The Escapist Avatar Adventure: An Open RP (Now Re-Opened!)

[Pm0n3y]

Hm. Interesting. Wonder how that'll turn out. Anywho...

MEANWHILE!

Phil couldn't but help but laugh at Sam's clever-as-hell TTGL based pun. But the laughing was cut short as he saw the angels quickly begin to overtake Sam. He reached for is H.a.L.O, but then came up with a better idea. As the angles began to corner the fellow hero, Phil glided up to them, swiping them back with his armblades. As Phil helped Sam to his feet, He took his H.a.L.O off. As he did so, it formed into a gold portable drill.

"If you're gonna fight, you're gonna need one of these." He said to Sam. The glow of the shiny drill made Sam's eyes widen in amazement.

"Just remember to give it back when you're finished with it, okay?" He said before flying into Metatron, armblades and teeth bare.

 

[SpaceSpork]

"LULZ!" Shouted Sidoh. "U GUIZ R TEH GAYZ0RZ!" Sidoh then lifted the Washington Monument, and smacked Metatron in the head, which only served to anger him even more. "Shit." Said Sidoh. "Anyone want to inform me who Metatron is?"

 

[Orinon]

Seeing the giant robot the Cybers got an idea
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked Ryan
"Yep," said Rhianna, they fused together becoming one robot, a super Rhianna (This may get confusing to put it simple it's like when Ryan was first CybeRhianna.) Rhianna then called out to the robot
"Hey there you feeling lonely."
"What!" said Ryan inside her head "This wasn't what I was thinking at all I wanted to blast the shit out of him?" Yeah but my way is funnier."
Metatron noticing the perfect ten female cyborg in front of him, suddenly calmed down Rhianna flew to a distant planet. She then led him into a magnetically sealed door she went inside Metatron was uneasy but he then saw a t-shirt that looked exactly like the one Rhianna had worn. He quickly ran inside Rhianna exited through a secret door still wearing her t-shirt. "Wait what said a bystander
"I have an extra t-shirt I just threw it over my shoulder. Guys always do stupid things if they think there?s a hot girl without a shirt on.
She then went to a florida-esque planet since it was spring break, the other heroes and villains were welcome to join her.

Spoiler: OOC

Yeah this was poorly done but I want to make a joke that's coming up, plus it's march break I can think of a few jokes to be sprung from that little topic

 

[Sam G]

"As a matter of fact, Rihanna dear, I think we're gonna stay down here and battle with the forces of God for Ragnorak's soul. Also, the thing about Metatron..."
"I AM A GOOD CHRISTIAN! I AM PURE OF TEMPTATION!!!" The Voice of God yelled, and stabbed his thumbs into his eyes. Then he transformed into a spaceship again and flew back to Eris; the only problem being, flying with no sense of sight was difficult, and he crashed into a moon and exploded.
"Metatron is dead!" Sam declared, raising his golden drill to the heavens.
"Boss, nooo!" The angels cried, dissolving into golden powder.
"Now then! Onwards, men, to the fair walls of New Jerusalem!" Fenrir howled, and the heroes continued on their their journey.

 

[Ramthundar]

"What an easy victory. Maybe this will be one adventure that will end simple enough." Ram happily commented.

Suddenly, a giant rift of pure doom opened in front of the group of heroes, black specters of the damned fleeting through the giant crack. A tall man with a huge tattoo jumped from the rift, wielding a giant scythe.

"BY THE ORDER OF THE TRUE GOD, YOU WILL NOT PASS!"

"AHH! Please, lower thoust decibel!" cried Sam, stuffing several tissues into his ears.

"Eh, don't mind him, all the mythological warriors are like this" the heroic goat remarked before stepping up to the behemoth Christian.

"Hey there bud, name's Ramthundar, Warrior Goat of Thor. Really like your dedication with the...uh, tattoo [sub](by Thor, is that cloth?Damn those Catholics are crazy)[/sub]. We just on our way to the New Holy City, just need to get our friend's soul back, so if you could kindly step asi-"

"A HERETIC! THEIR IS ONLY ONE TRUE GOD! BLOOD FOR THE BLO-uh, LORD!" Dante screamed, bursting Ram's eardrums while trying to slice the goat's neck.

 

[Pm0n3y]

As the heroes began to attack the guy, Phil kept his ground, staring in awe.

"That's D...Dante Alighieri..." He said to himself.

The angel then ran up to the knight, as giddy and excited as a school girl.

"You made The Divine Comedy! That's my favorite book! Like, of all time! OF ALL TIME!!" Phil said excitedly, jumping up and down.

"Can I have your autograph, Mr. Alighieri?" He asked the famous author.

"WHY, YES YOU CAN SON! IT'S ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE A FAN!" Dante yelled to the angel, making his ears bleed. But at this point, Phil was too starstruck to notice.

The author then promptly signed Phil's shirt before continuing to attack the other heroes.

"Sigh...that's Dante Alighieri...what a cool guy..." Phil said, watching him singlehandedly take on his friends with little trouble.

 

[Ramthundar]

The heroes laid down their mightiest powers (except for Phil, who sat their with eyes so bright with the mirth of having met his hero), with none doing much of anything.

"By Goff, I do believe this scallywag certainly has the upper-hand in this physical conflict, wot?" Sam commented, narrowly dodging a slice from raging Christian writer.

"Indeed, good sir. But I do believe I have conceived an idea which may help our predicament" replied Ram, tipping his fancy new top-hat. Sam adjusted his golden monocle in return.

"Scuse me, old chap. I wish to gain your attention."

"Eh?" Dante turned to the happily smiling Ram.

"I have most unfortunate news for you, old bean. Seems as though someones taken a shot at your dandy work and has done a poor job translating it to a new medium."

