The Escapist Plays: Civilization V (MOAR PLAYERS PLS)

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lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
Jan 19, 2009
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Can't update, as this site keeps crashing (I have slightly dumb internet). I'll get to it tomorrow, assuming everyone doesn't ditch the site in light of the Extra Credits debacle.
 

Mr Thin

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Apr 4, 2010
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Awwww.

It's not your internet, I've been getting it too; pretty sure it's because of the Extra Credits thing, all the traffic and such.

Besides, nobody's actually going to leave, they haven't got the willpower. The site's too awesome.
 

Bohemian Waltz

Senior Member
Oct 3, 2010
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Mr Thin said:
Awwww.

It's not your internet, I've been getting it too; pretty sure it's because of the Extra Credits thing, all the traffic and such.

Besides, nobody's actually going to leave, they haven't got the willpower. The site's too awesome.
Funny, I haven't experienced any sort of issues.

In any case I'll probably leave short term as I'm attending a business trip soon for a few days and depending on how busy I am I won't be posting. Totally not due to the EC incident, though in case I up an vanish and anyone's inclined to think that.

The EC incident is rather upsetting though.
 

lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
Jan 19, 2009
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The best compromise I can make for the voting is a library followed immediately by a scout. I know that's not what you were going for, Waltz, but what can I do.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397108301/7958FF8BEB3ED8843630F19C3BED9FF4EA62B7BF/

(I also tried to sell off our borders to Elizabeth, but she seemed to think that us giving our borders to them for free was the best choice. No - Can - Do.)

Now we send our scouts a bit south and OH DEAR.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397119528/6D38D5E36CC56A3577903EB29354086D49322C1E/

It seems we have a pest control issue.

Up north, we put the squeeze on those enemy archers!

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397117550/A96DD070745DE47558F2B09E8BA0DE6DD03BD106/

Press them harder!

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397121090/3E55D881931DF4C05808D32B69F9CB1D4E805BA8/

We killed them, but OH DEAR.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397109875/62ECB38558810B221ABFE3EACE9BD9E6E21D4D29/

Scouts are being attacked. More OH DEAR.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397115868/C9487F302B34A84A8EA061525368AAE8AC481C11/

Here's our current status: We have barbarian camps on three sides of us. How do we mobilize our army right now?

Also, our Mohawk Warriors deserve a promotion. Which one?

OH! And before I forget...

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397142082/3781579842FDB4CE5160F2A33B09C193D3EC1A98/

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341397142816/12F66349FDE6D1C7F9394348FDD5EA71FC64E66B/

Our next city: Eumersiania!
 

Bohemian Waltz

Senior Member
Oct 3, 2010
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As for unit promotion. I say go drill for 20% bonus in rough terrain. Shock would mitigate ending a units turn in open terrain, but if we're ending a unit in open terrain near an enemy that can kill it we deserve to have it die.

The prospect of a MW on a forest across a river is too awesome in general. A MW upgraded to drill 3 on a forest defending across a river will actually defeat a rifleman easily, which is no easy task.

My votes:
-Promote our vet to drill 1 and press forward to finish off the barb camp to the north of them. Fighting archers in a forest with Mohawks with drill should be a cakewalk, even if they've taken a little damage.
-Upgrade our warriors in Knackopolis to Mohawk Warriors. Send them West to take care of those mean barbarians that won't stop picking on our scout.
-Send our scout back to Knackopolis to heal up quicker.
-Once the 2nd source of spices are done sell them off to anyone who will buy them; extra sources of a luxury don't provide any benefit. Alexander might actually be a good choice for this.
 

Mr Thin

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We have warriors in Knackopolis? I can't keep track of these things.

Doesn't seem to be any viable alternative beyond what Waltz said. I most certainly want Drill, and those barbarians to the west most certainly need a good thrashing.

I was about to suggest we send archers with them, until I realised that one of the three barbarian units are workers. Can they even fight? At all? In any case, have at them! Mohawk Warriors ahoy!
 

