The Best Chuck Norris Joke you know?

[Destal]

Chunk Norris turned God into an Atheist.

Contrary to popular belief the US didn't actually drop any nuclear weapons on Japan, they dropped Chuck Norris and that was the result.

 

[Chumba]

Chuck Norris CAN talk about Fight Club

 

[Contun]

What was the last thing that went through the mind of one of Chuck Norris' victims?

....

Spoiler: :O

His Fist.

 

[Fitzie94]

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle
Chuck Norris doesn't have blood he is filled with molten magma
When Chuck Norris was a baby he was rocked to sleep with actual rocks

 

[Contun]

Chuck Norris makes his Coffee in the morning by grinding up Coffee Beans with his teeth and boiling them with his rage.

 

[UberLemonBoy]

5 out of 5 dentist prefer chuck norris

 

[Jark212]

So no one mentioned this one yet...

 

[Fenreil]

Not really a "joke" per se, but still relevant

Spoiler

It's on a T-shirt.

 

[Snarky Username]

It is said that whenever you masturbate, God kills a kitten.

It is also said that whenever God masturbates, Chuck Norris kills a tiger.

 

[Cameron Baxter]

chuck norris wrote all these jokes on his own website not cos he has a high opinion of himself he just likes to keep people well informed

 

[NeutralMunchHotel]

None, they are all absolutely shit.

I wondered when it would be that someone would feel the need to be so... Escapist-y and say something like this.

Seems it happens here all too often.

 

[Contun]

Not really a "joke" per se, but still relevant

Spoiler

It's on a T-shirt.

Periodic Table? Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

 

[hiks89]

chuck norris doesnt wear a watch he DECIDES what time it is

 

[AvsJoe]

Tornadoes do not exist,

Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks!

 

[dthvirus]

One of Chuck Norris's sperm escaped into the engine of a truck when having sex in the back of a pickup truck. We now know that truck as Optimus Prime.

 

[OmegaXIII]

Chuck Norris invented the caesarian section when he roundhouse kicked himself out of his mother's womb

Chuck Norris' favourite breakfast cereal is Kelloggs Nails n' Grit

Chuck Norris can say Candlejack, however when Candlejack says Chuck Norris he...

Behind Chuck Norris' bead isn't a face, but another fist

 

[Fralf]

http://www.nochucknorris.com/

 

[truncatd]

Bigfoot takes pictures of Chuck Norris.