The lies you were told as a child.

[Master Kuja]

Oh not by much, only about half an hour since the last post, at least it's not been...Months.
I like this thread myself, it's nice to see what other lies people have been told.

-Goes hunting for my Book of the Dead.-

 

[Varchld]

I used to chew my hair when I was younger, and my dad told me if I didn't stop it, I'd choke to death XD
Maybe he just had issues...

Maybe he was actually threatening you :O


My brother was told that Sugar Ants were named as such because they tasted like sugar...didn't take long for him to find out they don't.

 

[Magnetic2]

two words, "Radiator Monster", holy crap did that one get me.

 

[Di22y]

my parents-when we was young we had nothing
me-shutthefuckup (zpstyle)

 

[xitel]

I know most parents tell their kids about Santa and the Tooth Fairy, but my parents went AL out, and came up with really complex stuff about them. For Santa, one White Christmas, my Dad put powdered sugar on the bottom of his snow boots and walked them from the fireplace to the tree and back. The one time he forgot to switch out my tooth for the dollar, so the next night he had me put it back, and he left a dollar with a note saying that she had been at a Christmas party (yes, my tooth fell out on Christmas) and lost track of time, so she had to get a ride back home with Rudolph.

 

[Clov3r]

That god saw everything and that people in Heaven looked down on us.

because of that... this happened.

I seriously, could not pee as a child because I was so afraid god and my dead relatives were watching. Eventually at the age of 5 I was hospitalized for a Urinary Tract Infection - because I was too afraid to pee. ahahaha, oh man... it was actually quite terrible.

 

[Clov3r]

The one time he forgot to switch out my tooth for the dollar, so the next night he had me put it back, and he left a dollar with a note saying that she had been at a Christmas party (yes, my tooth fell out on Christmas) and lost track of time, so she had to get a ride back home with Rudolph.

ahaha, that's priceless!!

My father was the tooth fairy, too. He wrote in big fancy curly writing and everything.

 

[EeveeElectro]

The one time he forgot to switch out my tooth for the dollar, so the next night he had me put it back, and he left a dollar with a note saying that she had been at a Christmas party (yes, my tooth fell out on Christmas) and lost track of time, so she had to get a ride back home with Rudolph.

ahaha, that's priceless!!

My father was the tooth fairy, too. He wrote in big fancy curly writing and everything.

I remember my dad coming into my room, putting a hand under my pillow and taking the tooth out. That's when I stopped believing in her, but one time a tooth fell out and I didn't tell anyone, but I still got my pound! Maybe she is real!

As for Santa, I stopped believing in him when I found the carrot we had left out for Rudolph in the pantry.
I cried so much. XD
I still say I do as a joke; last year, I put a mince pie on a plate and left a note saying, "Dear Santa. Here is a mince pie for you. PS, I need a new phone =]"
I'm doing it again this year, I need a new camera

 

[sirdanrhodes]

"Don't worry, we were only kidding, that word is a bad word"

 

[Tartarga]

that mummy loves me.........

i have a similar one
that dad loves me, how could i be so stupid

 

[NeedAUserName]

Santa wasn't real. Its all lie's I tell's ya!, LIES!

 

[Hoppetussa]

When I was 5 or something, my brothers told I was a robot. They kept on convincing me I was a robot for almost a year.

 

[Arachon]

That "if you don't do your studies, you won't get a job"

Oh, and "when you grow up, there will be laws and rules EVERYONE must follow"... so much for equality before the law...

 

[RebelRising]

Christianity. 'Nuff said.

God loves you.

I was told that bridges' weight capacities were measured by successively heavier trucks until it broke, then rebuilt.

Wasn't that a joke in a Calvin & Hobbes strip?

Anyway, that if I read in the dark, I would go blind.

 

[Squeaksx]

That there was this all powerful benevolent being called god. That was a pretty big one.

Heh, it fills my heart with joy to see that within two posts...Eh I guess I'm a rare species. Well I was told that vampires existed by my Grandpa and it literally had me afraid of the dark for over six years.

 

[SmugFrog]

When I was 5 or something, my brothers told I was a robot. They kept on convincing me I was a robot for almost a year.

You know, that reminds me of the part on A.I. where his face freaks out when his "brother" tempts him to eat... I think that would scare the hell out of any kid.