Well that date was weird...

[Mr Fixit]

So, I work in retail, and thus I receive many customers who converse with me. I also am a young female who primarily either works with males, or older women, so when I have young customers I get a fair amount of attention (this has nothing to do with my physical appearance, merely the fact that I'm like 30 years younger then everyone I work with.) So a nice young man comes over to me and asks me out. I'm single, so I figured a nice evening would be lovely, and I agree.

I was well aware he and I had little to nothing in common. I'm a female gamer, watch animation, have a comic series, am only like 5" tall and although thin, I do not exercise. This man was easily a foot taller then me, built like a brick house, and although a smart gentleman, his interests were in cars and body building. But hey, he was sweet, and anything can happen.

He picks me up and says he needs to do some shopping. I agree to go along, and on the way he only speaks about his tons of money that he has and the expensive items he spends it on. I'm a college student living in a box-like apartment eating raman and at times rats when they venture in, money is a rather rare thing for me. As we get to the store, and about ten minutes in he states "Oh man, we need to get matching bathrobes! For, like, when you sleep over at my place!"

Err... I begged against, but he insisted and purchased one. He also stated I needed more jewelry and wanted me to replace a precious gem of mine, of which I refused. Belly rings as well, because apparently mind was old fashioned and he wanted to satisfaction of "playing with a dangling one". He also wanted to buy me new shoes, due to the current ones I own being my work shoes, and my only real pair. Something about Uggs... No idea what kind of shoe those are but they sound unpleasant.

twenty minutes into dinner he exclaims he wants to "get serious, no lies up in here bro". first date mind you. I attempted to make small talk while trying to get a hold of friends, and he insisted on bringing me to his house.

Beautiful home, but his only furniture was a couch, tv, beer pong table, and a work out bench. So as I uncomfortably watched "Office Space" on his lonely couch in the dark unfurnished room, he proceeded to place his body on my lap while his friends worked out and did manly 'dude" things, whatever that may be. (Insert manly grunting noises while doing push ups. Whatever you desire). Pretty sure one was making peach cobbler as well. Maybe with his muscles, but it was happening. Damn he was enthusiastic about stirring.

Needless to say I have been avoiding the countless texts he has sent me about dating. Although I have informed him I was not interested for various reasons he still has not gotten the hint. I suppose I deserve this for going out with a random dude.

Topic: So Escapists, make me feel better. Tell me about an interesting, awkward, entertaining date you've experienced. :3

Sounds like you got a stalker, I'd be careful with that one. Oh & I don't mean to sound weird or anything, which saying that probably makes me sound like a freak, but anyway you sound like the perfect woman too me.

OT: Not too many odd dates for me, other than going with a girl when she was trying on bridesmaids dresses & everyone thinking I was the groom. Yeah boring dates for me.

 

[disgruntledgamer]

I agree to go along, and on the way he only speaks about his tons of money that he has and the expensive items he spends it on.

First sign on the Douchebag meter

"Oh man, we need to get matching bathrobes! For, like, when you sleep over at my place!" Err... I begged against, but he insisted and purchased one.

First sign on the creep meter

He also stated I needed more jewelry and wanted me to replace a precious gem of mine, of which I refused. Belly rings as well, because apparently mind was old fashioned and he wanted to satisfaction of "playing with a dangling one".

Second sign on the creep meter

He also wanted to buy me new shoes, due to the current ones I own being my work shoes, and my only real pair. Something about Uggs... No idea what kind of shoe those are but they sound unpleasant.

First sign on the Pimp O-meter

twenty minutes into dinner he exclaims he wants to "get serious, no lies up in here bro". first date mind you. I attempted to make small talk while trying to get a hold of friends, and he insisted on bringing me to his house.

Third sign on the creep meter

Beautiful home, but his only furniture was a couch, tv, beer pong table, and a work out bench.

First sign on the Serial Killer meter

He proceeded to place his body on my lap while his friends worked out

Forth sign on the creep Meter

Needless to say I have been avoiding the countless texts he has sent me about dating. Although I have informed him I was not interested for various reasons he still has not gotten the hint.

Creep meter Maxed officially a Creepy stalker

I suppose I deserve this for going out with a random dude.

