-west europa
-the spanish peninsula
-germany&the north
-the north of italy
-everything between current lybia and the mountains north of jerusalem
-two cities in america
i was pushing west and south with my forces in spain and the middle east, south with my italian mercenary bands, and i was waiting for a shipment of heavy billmen and arquebusiers to wipe out the aztecs but the thing that made me stop was that i was at a stalemate in eastern europe with the mongols and in the north of my saudi-arabia with the turks. the turkish point wasn't so bad because it was a REAL stalemate. armies of mine were desrtoyed in their lands, their heirs were assassinated by luck and my incredibly ###### assassins (they just can't get above four stars. *sigh*. i guess we'll never see an assassin like jack the ripper again (that was his real name!)), but in east europa i was constantly trying to recapture cities, but i am hideously understaffed there. maybe i'll go play some more when i have posted this.
 

Jarek Mace

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Jun 8, 2009
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Defending my capital from an army dropped off by boat in Shogun 2, just the recently battle-ready prince, a small handful of cavalry and two units of yari archers against an army 20x their size.
We did it, we held them off at the cost of the princes life.

Goodnight, sweet prince.
 

crazypsyko666

I AM A GOD
Apr 8, 2010
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I'm a fan of the Holy Roman Empire in Medieval 2, except I usually have trouble holding all of the lands I end up conquering. So one game, instead of letting my country eat itself apart slowly, I just let it die. I kept a few wealthy Italian cities from collapsing while turning city after city into a rebel nation. I didn't win, but I sure as hell made sure everyone else lost. Until I hit Russia, that is.

Damn Russians.
 

Da Orky Man

Yeah, that's me
Apr 24, 2011
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Well, there was one campaign in Rome...
I was playing as the Britons. Now, this is still pretty early in the game, having only recently got Chosen Swordsman. Anyway, I had been a bit lax in my Empire building, only owning Britain itself and most of Ireland. A new heir had just come to age, so I sent him out with a new army in an invasion of Gaul, planning on capturing a few juicy cities then keeping him as governor.
That one guy, from coming to age to dying of age, led a massive crusade around most of western Europe, conquering all of Gaul, most of Spain, devastating everything he ran into, and even made a few forays through the Alps into Italy itself. He never became governor for more than a year or so, as he kept being needed to lead the next stampede. He died of old age just before the invasion of Italy took place.
Now, I don't think he ever lost a battle. After he died, I sent another family member to take command, who had spent most of his time fending off the remains of the Gaulish tribes. I went straight across the Alps, and began the invasion.
It failed terribly. The Romans, despite not really being ready, decimated my forces. I still maintain that, should that one family member have survived, Rome would be mine.

RIP, guy with the forgettable name, conqueror of Europe.
 

GundamSentinel

The leading man, who else?
Aug 23, 2009
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I'll just tell of one of my latest great victories:

Playing Shogun 2, my army (Satsuma, consisting mostly of archers with a couple units of katana samurai and naginata samurai) was attacked in the field by 2 armies from Uesugi. Those armies were far more balanced with lots of infantry and cavalry, but lacking in bowmen.

Luckily, the terrain was to my advantage. There was a small but steep hill with a cliff facing the enemy in my deployment area and I put every archer I had on that hill and put my melee soldiers at the approach to the hill to block off the advance.

It worked like a dream: both enemy armies were stopped in their tracks with arrows raining down on them. It was a complete massacre with both enemy armies routed and small losses to my forces.

Playing Fall of the Samurai again now, but I miss the melee from the vanilla game.
 

Dandark

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Sep 2, 2011
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I recently picked up my first Total war game in the Steam sale, Shogun 2.

I was playing as the Date and started in Northern Japan so I started conquering southwards. I came across a clan who had been good to me, they traded plenty with me and didn't try to wipe me out when I had a large rebellion in my lands(Unlike their now occupied neighbor). So when the time came to defeat their one province I offered to make them my vassal and they agreed. All was well and good, I defeated the army of the province next to them and let them capture it then continued southward.



Their two territories cut through my land but it was fine since I had military access seeing as they are my vassal. They were also cut off and therefore completely safe from the larger clans south of them who they were at war with as these clans would have to cross my lands to get to them. This did not go well when one of the clans tried that.

However the relationship seemed to deteriorate as time went on, they became less friendly and continued building up their armies despite being completely safe. They eventually joined a trade embargo against me and stopped trading. I let it pass but they joined another one after that, at this point I realized that they clearly were not happy as my vassal and decided that I didn't want a potentially hostile clan in the middle of my territory, especially since they were only a couple of seasons march from my home province where the Daimyo was.

