Transformers; Sorry, you're not cool enough for us.

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

Optimus Prime surveyed the assembled Autobots standing before him.
"Megatron has hijacked several oil platforms in the South China Sea, he is forcing the workers to make Energon for him. We must save the humans and destroy his production facilities."
Prime turns his head and looks you directly in the optics;
"I'm sorry , but your ability to transform in to a will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."
Optimus returns his gaze to the assembled troops.
"Autobots, transform and rollout!"

***

All you have to do is think up a name and alt form for all but useless Transformers. The ones that weren't cool enough to hang out with Prime and the gang.

Name: Reggie
Alt form: Cash register

 

[BlazeRaider]

"I'm sorry Landing Strip, but your ability to transform in to a Mobile Stripper Truck will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."


I actually saw one of those at Anime North. Didn't use it, but it was awesome knowing it was there.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

"I'm sorry Bullpup, but your ability to transform into a Milking parlour will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Doclector]

"I'm sorry Cool Rodent, but your ability to transform into a small mickey mouse themed fan will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Scarim Coral]

"I'm sorry Sharp Edge, but you ability to transform into a box will be of no help to us on this mession. You will gave to remain behind."

 

[Able Seacat]

"I'm sorry Fanboy, but your ability to transform in to a raging asshole will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Racecarlock]

"I'm sorry metaphor, but your ability to turn into a symbol of the existential crisis of mankind will be of no help to us on this mission. You'll have to remain behind."

 

[Frezzato]

I refuse to conform to the response format of this thread because I am rebel scum. But the name of my Transformer?

CalculaTOR

Ooh, here's a great bot form for him:

Spoiler: CalculaTOR

 

[MetalDooley]

"I'm sorry Skidmark,but your ability to transform into a soiled pair of Y-fronts will be of no help to us on this mission.You will have to remain behind"

 

[ISearchForTraps]

"I'm sorry Saltshaker, but your ability to transform into a Pretzel Cart will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Treeinthewoods]

"I'm sorry Obsoleto but your ability to transform into an HD-DVD player will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[lacktheknack]

"I'm sorry Bizznitch, but your ability to transform in to an adorable two-foot robot puppy will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Fijiman]

I'm pretty sure this should be moved to the Forum Games, but I'll leave that for the mods and OP to decide.

OT: "I'm sorry Mooseinator, but your ability to transform in to a large waffle cone will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Diddy_Mao]

I'm sorry Hotshot your ability to...um...nah just buzz off Hotshot. Go hang out with Seaspray, Wheelie and Daniel.

 

[MeChaNiZ3D]

"I'm sorry Strong Arm, but your ability to transform in to a bicycle will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Ragsnstitches]

"I'm sorry Duke, but your ability to turn into a pair of steel balls will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Sandjube]

"I'm sorry Grouphug, but your ability to turn into a giant, industrial strength magnet will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[Leemaster777]

"I'm sorry Blaster, but your ability to transform in to a Boom Box will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

Ha, just kidding. Okay, what about:

"I'm sorry Reflector, but your ability to transform in to a camera will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

Ha ha, gotcha again. Okay, okay, for reals this time:

"I'm sorry Ejector, but your ability to transform in to a toaster will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

Bwahaha... I don't have to make these jokes. Transformers already made them for me!

(PS, yes, there really is a Transformer named Ejector. Yes, his alt-mode really is a toaster. Observe

Spoiler

 

[Drake Barrow]

"I'm sorry, Ultraglide, but your ability to transform into a industrial lubricator will be of no help to us on this mission. You will have to remain behind."

 

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

It now occurs to me that there are a lot of E-List Transformers.