The Best Chuck Norris Joke you know?

[kuposenpai]

Ozzie bites the head off of bats, not wanting to be outdone, Chuck Norris bites the head off of Batman.

 

[sunburst]

When Chuck Norris has a problem, he asks Bill Nye.

Am I doing it right?

 

[DeathWyrmNexus]

The best Chuck Norris joke I know is the one he turned himself into...

 

[Chromatic Aberration]

Chuck Norris once traded his soul to the devil for his superior fighting skills.
Once he got them he gave the devil a roundhouse kick and took it back.
The devil, not being a bad loser, said he should have known better.
Since then, they always play poker together on thursdays.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

Remember when these kind of jokes used to be all the rave, well lets get it out of our system

~Chuck Norris knows the final digit of Pi

The phrase "i think therefore i am" is actually a shortened version of the original "I think therefore i am scared of Chuck norris"

 

[FLegmA]

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer,too bad he never cries.

 

[Rasputin1]

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

EDIT: Damnit that ones been said already.

Chuck Norris actually died ten years ago. Death just doesn't have the balls to let him know.

There are 1072 objects in a living room Chuck Norris can use to kill you, including the room itself.

 

[GodofDisaster]

Never really cared for the Chuck Norris jokes, although there are three that made me chortle.

Chuck Norris gives blood to the red cross every day, its just never his own.

Chuck Norris is never late and if he is, then time better slow the fuck down.

Chuck Norris can win a game of connect four in three turns.

 

[NOT WILL]

Christ can walk on water Chuck Norris can swim through land
Chuck Norris shot his age on 18 holes when he was 17

 

[TAGM]

When Chuck Norris walks into a bar, it's the bar that goes "Ouch."

 

[oOPandemoniumOo]

Chuck Norris's toughest challenge was the laws of reality.

 

[Halceon]

Jānis Endzelīns can tell your brithplace, parents' nationality, bank account numbers and the name of everyone present at your birth just by hearing a few sentences.


Because Chuck isn't cool enough to be a hero anymore.

 

[Julianking93]

Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

 

[The Night Shade]

When the boogyman goes to sleep he checks under his bed for Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can count infinite twice

When Chuck Norris shoots instead of punching he is being mercyful

 

[ultimateownage]

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

 

[Yureina]

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

 

[oOPandemoniumOo]

Just remembered this one:

Some people can piss their name in the snow, Chuck Norris pisses his name into cement.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

When Cuck Norris' daughter lost her virginity, he went and got it back for her.

 

[xavierxenon]

None, they are all absolutely shit.