They were my vassal and hadn't yet declared their independence so declaring war on them would have damaged my diplomatic relations, after all what kind of tyrant doesn't honour his agreements?
I called my most elite ninja back from his operations in enemy territory(Sabotaging army supplies and assassinating generals and other key figures to help deal with these ungrateful cowards. He assasinated their Dayimo and wounded his heir before moving to sabotage the cities and ports.

South of them past my territories was a clan I was at peace with who was at war with my vassal. They had been trying to get more friendly with me so that I would grant them military access to my lands so that they could conquer my vassal. I entered an alliance with them and granted them access to my lands as they had long hoped for.


When the vassal called for help I refused as is my right since they started the war. With the treaty broken and my honour and reputation preserved I declared war on them and took their home province then I allowed the other clan to take their other province. It all worked out pretty well except for the fact I still have a clan territory in the middle of mine. However I am confident that we will continue to have a prosperous alliance and that they will not turn on me soon as they will need my aid to fight the great and mighty clan to the south of them.
 

Blunderboy

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Apr 26, 2011
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I?ve had many great moments, but the one what leaps to mind was during a Julii campaign on Rome 1, with the Mundus Magnus map mod.
I was besieging a Gaulish city with a legion made up of about a dozen units. The defending force was roughly the same size. When I attacked it was revealed that lurking in the forest behind me was a second force of about fifteen units.
I used my rams to break down the gates, turned half of my force around to hold the gates and then had a tough fight to capture the city from the garrison while the relief force tried in vain to get past my forces at the gates.
It was so intense I had to have a break right afterwards.

Also OP, you should join the Total Warriors group. As should everyone.
 

Blunderboy

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Apr 26, 2011
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I?ve also recalled an early Brutii campaign, were I pushed too far too quickly and ended up having a legion cut off from the rest of the Empire holding a city against continual full stack attacks by Ptolemaic armies. Every single turn.
I didn?t have time to retrain any units.
After about the tenth battle, I had a legion that was comprised of units that were only a handful of men, but had such a high experience level that it wasn?t uncommon for see hundred of Ptolemaic soldiers fleeing from two dozen legionaries.
When I eventually got a relief column too them, I was very careful not to retrain them and instead merged them with other high experience units from across the Empire.
 
Feb 22, 2009
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My story in Total War is always like, get to the end holding 4 regions too few, fail miserably while trying to invade everywhere at once in a mad rush.

I really suck at Total War. XD
 

Nami nom noms

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Apr 26, 2011
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The only one of any interest to people I can recall would be when I was playing as the julii; I had almost fully conquered Gaul and was beginning my march on the britons, when the Spanish, who had thenceforth been my allies for the better part of a century, decided to betray me and attack my town.

When they attacked that town was particularly vulnerable, so a handful of town guard and archers and one unit of equites managed to hold onto the town (took a whole ton of micromanagement) but were almost wiped out in the process.

However, the next turn, more forces were able to arrive and not only dispel the attackers but eradicate them to the man. of the 1000+ spanish sent, NONE returned.

From there I halted my other plans and embarked on a vicious campaign of revenge upon the Spanish, sweeping my army from town to town and killing every single soldier and slaughtering the populace. By the time I reached the final spanish city, only two soldiers had ever managed to escape my armies.

I besieged the final city and sent in a diplomat; demanding a ridiculous sum of money to prevent thier destruction. Of course they had no choice but to accept.


I then attacked the city anyway, and enslaved the citizens :p


The moral is: don't betray me!
 

AlotFirst

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Mar 29, 2011
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Feel free to whine all you want about the AI in (Shogun 2) Total War, but it has gained my respect. Not too long ago I was assisting an allied Clan in capturing a fortress. He needed my forces otherwise his army wouldn't last against the enemy. Yet, while I was placing my cannons and maneuvring my forces, he was already attacking the Fortress with an army that consisted primarily of archers.
I gave the "Stop" command to my cannons and instead sent my regular forces to assist him. I was too late, his troops were getting routed, and two groups of archers were rushing towards the central point of the fort, in a seemingly desparate attempt to capture the building by holding it. He pulled all of his units towards the center and the enemy tried to follow him, but failed to do before my ally was in control of the center for 60 seconds.
 

kingthrall

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May 31, 2011
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the biggest battle I ever fought was over an hour. I had at least 8 full stacks of saracen warriors in medival total war 1 agaist about 6 full enemy stacks of turkish. It was probally the most epic battle I have ever done and ended up losing about 3 whole armies in this one battle.