No no you don't deserve it, but you really need to take hints better. This guy sounds like he keeps kittens in his freezer and I'm amazed you got out of his apartment alive. You should seriously consider getting a restraining order.

 

[Jenvas1306]

I kinda gave up dating after that, which wasnt long before I met my BF, with whom im very happy now.

Isn't that always the case? I meet my long term partner after deciding to buckle down and focus on my career.

weird as it is, that phenomenon seems like a cosmic joke.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

I'm a little surprised though that you went along with it for that long. I'd have been out of there when he started talking about the piercings. I wonder how many female skeletons he has buried in his yard.

Only an amateur buries bodies in their own backyard.

Bury them in the neighbour's backyard instead to throw suspicion off.

...

Stop looking at me like that, it's not like backpackers are real people.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

"Oh man, we need to get matching bathrobes! For, like, when you sleep over at my place!"

Err... I begged against, but he insisted and purchased one. He also stated I needed more jewelry and wanted me to replace a precious gem of mine, of which I refused. Belly rings as well, because apparently mind was old fashioned and he wanted to satisfaction of "playing with a dangling one".

Wat?

That's just... not right. Egads.

he insisted on bringing me to his house.

Beautiful home, but his only furniture was a couch, tv, beer pong table, and a work out bench. So as I uncomfortably watched "Office Space" on his lonely couch in the dark unfurnished room, he proceeded to place his body on my lap while his friends worked out and did manly 'dude" things, whatever that may be. (Insert manly grunting noises while doing push ups. Whatever you desire). Pretty sure one was making peach cobbler as well. Maybe with his muscles, but it was happening. Damn he was enthusiastic about stirring.

**cringes**

Seriously, I was waiting for him to turn out to be a serial killer. The friends with muscles thing is somehow weirder and more frightening.

Needless to say I have been avoiding the countless texts he has sent me about dating. Although I have informed him I was not interested for various reasons he still has not gotten the hint. I suppose I deserve this for going out with a random dude.

Wow. That was impressively bad. You may need to enter Witness Protection.

Topic: So Escapists, make me feel better. Tell me about an interesting, awkward, entertaining date you've experienced. :3

....

Yeah, no, sorry; I've got nothing that can match that. My bad dates have mostly just been dull, not anything so bizarre as you experienced. The weird ones were generally good dates, even if things weren't so good later.

I think the most awkward one I have is this:

Way back in highschool, I came out as bisexual by dating this girl from another school who I met at a football game (I was in the Band). She had a car which is where most of our early dates took place.

And then she took me home to meet her parents and I discovered something - her sexy accent wasn't just charming affect, she and her family were from Georgia. They were southern conservative republicans who owned guns. Lots of guns.

She introduced me to her mother, father, and grandmother as a friend. Then she took me to her bedroom to "watch Grease" - and yes, she actually put the movie on, it was one of her favorites for some reason - and tried to have sex with me.

Lesbian sex. With me. While her conservative, gun-owning parents were one thin wall away.

I told her I really wanted to watch Grease (which is not a movie I particularly like). So we sat there, holding hands, her singing along.

Then afterwards she asked me what I wanted to do then, a sultry look in her eyes. But I couldn't stop imaging my brutal murder.

So we watched Grease 2.

The horror. The horror.

 

[SaetonChapelle]

I was well aware he and I had little to nothing in common. I'm a female gamer, watch animation, have a comic series, am only like 5" tall and although thin, I do not exercise. This man was easily a foot taller then me, built like a brick house, and although a smart gentleman, his interests were in cars and body building.

He picks me up and says he needs to do some shopping. I agree to go along, and on the way he only speaks about his tons of money that he has and the expensive items he spends it on.

As we get to the store, and about ten minutes in he states "Oh man, we need to get matching bathrobes! For, like, when you sleep over at my place!"

twenty minutes into dinner he exclaims he wants to "get serious, no lies up in here bro".

Pretty sure one was making peach cobbler as well. Maybe with his muscles, but it was happening. Damn he was enthusiastic about stirring.

