Useless team mates

[SinisterGehe]

I think worse ream mates compered to people like that are the people I meet on Europe West on DOTA2.

Russians who will not communicate unless you speak Russian, sometimes they start speaking English then they see another Russian and ignore everyone else... Sometimes I have even been reporting from verbal abuse because I didn't speak Russian!

And this is when Russians got their own servers!!! Yet they spawn like weeds on every region... I queued on US West (All the way from Finland) and I still got 3 Russians on my team. Also, they apparently got this idea that if someone doesn't understand crylirics spamming them in caps would help.
Also few times they have totally discriminated me, gone around in team of 4 and using their abilities to CC me! THEIR TEAMMATE to kill me and report me for feeding. . . Because I don't speak Russian...

I am all OK with Russians, but 9/10 times they are not O.K with me. Hell... 2 of my cousins are officially Russian (granted I do use them to translate witty insults for me...)

I am not saying all bad teammates are from Russian. I have just met so much of them that it almost seems like that... Because all the English speakers seem to be happy to see another English speaker in-game so much that they are pleasantly suprised and nice.

But in TF2 I have had medics who only pair with the same heavy, tho I play on servers in which Uber stacking on same player constantly is reportable offense and Admins don't like it at all.

And that is quite much all the multiplayers I play

 

[Beautiful End]

Left 4 Dead 2 is pretty spectacular for this, since the most important trait is map knowledge. It's quite obvious when someone is new to a map.

I was playing the Hard Rain campaign recently, and since it's a hard ************, I'm not that familiar with it. My team was making the return trip through the sugar mill and one of my teammates figured it would be a good idea to run ahead while were fighting the tank (pretty much The Incredible Hulk in zombie form). Needless to say, he got grabbed and beaten to death by zombies, after which he started swearing at my team from beyond the grave.

(We didn't win that game.)

Ninja'd! Damn. Oh, well.

The only time I'm okay with people running ahead of me is:

1. If we're playing Versus and things are looking bad for us.
2. If I'm down and overwhelmed, also on Versus.
3. If we're close to the safe house.
4. If we've already restarted the chapter and we just wanna get it over with.

Once we were playing The Parish on a harder difficulty. It was just another guy and me left crossing the bridge finale; everyone else was dead. This other guy had a knack for letting us die in order to run to the safe house, which like I said, I understand, I guess. Zombies were overwhelming us and a Tank was right behind us. We could the helicopter already when my teammate went down. I was very weak but still tried to help him but if I kept trying to get him up (To no avail), the zombies and the Tank would overwhelm me too. So I did what he would do: I ran toward the helicopter.
So what happened? I didn't even make it to the helicopter. I got kicked out. I always try to be the best teammate, really. I was a good teammate but I guess they failed to see that. If I had being overwhelmed, the other guy would have left me behind for sure. But I think he was playing with his buddies so...yeah. Majority of votes.

The game is great if you manage to find good teammates. I mean, the game encourages you to play as a team and look out after one another. It literally rewards you. But when you're paired up with bad teammates...oh boy, you end up hating the game.

People who run ahead, who don't know where to go, who don't know how to play, people who will attack you instead, people who kick you out for no reason (literally), people who are selfish with their items, etc.
One thing I hate is playing with people who are playing together offline, that is, a single account and two players. For the most part, they only look after each other and they stick together. And if there's time, they might look after someone else. Not only that but they have a bigger vote power. They can easily kick everyone out if they want to.

But like I said, if you find good teammates, the game is great, especially on Versus where your actions kick the other team's butt.

In a match earlier that day, I was playing Dark Carnival, and we were in the tunnel of love. I got mobbed by zombies along the way, and as we're nearing the maintenance room, one of my teammates incaps me since he's using the least accurate shotgun in the game. I ***** at him a bit, and I figure it's just one of those things, right? So as we get to the maintenance room, I take a moment to heal (my team was pretty bad, and only one other person had a health kit by that point).

I try to heal, and the fucknut who incapped me shoots me again, like five times. I get incapped for the second time. At this point, I'm thinking "Okay, he's deciding to be a dick. Whatever."

I get up, heal again.

He teamkills me, then picks up my health kit and uses it while his health is in the thirties.

I try to kick him, since, y'know, teamkilling is teamkilling.

The other people on my team don't kick him.

I ragequit.

