Videogame plots as newspaper headlines
- Thread starter rosac
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Unsafe upper stratosphere amusement park built by former criminal mastermind collapses, killing hundreds. Building inspectors are at a loss to explain why the place wasn't shut down prior to the incident. ~ sonic Colors
Undead legions terrorize nearby towns. Knights set out to challenge them to bejewled ~ Puzzle quest
Alien menace attacks Colony power cores. Military refuses to increase nonexistant military budget, and dispatches lone soldier to deal with threat ~Sanctum
Followup: Alien invaders massacred by single soldier. Mental stability of heroine is currently in question by top government officials ~Sanctum
New homeworld for humanity FINALLY found before sun explodes! Human leaders prefer that everyone just die instead. ~ SOL: Exodus
Locals report belongings are being stolen en masse. In other news, Dragonborn recently purchases castle ~ Skyrim
Famous webcomic hero Tycho found in a dumpster, next to short guy wearing luchador mask ~ Poker night at the inventory
Dozens found dead at foreign Biotech corporation. Cause of death seems to be mass epidemic of vending machine related accidents ~ Deus Ex: Human revolution
XD This is fun.
Captcha: Heavy metal....Yeah, I think the captha is talking about that last headline...XD
Undead legions terrorize nearby towns. Knights set out to challenge them to bejewled ~ Puzzle quest
Alien menace attacks Colony power cores. Military refuses to increase nonexistant military budget, and dispatches lone soldier to deal with threat ~Sanctum
Followup: Alien invaders massacred by single soldier. Mental stability of heroine is currently in question by top government officials ~Sanctum
New homeworld for humanity FINALLY found before sun explodes! Human leaders prefer that everyone just die instead. ~ SOL: Exodus
Locals report belongings are being stolen en masse. In other news, Dragonborn recently purchases castle ~ Skyrim
Famous webcomic hero Tycho found in a dumpster, next to short guy wearing luchador mask ~ Poker night at the inventory
Dozens found dead at foreign Biotech corporation. Cause of death seems to be mass epidemic of vending machine related accidents ~ Deus Ex: Human revolution
XD This is fun.
Captcha: Heavy metal....Yeah, I think the captha is talking about that last headline...XD
Age of fire brought to an abrupt halt by lone zombie- Dark Souls
Disturbing news from Aperture- was the cake ever there to begin with?- Portal(1 or 2)
Princess reported to be in another castle- is Peach sleeping around?- Super Mario
The last one may be best suited to a tabloid.
Disturbing news from Aperture- was the cake ever there to begin with?- Portal(1 or 2)
Princess reported to be in another castle- is Peach sleeping around?- Super Mario
The last one may be best suited to a tabloid.
Three ways you can stop a Reaper invasion, tonight at 11.
Reports of Dragonborn surfacing in Skyrim. Noise complaints reach an all time high in Whiterun.
Local man Niko Bellic kills 67 in hospital standout. Released 45 minutes after arrest on bail.
Thinking about going under the knife? Join us tonight for the 'Adam Jensen' story. Never lose your sunglasses again!
Reports of Dragonborn surfacing in Skyrim. Noise complaints reach an all time high in Whiterun.
Local man Niko Bellic kills 67 in hospital standout. Released 45 minutes after arrest on bail.
Thinking about going under the knife? Join us tonight for the 'Adam Jensen' story. Never lose your sunglasses again!
"Renowned demolition company attempts to resolve dispute with builders league blue, ends in bloodshed"
"Renowned demolition company attempts to resolve dispute with builders league "blu", ends in bloodshed"
You, sir/miss, have excellent taste in PC games.thaluikhain said:
EDIT: Also, "Corpse of giant wolfman found outside Tower of London. Witnesses claim sword-wielding trio responsible."
"Local superhero, "The Dragonborn" defeats the god of destruction, doesn't get praised what so ever"
"Australian claims to be American, also strangles a man for being too Russian"
"The New Vegas Strip, the New California Republic and Caesar's Legion defeated by a single courier"
"Child dies in the streets of London, all hell breaks loose"
"This issue comes free with 'Shepard and Co.' trading cards"
"Man bunkers down, prepares for the inevitable shit-storm of Mass Effect 3: Extended Cut"
"Man shits, decides to use toilet in the future"
"Australian claims to be American, also strangles a man for being too Russian"
"The New Vegas Strip, the New California Republic and Caesar's Legion defeated by a single courier"
"Child dies in the streets of London, all hell breaks loose"
"This issue comes free with 'Shepard and Co.' trading cards"
"Man bunkers down, prepares for the inevitable shit-storm of Mass Effect 3: Extended Cut"
"Man shits, decides to use toilet in the future"
"Aliens crushed! Giant ring things now open for real estate companies!!"
"Strange sickness sweeping New York. Authorities warn people not to, 'Hug the people bleeding from the nose and mouth.'"