1) Where are you from because short gamer girls are my kryptonite. Sorry if that's weird.
2) Anything CAN happen but without common ground you're usually doomed.
3) He was trying to impress you. Or he's just full of himself. Or both.
4) The bath robes are a scarily obvious sex incentive
5) "bro"? He called you "bro"? Really? *sigh*
6) Probably a protein shake. With peaches. And muscles.

OT: I've never been on a serious "date" like that, so sorry. I just wanted to be relevant...

xD You're always relevant my friend. Never think you're not. And sadly upstate new york, where there's more cows and car dealerships then real people.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

I dunno which was the weirdest... the bird who had a screaming fit when she saw 2 blokes kissing in the cinema lobby or the bird who wanted to trade sexual favours in exchange for me beating the living crap out of her brother.

 

[D Moness]

So we watched Grease 2.

The horror. The horror.

O.O That is one massively terrible movie(massive understatement).
I love a lot of musicals but watching grease 2 would be close to hell.

As on the Uggs topic. They are rather popular where i am from and i think they look terrible. Always wondered why they became so popular in the first place.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Geeze, I wish some of the attractive women that come through the store I work at would show interest in me. Not that creepy an interest mind, just some interest would be nice.
Sorry I don't have any stories to share as I've barely been on any dates. ...which is really kind of pathetic since I am nearly 31.

 

[ToxicOranges]

Haha, I've actually never been on a proper date! Ever!

Wait. Oh dear.

I can contribute with a story of a friend where he visited her [My friend] and offered to take her out to the city, daytime, for shopping. She accepted, but brought along me and a few others as well. He was angry about that from the start, and then was overly touchy, angry, and generally a complete pr*ck to the rest of us, me especially.

Then, after she refused the 2nd date, he threatened to kill her. She doesn't talk to him any more.

 

[Twyce]

I posted these before in another thread, but Ill post them again, as I think they are very fitting. Also, Ill add in an extra story!

In my early twenties (/shakescane), I did a ton of online dating. Match.com, Eharmony, even Craigslist (UGH). I met some really, er... Interesting gentlemen during that time!

Anyway...

First one (surprisingly not an online date).

Spoiler

My friend set me up with a guy who was a bit older than me... I was in my early twenties, he in his thirties. We went on our first date, and had a nice time, so we make plans for a second.
We met up at a local park and proceeded to talk. During the conversation it came up that I never met my father (no biggie, whatevs). The guy gets a strange look on his face and goes, "Oh well that explains why you like me." Um...No.

I decided to let it slide and moved on. We started to walk around, and we come across a tree house or something. I remarked how fun it would be to have one of those, and he replied. "Well you didn't have a dad, of course you would." Strike two!

Strike three came at the end of the evening, we were talking over dinner, and he says, completely serious, "So, how do you feel about kids? I don't want to be an older father at those teeball games."

I paid my half of the check and left.

Next

Spoiler

I met a guy on match.com (I have so many good match stories, but this is a quick one). He seemed nice, so I agreed to meet him at a nearby bar for a drink. I arrive and he is already there with some friends, sitting in a booth. He greets me and I join them, and everyone is super nice, if not a little drunk, including my date. But hey, it's Friday, we are at a bar, what do I care?

Something came up, I forget what, where my date began to tease me about it. IIRC, it was about getting up to go to the bathroom. He didn't want me to go, and I was joking with him. Fun stuff. That is until he, decided to put me in a headlock.

I don't mind physical contact, and I know he was only kidding, but due to his intoxication level, he misjudged his strength and direction, and promptly hit me in the mouth, splitting open my lip. At first he didn't realize it, and continued to play wrestle with me (I was laughing nervously, trying to pull away), until one of his friends say, "Uh dude, she's bleeding all over your arm."

He let go and immediately went to get me a napkin and some ice. I actually felt really bad for him, I know he was super embarrassed. I wasn't upset, but at that point I figured it was time to go. I tried to contact him after, just to let him know it was cool, but he never responded.

New Addition, although it is short!

Spoiler

Craigslist guy (only met one, never again). We make plans to meet at a restaurant. I show up and the place is packed. I can't find him, so I text him asking where he is. His response, "Come find me. I can see you." I politely tell him I'd rather not play that game (as I wasn't even sure how accurate his photo was), but he continued to text me with messages like "You're cute when you're flustered." "I'm still watching you."