Yeah, I'm not sure why people keep doing that; ganging against others and shooting them just for shits and giggles, I guess. I run into people like that all the time. They're just trolling.
The other day, I was playing Blood Harvest with some guys. We all stepped out of the safe house, all of us with good health and a health pack. The other guys ran into a mob and pretty much got almost killed. They used their health pack but they still got almost killed. I kept my distance and watched out for special Infected (You know, sound cues or fast movement). So I was on orange health and still with a health pack. So one of the other guys starts shoving me (We didn't have headsets). I move away but he keeps at it. I assume he wants me to heal him, to which I replied with a mental "Ha! I am not wasting my health pack on you! You already spent yours and you're not being a good teammate anyway!".

So he starts shooting me, trying to kill him. I run ahead, trying to escape from him. By now, it's pretty obvious he's trying to kill me.

So what happens? They kick me out! me, the only person who was playing correctly and kinda kept them alive.

I dunno, sometimes, bad people just gang against good players. :l

 

[Mordekaien]

I am one of those useless team mates, when it comes to MOBA genre. I like the concept, I occasionally play them and I do suck at them big time. It's gotten better now, but quite frankly, I'm still pretty terrible.
So most of my stories would be from the other side of the spectrum, how my teammates are screaming at me for my incompetence.
I guess I'm just not one to judge other people in my team. Even though some get on my nerves in Savage 2, and I still suck at that game too.

 

[uchytjes]

Planetside 2 - anyone who really can't control an aircraft or vehicle.

There is nothing worse than being flipped over by an aircraft of your own faction colliding with you and either killing you outright or flipping you over and spinning you out of control near a structure.

Or, tank drivers who run you over because they simply aren't watching who is healing them (I play as Eng a lot) during pushes on bases. They freak out and panic when they take a single hit and try to reverse or drive erratically - often crashing into other tanks or vehicles causing a logjam, or running down friendly troops.

People who don't hang around after a cap on a base and just high tail out onto the next objective. They don't even hang around long enough to clear out the last enemy defenders, who just cap the point back after killing any fool who stays longer than the absolute minimum time necessary to cap the base.

You see? This is why I play solo infiltrator and try to cause chaos to the enemy rather than trying (and failing) at piloting any aircraft. I don't know why but the controls just seem off to me. Also, if I ever do take part in an assault I always take a backseat during travel, either gunning or just riding along.

 

[MPerce]

Halo 4 has the worst teammates I have yet to encounter in any video game, and that's pretty big considering I've been playing since the NES.

You take the vehicle they want? They plasma pistol you and throw grenades.

You take the sniper that spawns? They squat in front of you and jump around like a moron.

They'll keep doing all this till the end of the game, to. Every single stereotype about Halo players is true, I don't even see this level of asshattery in CoD or Gears.

That's only happened a few times for me. Since power weapons come in ordinances now, I haven't run into that particular breed of asshattery near as much as in past games. You've got some bad luck, chum.

But yeah, it's a pain in the ass to have crap teammates in Halo, especially if you're playing a team that's good. By the time you've gotten ahold of a power weapon, the other team will be up by 20 because your guys keep running out in the open and getting team shot.

I never play unless I have people I know on my team. Doesn't even matter if they suck. As long as I can communicate with them, we can usually scrape out a win.

 

[WouldYouKindly]

World of Tanks is full of spectacular stupidity... or just people having a bad game.

Most tank lines have their hat, if you will. German heavy tanks tend to be slow, but with very accurate guns. Russian heavy tanks have very damaging, but inaccurate guns. Which tanks should be sitting in the second line, supporting the advance force? You'd say the Germans, but I've met so many Russian tank drivers who sit back and miss long range shots when that's not what their tanks are good for.

Then there are the suiscouts. Most of these people have tier 5 light tanks, which are very good at their jobs at helping artillery find targets to massacre. So instead of waiting for artillery to get in position and aimed, they charge off instantly to get massacred by the enemy team while not helping anyone.

Finally, there are artillery who take chances with your life. Let's say you're in face hug range, you are literally staring down the barrel of an enemy tank. Then artillery comes in with a shell that half kills you, froma friendly tank. No kind of tank is free from the morons

 

[Skullpanda]

Other Planetside 2 examples that I've dealt with:

