bioshockedcriticjrr said:
so this thread has inspired me to write a story about a transexual. So, how do I say this without coming off as a deursche. I'll just ask: Have you dated someone, and when they learned about your... condition... they broke up with you? And if so what were their reaction.
Well first of all, before you write this story, let me ask, have you ever stood in the perspective of a transgender person? Do you think you're ever close to comprehending self-loathing to the extent that the worst thing to happen to you literally was being born? If not, I don't recommend you write it, or at least, not from the perspective of a transgender person. Write it from the perspective of something you know, otherwise its disrespectful to the subject matter, no matter what the subject matter is, and probably spreads misconception and misinformation.
That being said, I don't date, and I can't tell you about my personal reaction, but I think anybody with the ability to empathize knows answer already. Outing yourself, or worse, being outed, is something that is feared, especially for transwomen (thats male-to-female transition) because of the rate of violence. For many people, finding out that they've had sexual relations with a transgender person is as bad, if not worse, than having had sex with an HIV positive person. There are actually people like that, really. Men in particular are more prone to react violently, so relationships often turn into this vicious scenario when however it plays out, you're going to lose. You either lose out on a meaningful relationship you desire with a person, or you get heartbroken when it ends, not to mention the threat to your social status by your outing, and your physical well-being. The person who said "it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all" never was in a position like this, I can tell you that much.
