Video Game Survival Guide: Vol I

[CheckD3]

333. Anytime you're in a conversation while able to look around during a transport ride, it will always end with your vehicle blowing up

 

[SoloStoffe]

1996. If you and your companions are lost and don't know where to go, the easiest way to find your goal is to walk in the direction the zombies are coming from.

762. Women may be bad drivers in cars, but they're you're best shot if you're in a space ship.

1242. Punching someone in the face with a frying pan is more effective than shooting them in the heart with a .50 CAL bullet.

1221. If there's zombies, be sure to grab guns, ammo, and pills.

 

[TimeLord]

333. Anytime you're in a conversation while able to look around during a transport ride, it will always end with your vehicle blowing up

333b: Unless you are playing Farcry 2, In which case you will contract the local disease and pass out

 

[RockyH]

671. If you're having money troubles, or any troubles at all, just use the magical cheat code box. IT WILL ALWAYS WORK.

 

[Tharwen]

3.14159265358979323846264338327950288:

You are fully trained with firearms and swords, unless the sword is made of a slightly different metal to the previous one.

9001: Found a door? How are your vent-crawling skills?

 

[Parallel Streaks]

564 - Any and all food, liquids or medicine you find will never have detrimental effects to your health, in fact, game foods seem to contain stemcells which can HEAL broken flesh and bone!
564b - Feel free to consume ridiculous amounts of medicine, either of same, similar or completely different varieties, there's no such thing as overdosing!

Thought I'd contribute with the two rules which I find the most ridiculous.

 

[radio1314]

1314- If you start a game and dont have a gun/sword, you will get one soon. Along with a mission or a destiny.

682- If you are in a halway full of dead bodies and it isn't a horror game. Something bad is comming up.

 

[tehbeard]

568. The power of weaponry found lying around is inversely proportional to distance/time from the final boss.

 

[Typhusoid]

9423 (Why not). Don't worry if an arm or leg gets shot/bitten/magicked off, a short lie down will prove sufficient to heal any injury.

 

[Audio]

903: Touching your flag, if found out of place, will teleport it home.
904: Touching a different colour flag to your own will attach itself to you. It is suggested you run.

 

[ironmace2.0]

79860018.If you get shot or loose a limb hide and wait for it to heal!

 

[mew4ever23]

682- If you are in a hallway full of dead bodies and it isn't a horror game. Something bad is comming up.

682b- If anyone at any time suggests that you are safe, re-load all your guns. Something bad is around the next corner.

In Half Life 2 episode 2:
Hang onto any combine balls (Ar2 altfire) you find. They kill hunters.

If it's a (Traditional) Zelda Game:
Any equipment found in a dungeon will be the one thing that defeats the boss.

 

[SoloStoffe]

658. Don't cross the beams.

 

[sneeky033]

645. STOP POKING THE SLEEPING BEAR!



646. Your shotgun/flamethrower has a maximum range of approximately six inches.



647. Stepping on boxes of random medical equipment will fix any cuts, bruises, broken bones, or brain hemorrhages you happen to be suffering from; not that they were slowing you down before you found it.

 

[MiracleOfSound]

101: Pick small guns.

 

[xbeaker]

Traffic laws are arbitrary. Police will either:

enter into unrelenting pursuit of you on sight regardless of what speed you are going, or if you were commiting any violations at all.

Driver reference?.

and pretty much every racing game ever made involving police.

 

[xbeaker]

You don't need a doctor! you just need to learn enough to level up. All wounds will be healed, even if you are actively being attacked.

 

[SoloStoffe]

333. Anytime you're in a conversation while able to look around during a transport ride, it will always end with your vehicle blowing up

333b: Unless you are playing Farcry 2, In which case you will contract the local disease and pass out

333c: Or if you're master Chief, in wich case you will be just fine and you can continue your mission normaly.