Use whatever is in the room you're in right now to defend yourself.

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SckizoBoy

Ineptly Chaotic
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Jan 6, 2011
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A Hermit's Cave
Hmmm, my guns don't have no ammo (this is England...) :(

Oh well, uh, a Chinese sabre, a Han-dynasty jian, a Tang-dynasty jian, three bokuto's, a nihonto, a jo, a ninjutsu-ken... and my BARE FUCKING FISTS!
 

teh_Canape

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May 18, 2010
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I have two butterfly knives in my desk's drawers

for some reason I'm not quite sure I'll ever understand



it's official, Captcha has gone completely batshit
 

GundamSentinel

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Aug 23, 2009
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I've got a longsword and a dagger hanging from the wall, and a longbow behind my couch. I'll be okay.
 
Aug 25, 2009
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Lots of knives wthin reach, three very heavy guitars, two heavy amps which I can lift and throw with ease, a couple of easily loaded metal BB Guns, which would at least cause a distraction and irritation.

I'm pretty well off, but even then I'd probably just out the window and run, unless my family were in the building as well. I live on the ground floor so it's very easy to just get out.
 

Heronblade

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Apr 12, 2011
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There's a long hunting/survival knife and a well used machete on the shelf by my head. Even if I can't make it to the shotgun locked up in the basement I think I have the intimidation factor going. Then there's the paintball gun under the bed with paintballs I should have thrown out some time ago. They've hardened and are about as soft as rocks, could probably knock someone out with the suckers if I ramp up the PSI.
 

Chaza

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Dec 15, 2010
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I have a bb pistol made out of metal which would hurt if I hit someone with.
Or my guitar.. But I'd rather not smash my guitar though. Due to it being rather expensive. And some where in my room is a pen knife but it would take me a while to find it.
 

SckizoBoy

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Jan 6, 2011
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A Hermit's Cave
teh_Canape said:
I have two butterfly knives in my desk's drawers

for some reason I'm not quite sure I'll ever understand



it's official, Captcha has gone completely batshit
To the first bit... 'cos you think they're pretty, perhaps. I personally have never seen the appeal of butterfly knives (for some reason they lack elegance, but this coming from someone who looks for a particular aesthete, that would hardly be a surprise, though the irony is that I do Thai boxing... *shrug*).

And to the second bit... it looks like a fucked up integral equation...
 

Jodah

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Aug 2, 2008
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I have two handguns, my hunting knife, and hatchet within reach. I have a feeling I'm okay...
 

Hungry Donner

Henchman
Mar 19, 2009
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It's a shame I didn't see this thread earlier, I had an unhappy screaming five-year old in the room with me, no burglar would have dared enter the house!
 

alexxcodered

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Feb 3, 2011
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theres my knife which is currently leaning against the key board, theres the axe which is by my computer cabinet. and theres a few shards of glass on the top of the cavinet as i dropped a glass aaaaaaaaaaages ago and cant be arsed to clean it up.
im set
 

Terrifying beans

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Aug 29, 2010
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Why do so many Escapists have weapons? I know it's perfectly within your rights to have them, but honestly why would you want something that's designed to injure or kill someone? I just don't understand. Anywho I have a rubbishy 3/4 size kids acoustic guitar still in my room next to my proper one, so I guess I'd reach for that, to look like I know what I'm doing.
 

SilentCom

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Mar 14, 2011
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I don't have any weapons in my room, but I can go for makeshift. I could use the scissors on my shelf, the wire from my speakers, or a book or something weighty to hurl at them.
 

Gunner 51

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Jun 21, 2009
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Never mind using what's on my desk, I have a perfectly good Staffordshire Bull Terrier with a bad attitude to defend me.
 

Aesthetical Quietus

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Mar 4, 2009
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I got my fists, fucking bring it!

Other than that, Tweezers to the first guys eyes, depending on the closeness of the guys, possible a slam into the tweezers to drive them home, a steel toe cap to the next guys balls followed by a few punches to either his head or the next few guys heads. They'll probably get me but I'd go down fighting and they'd certainly regret it and the commotion would wake up dad and he has an Airsoft gun that is a liiiiitle overpowered and about a hundred pellets in that drawer alone. If I had a little more time I'd probably fashion something out of the various computer bits or just go and grab one of the five machetes among other nasty things floating around in the garage.
 

Nimbus

Token Irish Guy
Oct 22, 2008
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A huge ass bastard sword.

Those burglars would be running for their lives.
 

Ch@Z

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Oct 18, 2009
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Why do so many people have swords?
I have a canteen in my room with a strap so I can use it like a mace.
 

Reishadowen

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Mar 18, 2011
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Technically, I think most burglars would flee if they saw someone home, unless they were either armed, or stupid. So, I guess if he was armed, like, with a gun, I'm screwed. If he has a knife, maybe I could resist. So let's see here.

Uhm, I'd probably take either this glass drinking bottle of strawberry soda here and chuck it at them, (resulting carpet stains be damned) or grab my golden N64 controller (it's the only one with it's cord unraveled right now. And who cares about a collector's item when your life is on the line?) and start going Vampire-Killer style on the burglar, and hope he simply decides it's not worth the fight and runs.

I have a replica katana in my room(not much, but it will still do damage, and they don't know it's not authentic, right?), but realistically, I wouldn't be able to get to it and unsheathed in time unless I had about a five seconds heads-up. Though I suppose I could kick my chair into the intruder's way to hinder him for a few seconds, MAYBE buying myself enough time. Since I have a big room with not much in it I could probably use it to it's fullest advantage.

CrazyCapnMorgan said:
Hmmm, eighteen swords of varying descriptions (my most favorite being the two-handed devilish bastard sword), a crescent hand axe, a lamp, a craptastic ton of Heroclix, thousands upon thousands of collectible trading cards, 2 lighters, 2 stuffed teddy bears and a bottle of lube.

I think I'm well prepared.
I don't suppose you've seen the trailer fight in "Kill Bill part 2", have you? Is the room you are in big and open enough for you to actually USE those weapons? A two-handed sword won't do you much good if it gets stuck in the wall on the first swing...unless you're trying to make your opponents laugh themselves to death.

Sniper Team 4 said:
I have a bow and a full quiver of arrows sitting next to me. Not kidding. Also, stapler, pens, pencils, speaker, cables, radio...pretty much anything can be a weapon if used the correct way.
Bow and arrows. Nice, I imagine that would be very effective if the burglars were pegasus knights. However, inside your house, and only a room or two away, most people would probably panic, and with the adrenaline rush, rather go for a "whacking" weapon to take advantage of it. A bow and arrow would require far too much concentration and cool-headed-ness, not something likely to have unless this sort of thing happens to you every other week.