RagnorakTres

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Feb 10, 2009
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I'm with Waltz (yet again).

In terms of that Barbarian Worker, you'll have to capture it (which is as simple as moving a military unit into it's hex). If it was one of our workers, we'll take it. If it isn't, we'll be given a choice, whether to return it to it's original owner or keep it. Return it. It's worth a lot of influence with both major civs and city-states and can even stave off war for 10 turns or more. I always return captured support units...unless, of course, I capture them in the process of destroying a civilization.
 

Grant Allison

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May 2, 2011
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Hello my Lord!

I have come from the far away land of Britain to offer my advice to you on all matters.

I was unfairly kicked out of my homeland after some baseless allegations of incompetence and attempted murder.

After many years I have finally arrived on the shores of your fine nation and seek to help it achieve greatness. Perhaps you could one day repay me by helping get revenge on those who crossed me?

Now judging by the current state of affairs we need to mobilise some forces to take out these savages surrounding us, post haste.

With regards to promotion judging by the rough terrain surrounding our brave warriors, we should give them the appropriate training. Also I think they deserve their own unit name for such diligent service, how about ?The Burning Knives? an inspiring title it is.

Now that we?ve got all that out the way do you think you could call down some servants to help take my things off my boat?

I would do it myself but it appears some violent youths have occupied it in my absence.
 

lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
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I'm not sure how to edit unit names... Also, welcome, dear sir. Your advice shall be kept in the highest esteem, much like the advice from the lobby groups that may or may not be egging my palace right now.

Units - Promoted with Drill.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416872759/393F6E4C48461246C8668C0904F7B9FF0A767A41/

Warriors updated!

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416870262/8936229AE911DFB699A678CE9BF76D6ACD9BE97B/

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416868856/8A20217C7C5F1B3A935BB2204ED4D3C54F7569E8/

Whups. Forgot to check for when that was coming.

Anyways, our units KO the Barbarian camp to the north and meet a new city state!

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416866734/F3DD8AF77B3CF74B441B94676EAB2BAA7EF166FD/

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416867806/7BE5BE3B9D37D39B1073B7B1282A436E741039C5/

Workers by Thinville are done their building for now... they're boing to hide until the nasty barbarians go away.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416874442/152F0701189DC544BC8476A845A5BCA7DA4C27E5/

Scouts are now garrisoned in Knackopolis. Second squad of Mohawks are on their way!

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416864581/6A6CF33EBD6D40815FFF7F546C0097B109089E25/

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341416915420/61937892BF773E0BC2AC4B319A22DFC02EF1E8E7/

What to research now?
 

Bohemian Waltz

Senior Member
Oct 3, 2010
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The WALTZ party is henceforth redefining itself as:
The Whimsical Assembly of Ludicrous Theocratic Zupaysauri

Our platforms now additionally include (but are in no way limited to):
  • -Worship of the great and mighty mouse cursor "may it's clicks guide our actions".
    -Propagation of the belief that the planet is a 2 dimensional and shaped as an open cylinder.
    -Promoting things with no viable alternative.
    -That tiny mammals/marsupials are delicious.
    -Upgrading Mohawk Warriors into Mohawk Warriors.
    -Barbarian Genocide.
    -Spreading the rumor that Genevans eat Iroquois babies and worship Steve Jobs.
    -Replacing the word "build" with "erect".
    -Erecting prolific public erections.
    -Insuring adequate maintenance of our erections.
    -Making sense of hexagonal topography.
    -Constantly redefining itself and making inane lists of policy platforms.

