tactical dating

[Da Chi]

Invite a co-worker or acquaintance out to drinks. Invite three or four friends. One female, someone you trust, and maybe someone funny but ugly. Your friends will likely include your acquaintance in the conversation but she will likely be a bit out of place. Suggest going somewhere else when you notice her start to shy from the conversation. If she agrees you have a date. Take her somewhere nice, get to know her. Before you know it you'll be on the fifth date and your friends will have forgotten you blowing them off. The End

i take it you let your friends know in advance and get them to talk about people they know, and say in jokes etc

No, that's a bit too underhanded. Let them know an hour or so in advance that you are bringing someone and thats it. Excluding the girl you are bringing is probably the rudest thing you can do and you can expect she won't want to come again. Talk lots, have fun, and see what happens

nah make it look as if your friends are excluding her then go away with her on her own

no wait, thats a bad idea because then she'll hate your friends. bros before hoes rule is then broken

If your friends exclude her it's like YOU are excluding her. It's psychology of girls, if their friends dislike her, HE must dislike her. It's wierd I know but I've found myself telling several of my female friends how stupid they are being when she says "He's going to break up with me! I met his friends and they hate me!"
Which is usually caused by her being anti-social and not really fitting in with a group of dudes hence why you invite a girl. Preferably a girl who thinks you are a super awesome dude but doesn't want to get the freak on with you. Your friend talks to your date about how awesome you are when they powder their noses and you're in.

 

[burningdragoon]

To be honest, that seems downright sociopathic. The idea of manipulating people's lives and emotions, and deceiving them into a date seems disgusting to me. And I can not imagine how anyone would build a solid relationship on such a lie.

I'd have to agree with this. I think you should be able to think of some form of "tactical dating" that isn't a straight up lie, but I dunno.

 

[Da Chi]

To be honest, that seems downright sociopathic. The idea of manipulating people's lives and emotions, and deceiving them into a date seems disgusting to me. And I can not imagine how anyone would build a solid relationship on such a lie.

I'd have to agree with this. I think you should be able to think of some form of "tactical dating" that isn't a straight up lie, but I dunno.

I really feel like my solution is not a lie. There is no manipulation and it requires you to be honest with your intentions.

 

[Kpt._Rob]

To be honest, that seems downright sociopathic. The idea of manipulating people's lives and emotions, and deceiving them into a date seems disgusting to me. And I can not imagine how anyone would build a solid relationship on such a lie.

I'd have to agree with this. I think you should be able to think of some form of "tactical dating" that isn't a straight up lie, but I dunno.

Even without the lie, I don't like the idea. I've been studying psychology for a long time, I have a good idea of how people work, and if I wanted to I could pretty easily manipulate people. But anytime I catch myself doing it, I stop myself. Manipulating people into doing what you want isn't healthy for them or for you. It reduces people to mechanical dolls, the operations of which are to be controlled for one's own benefit. But in the process of reducing people to mechanical dolls, we lose our ability to connect with them. Probably the single most important part of being a human being is forming bonds with those around us, but when we reduce them to chess pieces we can move to win a game, we lose the ability to connect with them on a deeper more meaningful level. If all you care about is getting laid, then I suppose this sort of thing might be for you, but if you want to have a relationship that is rewarding, not just physically, but spiritually, then you can't let yourself manipulate others.

 

[shootthebandit]

refering to anyone who says its not right to trick someone. i was saying this was a hypothetical thread. i also think its much more effort and probably equally sucessful as actually approaching them, talking to them and letting them know your interested. if they dont like you then move on.

 

[burningdragoon]

To be honest, that seems downright sociopathic. The idea of manipulating people's lives and emotions, and deceiving them into a date seems disgusting to me. And I can not imagine how anyone would build a solid relationship on such a lie.

I'd have to agree with this. I think you should be able to think of some form of "tactical dating" that isn't a straight up lie, but I dunno.

I really feel like my solution is not a lie. There is no manipulation and it requires you to be honest with your intentions.

Oh, I missed your post. That's actually pretty good.

To be honest, that seems downright sociopathic. The idea of manipulating people's lives and emotions, and deceiving them into a date seems disgusting to me. And I can not imagine how anyone would build a solid relationship on such a lie.

I'd have to agree with this. I think you should be able to think of some form of "tactical dating" that isn't a straight up lie, but I dunno.

Even without the lie, I don't like the idea. I've been studying psychology for a long time, I have a good idea of how people work, and if I wanted to I could pretty easily manipulate people. But anytime I catch myself doing it, I stop myself. Manipulating people into doing what you want isn't healthy for them or for you. It reduces people to mechanical dolls, the operations of which are to be controlled for one's own benefit. But in the process of reducing people to mechanical dolls, we lose our ability to connect with them. Probably the single most important part of being a human being is forming bonds with those around us, but when we reduce them to chess pieces we can move to win a game, we lose the ability to connect with them on a deeper more meaningful level. If all you care about is getting laid, then I suppose this sort of thing might be for you, but if you want to have a relationship that is rewarding, not just physically, but spiritually, then you can't let yourself manipulate others.

Yeah, manipulating others is bad too. So someone could come up with a way that is both not lying and not manipulating then, hehe. The group outing idea Da Chi had seems ok if you are upfront with everything.

 

[HigherTomorrow]

Or...you could...you know...ask her out on a real date?

 

[TheTaco007]

Or you can just man up and ASK SOMEONE OUT.

