The Guy above me is a troll because...

[Heart of Darkness]

For spending fifteen minutes to save 15% on car insurance by switching to Geico!

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for devouring fruit salad at an alarming rate.

 

[Heart of Darkness]

For being a little hairy...thing.

 

[Neonbob]

...for downloading vile, vile porn onto my hard drive!

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for not sharing the vile, vile porn with the rest of us!

 

[Lazy Kitty]

For not making him share the vile, vile porn!

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for continued use of the phrase "vile, vile porn".

 

[Neonbob]

...for not loving that way that vile, vile porn sounds!

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for not promoting nice, wholesome porn instead.

 

[Heart of Darkness]

For creating a Grandfather Clock paradox!

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for creating a clock out of grandfathers.

 

[Heart of Darkness]

For filling my programs with moths! Moths!!!

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for not appreciating the moths.

[sup]They're delicious![/sup]

 

[Heart of Darkness]

For making me go in and debug everything now!

[sub]Whether or not moths are delicious is a small consequence when I need to manually remove them from the innards of my programs. Have you ever been punctured by a while loop? Shit's not fun.[/sub]

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for complaining so loudly.

[sup]You'll wake the neighbors![/sup]

 

[Heart of Darkness]

For thinking I have no right to complain!

[sub]You are so asking to get stabbed with a floating-point variable![/sub]

 

[Lazy Kitty]

For not continueing the use of the phrase "vile, vile porn"!

 

[Heart of Darkness]

For being so late to the party the stage was torn down and replaced with a knitting convention!

 

[Scde2]

For writing a review on "Two Girls, One Cup"!

 

[Voodoomancer]

...for making me remember that minutes before dinner x(