-The medic that always tries to revive every single dead body instead of shooting back at the enemy.
-Anyone who parks a Sunderer underneath the Bio Labs instead of at useful spawn locations.
-The light assault that refuses to move up, continuing to camp an area that was captured quite a while ago because (and I quote) "This is a killer spot, nobody looks up here"
-Anyone past battle rank 2 who teamkills for no reason.
-The entirety of Command chat. (Bit of advice for those who play the game: Only ever spend the 100 certs to get this if you've completely finished everything else first. There's no point to it)
-Liberator pilots who think they can dogfight effectively with Reavers/Mosquitos/Scythes
-Those who think the flash is anything more than a quick, cheap, single person transport
-Heavy assaults that use the rocket launcher in close quarters firefights
-Engineers that think the Mako turret solves every problem. Including 5 heavy tanks rolling over a hill
-People who drop pod their own allied aircraft
-The entirety of the zerg, especially when they move on before completely capturing a continent.
-The dead silence in a squad that doesn't use the in-game voice or text chat
-Infiltrators that try to take out MAX suits in close combat
-Anybody who just sits around and doesn't help cap the point, even when it's sitting at 1/6

That's all for me for now...but I know I've probably showed up for at least 1 of these. And I do have more...I just can't remember any right now.

 

[Candidus]

Dota 2 player here. I'm a high or very high MMR player, but that doesn't actually mean a great deal.

I can last hit and deny exceptionally well, I'm excellent about warding, I'm fast thinking and acting, capable of mad tango escapes and getting the most out of heroes with 4-5 ability keys and several active items besides. But high or very high MMR doesn't actually mean anything because it isn't a guarantee of any of that. Bad players can and often do reach high MMR after a run of just 6-7 clean wins, and some of them get as far as very high before they find themselves matchmade to a team not capable of dragging them further upward.

Bottle first Crystal Maiden.
That guy who last picks Riki just before the horn sounds and minions spawn, then tries to push Nightstalker out of mid.
The Axe who finishes a game 0/0/0 with 303 gold per minute, never once leaving the jungle to support our pushing lineup.
BOTTLE FIRST CRYSTAL MAIDEN.
The Invoker who only invokes flamestrike, and never lands one.

And many more. So. Many.

 

[IgnisInCaelum]

Oh, woe, the randoms... ME3, BF3, PS2, whatever you like, they're blind and more tactically stupid than fence posts. My number one rule of random teammates is to never, EVER trust them for anything. If six of them run through a room, don't consider it cleared. If you see that three guys are camping one doorway, don't expect anyone to even shoot at the guy who's gonna pop through it and kill you. Don't even expect them to die first if they're touching enemies who're rather far from you: the enemies are idiots too and may well gun you down while ignoring your teammates... who may return the favour. People play like they're terrified of everything, even in games with really low respawn times and infinite lives, so it's a surprise when anyone moves up. Nobody can shoot, so even if you are accompanied by that one precious guy who actually both sees and shoots at enemies he's not likely to save you. And of course there's the fact that he isn't worried about whether or not you are between him and the enemies. Then there are the other guys who jump in front of you, never fire a shot while you can see them (ever, not just while they're standing between you and the guy who's about to kill the lot of you), and will rage and teamkill you over and over until you or they quit if you even wound them.

Most of that rage is from BF3, I have to say. ME3 seemed to mostly just be packed with people who had no idea how to play. PS2 has its own brands of rage, induced by troll/griefer asshats and people who just fail to confine or manage their incompetence. We're all sick of being run over or crashed into by people who don't even try to pay attention to their surroundings (though first person view from a tank's driver position is absolutely horrendous as the field of view is only like 20°, and the aircraft have significant blind spots even when using free look (though most of the people who crash into me seem to not use that particular feature)). Four of five of us are sick of being the only ones to leave the teleporter rooms when assaulting bio labs and wondering why we have twenty or thirty allies sitting around in there after we clear the area. Something that apparently only irritates me would be the incompetent leadership. Whether I'm in a small squad or a packed platoon run by an outfit that's got two or three platoons running at a time, I'm getting orders from some random guy who's less aware than the random guys on the ground with me at the waypoint (if anyone else bothered to show up) and probably more cocky and self-important while still having little tactical or strategic sense. And of course half of these people don't speak clearly or have crap microphones. Those people who capped a base (or whatever you want to call them) and ran off? They were in a platoon or squad and their leader ordered them away before the cap was even done. Some of the orders I've been given literally caused me to just sit and stare at my screen, dumbfounded, for minutes just thinking "...What? Why the hell? That... what??!?" Oh, and no one uses or pays attention to text chat. If you're not in their voice channel (or, worse, on their TeamSpeak/Vent/Mumble/whatever server) then you'll likely never get a response at all if you have something to say. If you're lucky, everyone's just using the ingame voice comms.

I feel better already. Isn't ranting great?

 

[Avalanche91]

I had to take over mid during a game of Lol.....I was playing AD Sion.....Against Elise.....let the fun commence.

