The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess-- Dropping the Bombshell
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[understatement]I guess you didn't like it much.[/understatement]
Anyway, did you really get annoyed by those train-faced monsters who come out of portals in groups of three? Did you try defeating one before using your AOE attack? That might make it easier. Also I think I was just lucky, but once I managed to defeat all three without the AOE attack.
And Z-targeting? That's one of the things that makes combat work so well! I would recommend that you try Majora's Mask, as it's somewhat shorter, however the core movement controls are the same, people talk in noises translated in text(but hey it is N64) and if you don't appreciate the atmosphere in TP than you probably won't be able to appreciate the best part of MM either.
You seem pretty annoyed at the game, but let me tell you that the reviews weren't lies they just appreciated it differently than you. And I had to laugh at your interpretation of Midna and Link's relationship. Also I think link is a little older than 12. But I could be wrong.
You did get hung up on some minor plot points though. I'm pretty sure that that trying to explain how a mystical force works to that degree would probably prevent me playing Dragon Age: Origins.
Where is your Bioshock review BTW? It could be interesting, since I liked Twilight Princess but didn't like Bioshock.
Anyway, did you really get annoyed by those train-faced monsters who come out of portals in groups of three? Did you try defeating one before using your AOE attack? That might make it easier. Also I think I was just lucky, but once I managed to defeat all three without the AOE attack.
And Z-targeting? That's one of the things that makes combat work so well! I would recommend that you try Majora's Mask, as it's somewhat shorter, however the core movement controls are the same, people talk in noises translated in text(but hey it is N64) and if you don't appreciate the atmosphere in TP than you probably won't be able to appreciate the best part of MM either.
You seem pretty annoyed at the game, but let me tell you that the reviews weren't lies they just appreciated it differently than you. And I had to laugh at your interpretation of Midna and Link's relationship. Also I think link is a little older than 12. But I could be wrong.
You did get hung up on some minor plot points though. I'm pretty sure that that trying to explain how a mystical force works to that degree would probably prevent me playing Dragon Age: Origins.
Where is your Bioshock review BTW? It could be interesting, since I liked Twilight Princess but didn't like Bioshock.
I LOVE Ocarina of Time, Link to the Past, all the handheld Zelda's (minus the DS ones...), Windwaker, and Majora's Mask.
I utterly despised the first 12 hours of TP. I'm at the beginning of Lakebed, and the first part of the game was awful. There was no story, no compelling characters. I like Link as a hero, but he isn't compelling. You had to do the same fetch quest as the same wolf with the same atmosphere with the same fights THREE TIMES? Some of the things you had to find even had self-contained puzzles? I also LOVE the fact that death rewards you with 3 hearts at the entrance to the dungeon. GO FIND YOU OWN HEALTH, EVEN THOUGH YOU OBVIOUSLY HAD ENOUGH TROUBLE TO DIE. This wasn't an issue for me in the other Zelda's, since health was generally easier for me to find...
I'm going to persevere and keep going once I get a new TV. I've heard it gets better, but so far it is nothing close to the quality of OoT/MM/Windwaker/ALttP/etc.
I utterly despised the first 12 hours of TP. I'm at the beginning of Lakebed, and the first part of the game was awful. There was no story, no compelling characters. I like Link as a hero, but he isn't compelling. You had to do the same fetch quest as the same wolf with the same atmosphere with the same fights THREE TIMES? Some of the things you had to find even had self-contained puzzles? I also LOVE the fact that death rewards you with 3 hearts at the entrance to the dungeon. GO FIND YOU OWN HEALTH, EVEN THOUGH YOU OBVIOUSLY HAD ENOUGH TROUBLE TO DIE. This wasn't an issue for me in the other Zelda's, since health was generally easier for me to find...
I'm going to persevere and keep going once I get a new TV. I've heard it gets better, but so far it is nothing close to the quality of OoT/MM/Windwaker/ALttP/etc.
Never said it had to be a literal translation but that it should. Then again that's like saying Anime is ridiculous and people should grow out of it. Some things are impractical.Lucane said:
I don't know how to begin this post. You seem to try to set your personal opinion as the ultimate carved-in-stone fact. Many have compared your style to Yahtzee, but he at least talks about his own experience. Sorry if I misinterpreted, but the whole bit about "the reviewers lying" just gives me no other impression.
I played TP and liked it a lot.
Gah, I was gonna write about the Midna riding Wolf-Link thing, butaödjshoaihdlkasdnolasdghaubj
I feel like I'm talking to a wall.
Which I practically am doing right now.
I played TP and liked it a lot.
Gah, I was gonna write about the Midna riding Wolf-Link thing, butaödjshoaihdlkasdnolasdghaubj
I feel like I'm talking to a wall.
Which I practically am doing right now.
I started reading but just stopped after you started lambasting the fact he turns into a wolf, and the fact that there is "no explanation offered". Actually, there is, and it's offered fairly frequently and fairly thoroughly. You're trying too hard to be controversial, pal. At least Yahtzee does it with penache.
At least Link is actually wearing armor in this game...