Optics/Compass Tech should be a very low priority. The only Tangible benefit from optics would be the extra food from coastal tiles with a lighthouse in a city. Functionally this only really pays off once coastal cities have 3+ coastal tiles since a granary provides +2 food at the cost of 15 less production. Long term lighthouses are nice, but only become mediocre after a coastal town is above size 4. Optics does open up compass, but the benefits on that are shy of good either. It does allow for harbors which can connect trade routes, but since your capital is landlocked you'll still need a road for most trade routes anyways. Under most circumstances researching optics is a bit of a waste unless you have 3-4 coastal towns that could benefit from lighthouses.

The Great Lighthouse is possibly one of the worst wonders we can conceivably build. It provides an anemic 1 culture/turn and gives a lackluster +1 movement/vis for naval units. The bonus only becomes semi-useful late in the game and doesn't have any effect till you get caravels. On a Pangaea it's pretty much a giant waste of time. The only real positives being a free lighthouse and the 1 culture/1 great merchant point per turn. It dukes it out with both the Pyramids and the Colossus as the bottom 3 wonders of the ancient age.

The Iroquois unique building the Longhouse(replaces workshop), which can be unlocked by researching masonry>construction>metal casting, is unbelievably powerful early/mid-game especially around a ton of forests. It provides +1 production for every forest tile worked and an additional 2 production. It might be worth it deviating from a b-line to chivalry simply to gain access to the building.

As for future settlements I'd suggest to the east just short between the source of wheat and marble along the coast. Possibly south along the river near the possible source of dyes(?). As well as one in that fertile valley with the grasslands/horses/marble.

Did I spy the outlining of a source of dyes on the map far south in the woods near the river and southern-most spices?

My votes:
-Send the western Mohawk Warriors to the hill then strike at the barb encampment.
-Sell off spices when workers done as per usual.
-Check diplomatic relations and see if you can initiate a research agreement with anyone. If possible damn the price and do it.
-Pull the Mohawk warriors back from the North and move them east stopping briefly in Knackopolis to heal up to full strength and continue on to hit that Barb camp to the east and pop the ruins to get the bonus. (hopefully collect on Geneva's mission)
-Research Masonry, it's cheap and easy it also opens up the prospect of putting quarries on any of the many sources of marble. Go mathematics after.
 

Mr Thin

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Apr 4, 2010
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Theology! Most of the options appear pretty useless right now.

Maybe soon I'll get to 'erect' a 'wonder' in my 'city'.

Also, what are the odds our archers in Thinville (wooh!) will succeed at killing those nearby barbarians?
 

Bohemian Waltz

Senior Member
Oct 3, 2010
175
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Mr Thin said:
Also, what are the odds our archers in Thinville (wooh!) will succeed at killing those nearby barbarians?
I think low probability that they'll one shot them with the city also firing off a barrage. I can't see them lasting out against 2 turns of attacks, though. A decent strategy would be to leave the workers slightly out of the barbarians reach in order to goad them into following them and possibly distracting them from any ideas of pillaging our gold. It would buy us enough time to decimate them with archer/city ranged attacks. Risky if done incorrectly, but fun if they take the bait.

Worst case scenario the workers have an improvement to rebuild.
 

Mr Thin

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Apr 4, 2010
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Then let's give that a try! The peaceful intellectualism rampant in this thread sickens us.

Uh, that's 'us' as in the THIN party, not us as in a Smeagol/Gollum "We wants the barbarians dead, precious" kind of way.
 

Grant Allison

New member
May 2, 2011
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My Lord, if I may.

With masonry we could erect mighty walls to protect ourselves; this is important long term planning for when we go to war with the foul and strange Greeks.

If we move our workers north west, they would be in a position where we could withdraw them if they became threatened.

Judging from the maps of the north-west land tendril there appears to be a small chain of islands, is that a wonder? (Centre right of the first screencap.)

Also can we make optics a priority, the violent youths have sailed my boat out to sea and I can?t see what they?re doing on it. I hope it nothing destructive almost everything I own is on that boat. I?m off to drown my sorrows in the taverns, see you later.