"Massive construction accident deletes four levels of progress!"
"Tainted Coil war over! Sales of BDSM fetish wear at record low prices!"
"Zombies! Shoot them dead."
"The break up between Soul Calibur and Soul Edge! You won't believe what that eye has seen."
"'I have an eating addiction!' The confessions of one yellow sphere."
"'Pink slime is in all our food!' The words that brought down a diner."
"Magical gemstone stolen! Four magical midgets sent after midget wizard. Hilarity sure to ensue."
"New troop deployment of thirteen trillion to fight Orks defended by the logic of, 'We'd be bored otherwise.'"
"One soldier claims to be the only man ever to survive being stabbed with a knife. Exclusive interview with the Ex-SAS agent on page three."
"The weakness of the castle: An examination of the security of our beloved princess and why it's just not working."
"Seven thousandth pokemon master crowned! Acting champion says his hand's getting tired of writing down all the names."
"Roman cosplay goes horrible wrong. Three thousand dead."
"Marine drop goes horrible wrong. 'It was supposed to be a bug hunt man!' was what one survivor said."
"Recent wave of overloaded septic systems can be linked to one man in a castle in the middle of nowhere. Man responsible claims that it was completely necessary, quote: 'The things with the limp lips were after me, and I was out of diapers.'"
"Rapture under siege! Communist terrorist foreigner listed as culrpit"
"Day of reckoning arrives, and War comes without his back up!"
"Evil wizard Mondain slain! Hero says he plans to start building space condos soon."
"World War two won. Again."
"Gorden Freeman caught throwing bottles in people's eyes. Anonymous Resistance source says, 'This man is our savior. We're screwed.'"
"'The cake was almost ready, but she attacked me!' Claims super computer."
"'Time was never in peril!' Says experts. Two cops responsible for causing fear of a Time Crisis issue apology."
"'You can trust the people who worship god, or people called assassins.' Words from the leader of the Templars."
"Giant death factory at the center of the galaxy discovered; nearby planet now number one tourist attraction."
"'The staircase was creepy, and yelled at me.' The words of a prisoner put through inhumane experiments."
"Strange sickness sweeping New York. Authorities warn people not to, 'Hug the people bleeding from the nose and mouth.'"
"Massive construction accident deletes four levels of progress!"
"Tainted Coil war over! Sales of BDSM fetish wear at record low prices!"
"Zombies! Shoot them dead."
"The break up between Soul Calibur and Soul Edge! You won't believe what that eye has seen."
"'I have an eating addiction!' The confessions of one yellow sphere."
"'Pink slime is in all our food!' The words that brought down a diner."
"Magical gemstone stolen! Four magical midgets sent after midget wizard. Hilarity sure to ensue."
"New troop deployment of thirteen trillion to fight Orks defended by the logic of, 'We'd be bored otherwise.'"
"One soldier claims to be the only man ever to survive being stabbed with a knife. Exclusive interview with the Ex-SAS agent on page three."
"The weakness of the castle: An examination of the security of our beloved princess and why it's just not working."
"Seven thousandth pokemon master crowned! Acting champion says his hand's getting tired of writing down all the names."
"Roman cosplay goes horrible wrong. Three thousand dead."
"Marine drop goes horrible wrong. 'It was supposed to be a bug hunt man!' was what one survivor said."
"Recent wave of overloaded septic systems can be linked to one man in a castle in the middle of nowhere. Man responsible claims that it was completely necessary, quote: 'The things with the limp lips were after me, and I was out of diapers.'"
"Rapture under siege! Communist terrorist foreigner listed as culrpit"
"Day of reckoning arrives, and War comes without his back up!"
"Evil wizard Mondain slain! Hero says he plans to start building space condos soon."
"World War two won. Again."
"Gorden Freeman caught throwing bottles in people's eyes. Anonymous Resistance source says, 'This man is our savior. We're screwed.'"
"'The cake was almost ready, but she attacked me!' Claims super computer."
"'Time was never in peril!' Says experts. Two cops responsible for causing fear of a Time Crisis issue apology."
"'You can trust the people who worship god, or people called assassins.' Words from the leader of the Templars."
"Giant death factory at the center of the galaxy discovered; nearby planet now number one tourist attraction."
"'The staircase was creepy, and yelled at me.' The words of a prisoner put through inhumane experiments."
Princess Kidnapped Again!
Mushroom Kingdom Police under investigation once more for lapse in security.
Toad calls foul!
It could only have been an inside job, says Luigi (although he would)
Mushroom Kingdom Police under investigation once more for lapse in security.
Toad calls foul!
It could only have been an inside job, says Luigi (although he would)
Two Universes Collide Again - No Sign of the 'Blue Bomber'
Little Cactus Becomes Viral Blogger Celeb!
Little Cactus Becomes Viral Blogger Celeb!