Wierd thought, I know, but that always bugged me. Also him being 12, but they finally wisely made the protagonist a teenager for TWP and OOT
Wierd thought, I know, but that always bugged me. Also him being 12, but they finally wisely made the protagonist a teenager for TWP and OOT
Clearly you don't visit many forums. Also, to have 'gamer cred' I couldn't care less what you've played. To write a review and then as an aside throw in your dislike for one of the most formative and well received franchises in gaming history in a desperately transparent attempt to claim "edginess", now that I have a problem with.Taerdin said:
My apologies for digging this up now, my Hard drive fried and I haven't been online since this last post on my own machine.
I'm a fan of zelda, but I would have to agree with your points. I actually played through the whole game though. It gets much MUCH better at the point where you can switch back and forth between link and the wolf and those stupid "kill 15 beetles scattered around this whole area to turn back" shit stops, but that's easily 8-10 hours into the game. Plus the beginning of the game was really fucking long and dull. TP is probably my least favorite zelda game. though if you're willing to put up with it for long enough the game at least redeems itself to the point of average.
The story was really shit in TP. It seems like the best possible script that could come from a fanfiction written by some 15 year old emo kid. Zelda has always had a bit of a simple, cliche story, but it pulled it off. TP tried so hard to be "original" while still keeping the cliche roots of the series, which resulted it a completely absurd and severed plot.
The gameplay on the wii version is shit. The motion control isn't fun because "move wiimote" just substitutes what would be the "b" button. A gamecube version exists and it fixes that problem, though due to the wii version being exceptionally more difficult to control, the difficulty of the actual game had to be scaled back, so the gamecube version is insultingly easy.
I would recommend that you hack your wii or something and download OoT or majora's mask from one of the many Gecko OS forums that exist. They're much better.
The story was really shit in TP. It seems like the best possible script that could come from a fanfiction written by some 15 year old emo kid. Zelda has always had a bit of a simple, cliche story, but it pulled it off. TP tried so hard to be "original" while still keeping the cliche roots of the series, which resulted it a completely absurd and severed plot.
The gameplay on the wii version is shit. The motion control isn't fun because "move wiimote" just substitutes what would be the "b" button. A gamecube version exists and it fixes that problem, though due to the wii version being exceptionally more difficult to control, the difficulty of the actual game had to be scaled back, so the gamecube version is insultingly easy.
I would recommend that you hack your wii or something and download OoT or majora's mask from one of the many Gecko OS forums that exist. They're much better.
I know you probably won't read this but still I need to get this off my chest.
1.He can turn into a wolf because he's got a piece of the Triforce, which is a magic mcguffian by the way, which you wouldn't learn about in LoZ:TP for a while, if I'm not mistaken.
2.You didn't even complete the game? So you complain about plot elements not being solved almost the instant they are brought up? And you review a game without even completing it?
3. It might be just the way you explained it, but your reasoning for Gorden having a personality sounded like you said he has a personality because of other people having personalities.
4.You can"t compare a fantasy adventure game to a sci-fi shooter. Oh wait I forgot the simmilarities. The main characters are mutes. That makes all other differenes moot because of one conveinet similarity. Silly me.
Sorry if this seems like I'm insulting you or anything, by the way.
1.He can turn into a wolf because he's got a piece of the Triforce, which is a magic mcguffian by the way, which you wouldn't learn about in LoZ:TP for a while, if I'm not mistaken.
2.You didn't even complete the game? So you complain about plot elements not being solved almost the instant they are brought up? And you review a game without even completing it?
3. It might be just the way you explained it, but your reasoning for Gorden having a personality sounded like you said he has a personality because of other people having personalities.
4.You can"t compare a fantasy adventure game to a sci-fi shooter. Oh wait I forgot the simmilarities. The main characters are mutes. That makes all other differenes moot because of one conveinet similarity. Silly me.
Sorry if this seems like I'm insulting you or anything, by the way.
It's taken me over a to beat the game, not because it's long or hard, but because its sooooooooooooooooooo fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkkkkiiiiiiiiiing booooooooooooooorrrrrrriiiiinnnnng and irritating that I just have to stop and play something better. I keep going back to it and I will eventually beat it someday, just not now
A DEFENSE OF TWILIGHT PRINCESS.
Twilight Princess was the first zelda game I ever played. I played it as someone who never even actually liked ocarina of time, as a kid (I must of been, what, 14? I can't remember what time the game came out). I don't think I can be accused of nostalgia, or being bought out by nintendo. I liked it a lot.
You play one quarter of the game, then go on a rant tearing into all the games tiny flaws (Who the hell cares why link can turn into a wolf?) before finally- this was what really got me- going "Every other critic who reviewed this game lied to you." Like you're saying
"I am the only one who's opinion is real- everyone else was bought out by nintendo or was full of nostalgia or something. Having played a tiny bit of the game, I am more knowledgable and qualified than EVERYONE ELSE WHO LIKED THE GAME KNEEL TO ME GAMESPOT."
The flaws you go into are such bloody minor things, too. Not even to defend twilight princess, but you spend a paragraph and a half ranting about how some kid forces you to give you his sword so he can rescue his sister, before saying "I'll leave you with that" as if it is now self-evident that every aspect of twilight princess is an irredeemable pile of shit. And... pedophilic/bestialic overtones? Really? Jesus, dude, get your mind out of the gutter.
