There is a big Turkey Preventing me from getting to my car for lunch!

[Vash108]

It keeps pacing around my car and gobbling at me. It wont let me near it!
What should I do? Should I attack? Or try and distract it to run by and get in?
I think it can smell my fear.

 

[link141]

Well you don't have to go out for lunch,it's right outside.

 

[Icecoldcynic]

I really don't know what to say other than LMFAO. I wish I could believe this was legit, I really do.

EDIT: On a serious note, if it does go for you, punch it right in the face. With luck, it'll get knocked out and you'll be safe.

 

[Hazy]

You were close enough to get a picture, right?

1. Sprint past it when it's on the opposite end of the car
2. Open car door
3. Lunch time

Assuming this is true, that is.

 

[Beefcakes]

Let a lion loose, that will kill the Turkey!
Then you'll be able to get to your car!
My plan. It is fool proof.

 

[Archeopterix]

Just walk past it and ignore it, don'tt go on the grass maybe it decided the grass is it's awesome battleship. If it comes at you (this sounds funny but) make direct eye contact, bare your teeth, put your hands up like claws and hiss at it. That's animal-talk for "get lost".

 

[Smagmuck_]

You've found your lunch. No need to get to the car. >

 

[Doomsday11]

dance...then burn it with fire that always works for me

 

[Toriver]

Try just running towards it yelling and waving your arms. That should probably scare it away long enough to at least get in the door. Turkeys aren't exactly aggressive. It'll likely try to run away instead of actually take you on. Turn the ignition, and the thing should be freaked out enough to just stay away.

 

[PedroSteckecilo]

Go for your car, if the Turkey comes at you, drop kick the feathery bastard in the neck! If it worked for Girlfriend when she was 12 I'm sure it will work for you. Still, Turkey's are mean birds.

 

[MurderousToaster]

*cough*

Need I say more?

 

[Shockolate]

Hah. I went on a class field trip earlier this year around october to a park-place thing, and as we were touring, our class found this turkey. We all kind of looked at it a bit, scared it off, but it started following us all the way back. It actually flipped out on me twice for unknown reasons. I was at the back of the group and probably got closer to it than anyone, but it only flipped out after I left it alone. It wanted attention maybe?

Oddly enough, I haven't gone back to school since.

 

[Jack and Calumon]

This wins the "WTF?" thread award!

OT: Show no fear and don't back down! Make yourself intimidating, and scare it.

Calumon: Better idea. Find out why a turkey is in a car park.

 

[Distorted Stu]

JESUS CHRIST ITS A TURKEY. AVOID THE CAR.
Im pretty sure the only way to counter act this problem is to get a lion from somewhere.

 

[Nimbus]

I believe this is what we call "Turkey sandwich time".

 

[MalevolentJim]

By far the strangest thread I've ever seen.
I'd suggest you attack it with a louder noise.Example,a Chainsaw!

 

[Beardon65]

Wait. So I had to camoflauge myself, be as silent as a church mouse, stand still for half an hour, ticks bite me and I still don't catch a turkey? There's one right in front of you! People get all the luck.

 

[ThaBenMan]

Just yell at it and wave your arms. That'll probably scare it off.

 

[Davrel]

If it attacks you, kick the fucker in the face.

Natural selection.

 

[TheZapper]

Depends. How fast does the Turkey look?