Other then that though, I seldom think people are irredeemably bad. Then again I tend to avoid most multiplayers.....

 

[Strazdas]

Whenever i play online shooters this is how i feel:

During one match of world of tanks i ended up riding ahead, shooting 5 enemy tanks, then while holding position saw the rest of the team die and had to win alone.
therei s also those times when my team left me alone in a flank and whole 14 of them decided to "rush" the other side. enemy hand 2 tanks there. all 14 of ours died. -.-

 

[MeChaNiZ3D]

Armored Core, virtually any of the games. There are three types of missions - missions you do alone, missions with supplied allies, and missions with optional allies. Supplied allies aren't that bad, but optional allies are always a poor choice because you have to pay for their reckless use of ammo and any damage they are sure to take because they're just not good players. In fact, picking an ally when you don't have to basically excludes you from getting a good ranking on the mission, which I find annoying.

 

[Tropicaz]

Everyone has to learn at some point, that might have been that group's first ever game of LoL, and tbh there's quite alot to get your head around if youve never played anything like it before.
I'm fine with playing with players that just arent good at the game, but as someone said before me, it's when i'm playing an FPS with an objective, and they just want to preserve a KD. For exmaple in CS:GO there was a guy who when he was the last one on our team just never tried to plant the bomb, cos he didnt want to leave his hiding spot.

 

[Trippy Turtle]

It happens all the time in Halo but in most games I actually enjoy it. I don't care about winning as long as I do good myself and it feels good to win a game 50-47 when you are on 39 of those kills or something. In Dota its not as fun because they can feed the enemy which makes it hard for me. And of course, Valve being Valve and needing to ruin their games with stupid features means I can't quit without using task manager and when I get shit for it. Who in their right mind would want to stick around in a game they have already lost without a doubt?

 

[Glademaster_v1legacy]

There are some terrible people that play LoL but by a long shot World of Tanks has much worse teams. Sometimes some of the things my team does makes my mind explode. Russians heavies who try to snipe(strength of Russian heavies are high damage low accuracy), TDs that lead a charge(they mostly have no side armour to speak of and most do not have a turret), Lights who suicide scout, people who think the high tier French lights are scouts, fast tanks that charge off on their own into kill zones and people who couldn't hit the side of a barn with the accurate guns.

I recently had a game in my BDR(tier 5 French heavy tank). I was one of the top tier tanks in this and my team managed to get completely wiped out by 7 minutes into the match and I do mean completely as I was last tank. Just before this I said fuck it and did a bit of suicide charge to enemy base. I killed 5 of their tanks and made it to the cap. I am still using the bad gun on the BDR.

 

[SomeLameStuff]

*snip*

You think THAT is bad? We manage to push back the enemy team and save our melee barrack by about 50 hp. Our Luna runs up and DENIES IT.

DENIES
OUR
MELEE
BARRACKS

Tell me how in ANY WAY POSSIBLE that is a good idea.

 

[Geo Da Sponge]

*snip*

You think THAT is bad? We manage to push back the enemy team and save our melee barrack by about 50 hp. Our Luna runs up and DENIES IT.

DENIES
OUR
MELEE
BARRACKS

Tell me how in ANY WAY POSSIBLE that is a good idea.

I know virtually nothing about DoTA 2, having only watched a couple of narrated gameplay videos, and even I can figure out how perfectly, brilliantly stupid that is.

 

[Legion]

Gears of War 3 - "Hey leader, we are playing Guardian, you need to stay alive so that we can still respawn. Okay why are you rushing the enemy? It's their job to kill you specifically, okay so you died, and now we have lost within 30 seconds..."

Left 4 Dead 1 and 2 - "Hey you there, stop running off without the rest of us. We are pretty far away from you now. What's that, you got pinned down by a Hunter? Well how is it our fault? We are the noobs? Oh, they quit."

Mass Effect 3 - "You have to sit inside the landing zone when the timer runs out in order to get maximum points and XP. It's not difficult, stop running off trying to get last minute kills when there are five seconds left to go."

Halo 4 - "Hey guys, you voted for capture the flag, how about capturing the flag? Hey guys, they have our flag, let's stop them. Guys... guys?"

Assassins Creed - "Hey guys we are on the attacking team, it's best to stay stealthy so that we get maximum points. Or just run around like you are playing a normal shooter..."

My general experience of multiplayer.

 

[DataSnake]

AI: Mikiko and Superfly from Daikatana
Human: This is why I tend to avoid random matchmaking.