(When a unit is promoted a tiny little ?Edit? button appears in the unit promotion bar.)
 

lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
Jan 19, 2009
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Yes, that's a natural wonder. We found it a while ago.

Two for masonry, one for theology. Masonry it shall be.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435981733/A9136011C24FF33E7FBB27667CFD69D6A6828CA6/

Also, the worker-bait-and-switch wasn't necessary - the idiot barbarians WANDERED RIGHT INTO OUR RANGE.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435986103/8B1C6959214DB1644CE73867274F9457E87AF040/

(Ignore the battle stat at the bottom, I forgot to unclick.)

It died. Workers will now move towards the deer.

Up north, we have Dublin blocking our path.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435993196/7D599B33036422D2DB338EE00EC99E28037D33E4/

Out east, we have mild opposition.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435995887/CCBAB1E801578D1CEEFCB6DC1B999163C19568F8/

Scouts have been built in Thinville. They travel north along the Greek border and find the Barbarian camp - abandoned!

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435991167/40A4EA550661737EFD567C6D045C736E72243893/

Well, let's do some more before sending the ballots around. Research agreement with the Incas - initiated.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435989712/FE3316F5D50DE9202A1A37D9E079AFA0D5359AAA/

Now for some trading with the Greeks... brownie points would be nice.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435994702/C273AC51A23C115E0D429D7F5F5BE90ECC5BAF5F/

Hello to you too, Alex!

(Not pictured: initiated research agreement with Greeks as well, sold Spices for 50 gold, the most they'd take.)

Also, our Mohawks to the west have pwned their first opponents.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435983895/1C369FD5E9E582AA2C7B71B1243A58426D44BF6E/

OK, so Thinville needs a project.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/541776341435987804/FA6E634F8D3845B43A37047045D4AB733C75A274/

What to build in Thinville?

Also, our workers down by Knackopolis are done the plantations. What now?

BONUS VOTES FOR THE FUTURE!

In one turn, Masonry is done. What next?

In two turns, the Great Library will be done. What free tech should we take? Also, what should we build next in Knackopolis?
 

NerfedFalcon

Level i Flare!
Mar 23, 2011
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The Leet Party suggests the following course of action:
-If possible, have those non-busy workers near Knackopolis make trade routes (by that, I mean if nobody else is in the way)
-At Thinville, it's take a toss-up between the two available coastal-only wonders: Great Lighthouse and Colossus
-After you finish Masonry...we haven't been reading the tech-tree, so we wouldn't know anything about what to do with that or the Great Library.
-At Knackopolis, I'd focus on filling in any buildings we don't have there yet.
 

Mr Thin

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Apr 4, 2010
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In Civ IV there's a button that, when clicked, floats an icon over every resource on the map, making them much more obvious. Does Civ V have that too? I only ask because although I can clearly see the sheep and horses and such, people have mentioned marble, which I haven't noticed.

If there is no such feature, could you just point out the new resources as we find them? Maybe I'm the only one having this problem, but I'd still appreciate it.

As for what to build in Thinville, I'd say Temple? It's not like we can't afford it, and it would offer a moderate boost to our culture rate. The earlier the better. What's that last building on the list, hidden by the scout message?

No idea what to do with the workers; can't see anything else they can build. Stick them in the city, I suppose.

After Masonry, I change my mind and say Mathematics! Mostly for The Hanging Gardens. I am impatient with our current growth rate. Also, the Courthouse (if I'm reading its effect correctly) sounds like it will come in handy when we conquer Geneva.

After Great Library, I reckon a temple there as well, because I'm loving this whole policy thing Civ V has going, and want MOAR CULTURE! And go Theology for our free tech, because it'll be the most expensive, except for Civil Service which is mostly useless to us anyways.
 

lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
Jan 19, 2009
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Mr Thin said:
And go Theology for our free tech, because it'll be the most expensive, except for Civil Service which is mostly useless to us anyways.
But will it be LATER?

Just don't forget that we will have to research it sooner or later.