Seriously, it's NOT THAT HARD.

 

[Macgyvercas]

Roofies or chloroform... I am a traditionalist.

thats just rape

OBJECTION! it's only rape if she says no.

Correction! Rape is an assault by a person involving sexual intercourse with another person without that person's consent. Someone who is unconscious can not legally consent, so it would be rape. And implied consent (where it is assumed the person would give consent if they were capable of doing so) doesn't work here either (that only works for life saving first aid).

 

[firedfns13]

so i have discovered a new concept i have not used (and probably wouldnt) but i would regard as a good idea. its called tactical dating i got the idea from this pepsi advert http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GiaNFcMSbmA

heres the basic concept: if you cannot get a girl (or boy) then you may require a clever tactic)

heres my idea: you get a freind to organise a date, get them to tell you were and when they are meeting. wait at that location and walk around awkward looking at your watch and once they get a bit impatient ask them if they have been stood up (which they have thanks to your friend), then tell them that you have also been stood up and then go from there. you will instanly have a mutual understanding

N.B: this is just really a hypothetical thread, it would probably be much easier to get a date legitimatly rather than make some eloborate shame

so what would your tactic be?

My tactics are varied:

My tactic for the UIC target trip was jokingly walking up to girls and saying, "Hi I'm Name_Here. Nice to meet you."
Worked quite well, got 4 numbers, and the girl I'm currently hooking up with, and 3 friends out of it.

Another one that worked but requires some luck (worked-ish, seeing as I haven't gotten her number yet) was walking on the elevator at the same time as a group of girls, asking what floor they're on, and press the button for them. Strike up small talk and get off at your floor, then turn around and press all the buttons. They'll yell something, which I yelled back "At least you'll remember me!"
They did; I didn't recognize them in the hallway until they yelled "There's the elevator boy" and filled me in to what I did.

However, the 'Hi my name is' tactic only works in situations that you can approach people. You gotta use your own judgement, though I can say by my own experience this year that approaching girls leaning over the railings at a soccer match or a girl that has a guy with her in the dining hall does not work.

 

[Soylent Dave]

So I was thinking maybe I could bide my time with the mother, get in good with the daughter, let her percolate until she comes of age. . .

Aside from that being a preferred tactic of sexual predators (or 'paedophiles' if you prefer), so you probably wouldn't want to get yourself confused with one of them, the girl thinks you'd be a suitable boyfriend for her mum, and as such will never ever ever be interested in you, ever.

Ever.

(also don't knock older women. They're less likely to talk utter bollocks at you and expect you to give a shit...)

 

[Hoplon]

*Sniff* *Sniff* is that the sink of horrible desperation?

I think it is.

Seriously, what's with the need for elaborate plans to date some one?

 

[Erana]

To be honest, that seems downright sociopathic. The idea of manipulating people's lives and emotions, and deceiving them into a date seems disgusting to me. And I can not imagine how anyone would build a solid relationship on such a lie.

I'd have to agree with this. I think you should be able to think of some form of "tactical dating" that isn't a straight up lie, but I dunno.

Even without the lie, I don't like the idea. I've been studying psychology for a long time, I have a good idea of how people work, and if I wanted to I could pretty easily manipulate people. But anytime I catch myself doing it, I stop myself. Manipulating people into doing what you want isn't healthy for them or for you. It reduces people to mechanical dolls, the operations of which are to be controlled for one's own benefit. But in the process of reducing people to mechanical dolls, we lose our ability to connect with them. Probably the single most important part of being a human being is forming bonds with those around us, but when we reduce them to chess pieces we can move to win a game, we lose the ability to connect with them on a deeper more meaningful level. If all you care about is getting laid, then I suppose this sort of thing might be for you, but if you want to have a relationship that is rewarding, not just physically, but spiritually, then you can't let yourself manipulate others.

The sad truth is that there are a lot of people out there who could care less of spiritual rewards, and another large group of people who insist that people who are interested in true emotional connections are losers who will never find someone.
Which is a terrible, terrible notion.
Ideally, I'll only surround myself with people interested in true relationships, both in the platonic and the romantic. I can't help but fear the, "people wind up dating their parents" thing, though...

But yeah, if there's someone I'm interested in, I'll man... Erm... woman up to it and ask them out. If they're threatened by a woman asking them out, then they prolly aren't the guy for me in the first place.

 

[SimuLord]

"I think that A, you have an act and B, not having an act is your act."

Cookie for the reference. And seriously, guys? I'm not a girl, but I've dated enough of them to know that they will tell stories about what idiots you guys were after they've dumped your asses.

 

[NLS]

Clever plans sometimes work out. Not sure if it was her plan to get me or my plan to get her, but it worked at the end of the day.

 

[sageoftruth]

Roofies or chloroform... I am a traditionalist.

thats just rape

OBJECTION! it's only rape if she says no.

And when she sees you hanging out with her original date and puts it all together?

suggest a threesome?

So I guess unconsciousness means consent?

 

[hyperhammy]

Roofies or chloroform... I am a traditionalist.

thats just rape

You say rape. I say surprise sex.

"surprise butt secks!"
Cookie for the reference.

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

Well it seems like a clever idea, it just seems a bit too risky. Having your good friend stand her up would get really awkward if she ever found out about you two hanging out. Even if she didn't put two and two together. Perhaps it would be a better strategy if it were more refined...