The Great Debate - Chunky vs. Smooth

Recommended Videos

Guitarmasterx7

Day Pig
Mar 16, 2009
3,872
0
0
Picture this. You're in your bedroom with 3 russian supermodels. They want you to lick something off them but you're out of whipped cream from the swedish ones last night. You go to a cupboard and find the next best thing: Peanut butter. So you lather them up with it.

Now, russian women are real women. This dainty waxing shit is much more cultural in the west, and there's a bit of bush goin' down there. You make your way down licking the peanut butter off them when suddenly, you realize something is wrong. The smooth paste that made the experience is all gone, but entangled in their shorthairs remain the small chunks of betrayal. Try as you might you can't get to them without a mouthful of pubey floss. After swallowing possibly hundreds of hairs, you realize that they've all fallen asleep and you've spent the last hour and a half picking peanuts out of pubic hair with your teeth.

Anyways that's something I forsee happening to me quite a bit over the next few years, so smooth.
 

Cowabungaa

New member
Feb 10, 2008
10,806
0
0
Casual Shinji said:
I don't like chunky butter, and so I equally despise the chunky peanut variety.

I don't think you can even get chunky peanut butter over here anymore. Calvé; the brand for peanut butter where I live certainly doesn't seem to sell it anymore. Or maybe I'm just blinded by the utterly superior jars of smooth peanut butter lining the shelves.
Mind you, our (vastly superior) Calvé smooth peanut butter is nothing like the smooth American variety, which is, basically, some sort of, well, actual butter. I tried that kind of peanut butter once and it was so so vile. Our smooth is nearly their chunky.

But I'll pass on the actual Calvé chunky. Those big pieces of peanut get stuck between my wisdom teeth and gum and that hurts like a ************.
 

Paragon Fury

The Loud Shadow
Jan 23, 2009
5,161
0
0
Cowabungaa said:
Casual Shinji said:
I don't like chunky butter, and so I equally despise the chunky peanut variety.

I don't think you can even get chunky peanut butter over here anymore. Calvé; the brand for peanut butter where I live certainly doesn't seem to sell it anymore. Or maybe I'm just blinded by the utterly superior jars of smooth peanut butter lining the shelves.
Mind you, our (vastly superior) Calvé smooth peanut butter is nothing like the smooth American variety, which is, basically, some sort of, well, actual butter. I tried that kind of peanut butter once and it was so so vile. Our smooth is nearly their chunky.

But I'll pass on the actual Calvé chunky. Those big pieces of peanut get stuck between my wisdom teeth and gum and that hurts like a ************.
But not as much as getting a piece of popcorn shrapnel stuck in your gums.
 

Ten Foot Bunny

I'm more of a dishwasher girl
Mar 19, 2014
807
0
0
Chunky all the way! I'm not a big fan of peanut butter (or nuts in general) but I love the slight difference in taste between the clumps and the sludge. No chunky? Then hold the PB.

--------------

It's kind of like asking about OJ, which I want served with as much pulp as possible. I want it so solid that you'd think the orange was "squeezed" by a single puny blow with a balsa-wood glider wing.
 

solemnwar

New member
Sep 19, 2010
649
0
0
I used to like chunky, but now I hate it. I'm not sure why. I just prefer smooth now. Maybe because it's easier to spread? idk guys

I rarely eat peanut butter anyways. If I need a snack I go for salads.
 

FPLOON

Your #1 Source for the Dino Porn
Jul 10, 2013
12,531
0
0
lax4life said:
I don't like peanut butter.

....

What?
I was going to say that, at first... Then, I realized I just don't like peanut butter that's NOT covered in jelly...

Then again, it has been YEARS since I've had anything to do with peanut butter to begin with, so there's that...
 

Sandjube

New member
Feb 11, 2011
669
0
0
I simply can't fathom why smooth exists and how people have THAT bad taste in peanut butter. Alas. Chunky.
 

Weaver

Overcaffeinated
Apr 28, 2008
8,977
0
0
I'll gladly eat both, but I have a stronger affinity towards chunky.

I'll concede smooth spreads better, but chunky has the chunks.

I like the chunks.
 

RedDeadFred

Illusions, Michael!
May 13, 2009
4,896
0
0
Chunky all the way. The crunch in a PB&J sandwich elevates it a ridiculously delicious level. It's like eating dessert IMO.

Smooth is good, but chunky is simply superior.