Yes, sure, story should never be optional, but you're comparing twilight princess to Watchmen, for gods sakes. NOT EVERY STORY HAS TO BE WATCHMEN. Twilight Princess' story is a kids story: it's about a dude who goes on an adventure and gets to transform into an awesome wolf and saves the world and gets the girl and defeats the monster, hooray! Despite the fact that adults obviously play these games a lot, they're made for kids. The story doesn't have to make every character into a deep tortured soul with a backstory the size of a small continent trailing out behind them. The side-characters in the village do not have to reach into you to touch the heart-strings of your very soul with their incredible well-written plight. Jesus.
And the gameplay stuff. LOZ isn't a game about jumping (obviously, or they wouldn't make you jump automatically) or solving puzzles, or fighting dudes. That's just the generic bits within it. It's a game about having an adventure.
What you're doing here is the equivilant of going into a kids show- something about kids who have adventures and save the world, perhaps- and writing a long rant about how the characters were two dimensional and there was no motivation and the outcome was unrealistic and the world didn't make sense, and then complaining about the freudian overtones, and then saying that the kid fans of the show were lying to everyone when they said it was good.
It's not ABOUT that. It's about the child-like sense of wonder with exploring the world and using cool gadgets to get to cool places and fighting giant cool boss dudes and transforming into a super awesome cool wolf. If you go into it acting all cynical about it, then yeah, you won't like it. It's probably pretty stupid, really. It's not mature. It's not well written. It is definetly not watchmen.
But you know, I liked it.
Felt like murdering your father and having sex with your mother lately? I don't think you can blame the pedophilic overtones on anyone but yourself.))
Twilight Princess was the first zelda game I ever played. I played it as someone who never even actually liked ocarina of time, as a kid (I must of been, what, 14? I can't remember what time the game came out). I don't think I can be accused of nostalgia, or being bought out by nintendo. I liked it a lot.
You play one quarter of the game, then go on a rant tearing into all the games tiny flaws (Who the hell cares why link can turn into a wolf?) before finally- this was what really got me- going "Every other critic who reviewed this game lied to you." Like you're saying
"I am the only one who's opinion is real- everyone else was bought out by nintendo or was full of nostalgia or something. Having played a tiny bit of the game, I am more knowledgable and qualified than EVERYONE ELSE WHO LIKED THE GAME KNEEL TO ME GAMESPOT."
The flaws you go into are such bloody minor things, too. Not even to defend twilight princess, but you spend a paragraph and a half ranting about how some kid forces you to give you his sword so he can rescue his sister, before saying "I'll leave you with that" as if it is now self-evident that every aspect of twilight princess is an irredeemable pile of shit. And... pedophilic/bestialic overtones? Really? Jesus, dude, get your mind out of the gutter.
Yes, sure, story should never be optional, but you're comparing twilight princess to Watchmen, for gods sakes. NOT EVERY STORY HAS TO BE WATCHMEN. Twilight Princess' story is a kids story: it's about a dude who goes on an adventure and gets to transform into an awesome wolf and saves the world and gets the girl and defeats the monster, hooray! Despite the fact that adults obviously play these games a lot, they're made for kids. The story doesn't have to make every character into a deep tortured soul with a backstory the size of a small continent trailing out behind them. The side-characters in the village do not have to reach into you to touch the heart-strings of your very soul with their incredible well-written plight. Jesus.
Yes, you are: the point.
And the gameplay stuff. LOZ isn't a game about jumping (obviously, or they wouldn't make you jump automatically) or solving puzzles, or fighting dudes. That's just the generic bits within it. It's a game about having an adventure.
What you're doing here is the equivilant of going into a kids show- something about kids who have adventures and save the world, perhaps- and writing a long rant about how the characters were two dimensional and there was no motivation and the outcome was unrealistic and the world didn't make sense, and then complaining about the freudian overtones, and then saying that the kid fans of the show were lying to everyone when they said it was good.
It's not ABOUT that. It's about the child-like sense of wonder with exploring the world and using cool gadgets to get to cool places and fighting giant cool boss dudes and transforming into a super awesome cool wolf. If you go into it acting all cynical about it, then yeah, you won't like it. It's probably pretty stupid, really. It's not mature. It's not well written. It is definetly not watchmen.
But you know, I liked it.
((Freud was full of shit, dude. Famously so.
Felt like murdering your father and having sex with your mother lately? I don't think you can blame the pedophilic overtones on anyone but yourself.))
[HEADING=1]OBJECTION!!![/HEADING] [http://objection.mrdictionary.net/go.php?n=3622920]jthm said:
*slams hands on desk and extends pointer finger*
This statement clearly contradicts your earlier testimony!
It's one thing to state a clearly ridiculous and laughable thing, its another to pretend you never actually said such a thing. Only a foolishly foolhardy fool would try to foolishly fool me with such foolishly foolhardy foolery!jthm said:
... sorry I've been playing a lot of Ace Attorney lately...