"...eh?" came the loud, confused reply.

Ram simply sighed and showed Dante a television screen of Dante's Inferno that Sam was playing.

"What...no, this is not what I meant at all! Why is he so huge?! Why does that worm have such big teeth? Are those tentacles coming out of that woman's....GAAAH!"

Unable to take the horror of having his greatest work so twisted, Dante cast himself back into the pits of hell.

"Good show! I applaud your wonderful prowess of offensive tactics. But I must inquire...what's with the gentleman act?" Sam asked while throwing off his monocle and top-hat.

"No reason. [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/verbose-memes]"

 

[Orinon]

CybeRhianna (who is fused with CybeRyan for now) picked up he monocle
"Hmm i could use this for an obscure reference" putting it in her pocket. So where are you guys going?

 

[ajb924]

Spoiler: Dammit...

Spring break SHOULD mean I have more time to post, but my parents are making me unpack stuff... That's why it's been a while. That, and all free time I've had has been pooled into Higurashi... BUT! Now that I finished the whole series, and Umineko is IMPOSSIBLE to find a torrent of, I'm here to post!

"Alright, so all I need to do is kill you? Then what?" Sho asked Ryan.
"That's up to the ones controlling you!" Ryan said
"Huh?" Sho asked perplexed.
"ALIENS! THEY'RE TAKING OVER OUR MINDS! WHEN WE BLEED MAGGOTS FALL OUT OF OUR SKIN AND THEY DON'T LET YOU DIE BECAUSE THEY'RE ALIENS!!!!" Ryan yelled insanely.
"Uh huh... Well then...... Ummmmm I think you should be killed for your own good..." Sho said looking at Ryan ramble on about mind control and aliens.
Sho began to pull out a large silver revolver when Ryan said "WAIT! IF YOU USE THAT THE ALIENS WILL STOP IT!"
"Then what in the HELL do I kill you with?" Sho asked.
"The aliens only weakness..." Ryan began. "A golfclub."
"Where in fucks sake can I find one of those!? WERE UNDER WATER! You know what? NO." Sho said finally and shot Ryan in the face. "Look at that, straight through the forehead, and no alien maggots coming out of your skin." Sho casually walked out of the room and began looking for the others.

 

[Orinon]

CybeRyan defused with Rhianna he then looked at the dead body of Ryan.
"Mr.Bubbles would you kindly come in here." with that the only surviving big daddy came into the room it was a bouncer model. it carried with it a little sister. "Mr. Bubbles would you kindly hand the child to me." The big Daddy wanted to kill CR but was affected by some genetic experiment that was actually tested on grimn (When no one can say) and grudgingly handed over his little sister.
"Good boy, now littl girl gather Adam from this angel."
The little sister gathered adam and gave it to CybeRyan.

 

[ajb924]

"Dammit!" Sho said as he saw the cybers. He walked up to them and began to explain. "Your not here! Your with the heroes, the ones in rapture are: Xandus's people, Grimm's people, me, and Maddawg. If you want to be here, make some introduction as to how you got here."
"But you said Ryan..." CyberRyan mumbled.
"Yea, because I forgot we had a ************ NAMED Ryan in the RP! I meant ANDREW RYAN." Sho explained. "So, either give me an explanation as to why your here or go back to the heroes!"

 

[Orinon]

ok Explanation time.
CybeRyan was busy looking for some cool way to empower himself. When he heard rumors of an underwater city with a mystical substance that lets you shoot lightning he couldn't resist he dove down and entered Rapture via leak in a closed off area.

 

[Ramthundar]

"Behold, Warriors of the Avatars, it is the Sacred City of the True God...the Holy City of NEW JERUSALEM!" Fenrir declared, spreading his paws to the shining city before the group of heroes.

"WOW! IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL! SO WONDROUS! SO....commercialized?" Phil's shout of awe turned into a confused gasp, having shielded his eyes to see that the glow came not from the city's holy power but from sunlight being reflected off of several buildings, several signs flashing names such as MCDonalds, Walmart, and Starbucks.

"Erm, yeah...Those came in a few years ago. God damn blasphemous, what they did" Fenrir grumbled, taking a sip from his "Starbucks HEAVENLY DELIGHT" frappe-latte.

"Sure, whatever." Ram muttered, then turned to his crew with bright eyes. "My loyal warriors, we have found the legendary city of God! It is here that we will find our dear friend's soul, Rag. I do not expect this to be a easy battle, nor for us to survive unscathed, but I assure you that with me at the helm of this charge, we Will BE VICTOR-"

"Achem!" coughed the giant, mythical wolf, "sorry to cut you short mate, but you're 'loyal warriors' have found the half-off deals at Walmart."

Ram looked with disbelief at his group. "You damn bastards, I was giving a heroic speech here! How dare you run off so you can get a bloody sale-OMG! They got 25% off horn-wax!"

 

[Fury Is Me.]

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[Fury Is Me.]

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[Paksenarrion]

A bland, nondescript, solitary IRS agent on vacation was lounging on the beach in a one-piece swimsuit, reading a book, when a huge wave caused by a soul wave drenched her completely. Spluttering, she adjusts her glasses and walks back to her hotel room. "There's no rest for the wicked." After taking a shower, she packs up her belongings and readies herself for the task of auditing the citizens of Rapture. "I wonder if anyone is still alive..."

The IRS finds everyone.

 

[Pm0n3y]

Meanwhile in the Holy city of New Jerusalem...

As the heroes window-shopped through the seemingly giant Wal-Mart, taking note at low, low prices, Phil occupied himself in the game section, maxing out the scores on every song on the DJ Hero trial.

After finally breaking the turntable controller, Phil decided to find the other heroes, so he could regroup them, and so they continue on their quest.