The Guy above me is a troll because...

[TheDoctor455]

... for not being arbitrarily loud enough!

 

[Neonbob]

...for licking my eyeball when I offered to shake your hand!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

For squashing the great sea snake rebellion!

 

[Neonbob]

...for being so damn difficult to squish!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

For expecting me to be only as difficult as a Goomba!

[sub][sub]You don't dare stomp he who has spikes[/sub][/sub]

 

[Neonbob]

...for being a thorny nightmare!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

For not being brave!

 

[Scde2]

For not implementing fast travel!

 

[Neonbob]

...for bugging up all the servers!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

For not apologizing to the snails for what he has done!

 

[Neonbob]

...for licking so many toads that your warts got cancer!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

For sprinkling aforementioned toads with uranium shards!

 

[Neonbob]

...for consuming enough lard to choke a fat man!

 

[XJ-0461]

For nuking all the whales! How will I make my army of stormtrooper whales now?

 

[Neonbob]

...for wanting whales in your army!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

For sending Canada the Double Down!

[sub][sub]Take back that abomination America, we don't need that kind of stuff here.[/sub][/sub]

 

[Scde2]

For unleashing Justin Bieber upon the world!

 

[Neonbob]

...for not shooting him upon release!

 

[Scde2]

For inventing his hair!

 

[Neonbob]

...for overgelling your earwax!