Its a real shame I never saved it, was years ago but I still remember fighting and slaying the whole enemy army only to see another full stack appear from the flank. Was kind of ridiculous when I think I should have just auto-resolved it but It pretty much decided the game as I ended up as Egypt steamrolling all the way to england and only poland as the remaining faction after this battle.
 

Yokillernick

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May 11, 2012
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R:TW

Year: 196 BC

Sides: Me as the Julii's top generals of all time (had 8 or 9 stars) with 2000 men which included- 2x Archer Auxilia, 3x Praetorian Cohorts, 5x Legionary Cohort, 1x First Legionary Cohort, 2x Onagers as well as 500 Praetorian cavalry.
Versus: The Scipii. Their forces were lead by the Scipii faction heir who had no idea of how to command his troops (0 stars) but he had numbers on his side. His army had 1500 men which included- 5x Praetorian Cohorts, 3x Onagers, 2x Scorpions, 1x Roman Cavalry, 4x Auxillia. However he was reinforced by 3 other armies all of which were made of around 1200 men. Those armies were made up of around 3x Praetorian Cohorts each , 6x Legionary Cohorts as well as some Roman cavalry. So there I was outnumbered 2:1 but my forces were eager and more experienced than their enemy. These were the troops which conquered Gaul and Britain as well as led the assault against Rome in which again they were outnumbered by they managed to win.

The Battle: As I was outlawed by Rome for refusing to make my faction leader commit suicide, the Scipii were the first to attack me. But after conquering Rome and the rest of Italy they fell back to Carthage. So I led the chase to bring those traitors of Rome to justice.

Now I had caught up to them and decided to set up camp nearby thinking about laying an ambush the following day but to my luck the Scipii ceased running and turned around. This caused me to think. They wouldn't attack me as they are outnumbered and outmatched- I thought. They must have an ace up their sleeve. And I was right as I formed battle lines, all of the Cohorts formed lines of 3 men deep with Onagers behind and Archers in front as well as 2 Legions of Cavalry covering each flank, my scouts reported seeing 3 medium sized Scipii armies coming from every side. Now I was outnumbered and trapped between them. After an emotional speech of how I want to bathe in Scipii blood. The men were ready. As I saw the reinforces coming onto my left and right flank I took 3 Legions of infantry and made them face our flanks in a hope to stall the enemies while the main line would push back the main force. Soon the battle began. Arrows flying pinning hundreds of men to the ground but still they advanced. Then it was time for the javelin greeting. Again hundreds more fell but I told my men to hold their ground. The flanks were not secure. The right flank was sustaining heavy damage so I, Rome's greatest general, led the cavalry behind the Scipii and they were soon being killed on both sides. I directed another Praetorian cavalry to charge them from behind as soon their Captain was slain. His men lost heart and routed. But I had no time to celebrate as the Scipii reinforcements which came from the rear were now very close. So quickly I sent one legion to reinforce the left flank and had the other 2 as well as the cavalry ready to meet the enemies. But we were hopelessly outnumbered on that flank so I decided to tell my archers to open fire on the Scipii's Captain unit. By some blind luck they actually killed the Captain. Seeing this I sent one of my Praetorian Cavalry around the back and attacked them from the rear causing them to rout. By this time my main battle line was driving the Scipii General back and even, a few seconds later, they managed to kill him. His forces began retreating so all that was left now was the small 1200 army on my left flank on which I sent all my troops to attack quickly routing them. The day was ours but not without some dire casualties.

Casualties: Me- I lost around 600 men to the enemies advances but not one Legion was wiped out meaning that they could be reinforced.
The Scipii- They lost around 3900 men, 3 Captains and the Faction Heir. Their armies were fractured and so I was able to march onto Carthage unopposed.
 

gunny1993

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Jun 26, 2012
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I had a great few mins on Empire where i was defedning a wall in a seige, the wall was breached by cannon fire and i quickly moved a squad of elite troops to fill it. Unfortunatly i was attacked by 4 squads of grendiers. After 1 barrage nearly all my troops were dead. Except 1, this one lone man the decided that this would be a great time to pull out his pistol and begin to fire at the oncoming horde.... like a sir.