By this point, I'm pissed and tell him that if he doesn't let me know where is he, I'm leaving. This gets his attention, and I finally spot a guy waving to me from the back of the place. I sit down at the table and notice there is a drink waiting for me (a cosmo if I recall). I take one look at it and say, "I appreciate the thought, but I'm going to order something different." He gets a really hurt/angry look on his face and says "But I ordered it for you! Why not?!?" As if I really need to explain? I just continued to shake my head and apologize. He gets really sulky then and replies, "Fine. I'll get you something else." Instead of waiting for the waiter he heads to the bar.

As soon as he disappeared from sight I collected my stuff and left. He texted me a few times, but I ignored it. Bitchy or not, I definitely got a bad vibe from that date.

 

[The Funslinger]

Well, here's where it gets odd.

While I've had sex with three people, I've only ever been on one actual date. And that was with a girlfriend I only got to second base with 'fore shit hit the fan.

The date itself was alright. A movie. Not much was said during, but obviously that's movie protocol. Before and after, jokes were made, and she gave me a drawing of a wolf she'd spent ages on because she knew I love wolves.

So, that was a sweet and pleasant day. I should actually date more.

 

[Kyr Knightbane]

I have had a few.

The most notable one would have to be this girl i was dating in high school. We were pretty serious and it was getting toward the end of my senior year and she was going schizo about Prom. I asked her and she said yes. So being a working guy (Having a job at 17 working 12 hour shifts graves) I paid for everything because i had a bit of disposable income.

She shows up and asks if she and her 'friend' (a gentleman i haven't met before and knew nothing about) could use my bathroom to get ready.

Of course i say "you can, he cannot, as i don't know him"

She responds with random anger and storms into the bathroom, after trying to stealthily grope him, not realizing from that angle i missed... NOTHING. He sits on my couch and glares at me for the entire time, whipping a butterfly knife in and out, trying to intimidate while i sat in my chair, doing nothing really. (Besides texting my best friend, and requesting him to get over to my house)

She returns, 'ready' for prom. Picture this if you will:

I spent probably 200 bucks on her dress and shoes and accessories. It was a rental but i paid for the insurance and whatnot. She picked out the dress and everything and i merely paid for it.

Instead of using the hair straightener on her hair, she decided to burn holes in said dress. She had shredded the wonderfully crafted lower part til it looked like a cyberpunk fairy from a 90's cartoon show would wear.

She then rips the dress off, tells me i'm a selfish asshole, gives the random guy the sloppiest, most oddly sexual kiss right on my couch and they laugh and leave.

(I was able to return the dress and after apologizing profusely and telling the guy i'd pay full damages, he didn't charge me full price {400 extra dollars}. I managed to only have to pay an extra 100)

So yeah, my net profit for that 'date' was a ripped up dress, a trashed bathroom and a rather psychotic ex girlfriend, who i STILL, don't have any idea how i managed that one.

My buddy showed up, and we went bowling instead. He was such an awesome bro, he had a tux left over from a wedding and since i was mostly gussied up, we went bowling in tux's and ties. Probably the most fun I've had bowling ever.

A chick wilfully accepted money from you. A vast amount (for your age), and she goes berserk?
How unexpected. Bro, you were asking for it.

I think the unexpected part of this came from how even tempered she was while we had been dating. It wasn't a short relationship and although things never got 'physical' so to speak, she had never acted like that before. It was a bit odd, but perhaps i did ask for it.

 

[Flamezdudes]

I've never had a particularly weird date myself since I haven't really dated at all and have only ever had one girlfriend and that started very strangely.

I have had a very awkward date with someone though who I met on the internet when I was 13/14. This girl was a mutual friend of one of my friends from school and we had spoken for a while and she seemed nice looking so we went to the movies.

Now, this makes me sound like an arsehole but it turned out that she was completely unattractive (at least in my opinion) and it turned out to be incredibly awkward in the end, since we hardly spoke at all to each other.

After that date I spoke to her about once or twice and then stopped talking all together I think, I can't particularly remember.

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

Lol the OP's story is so freaking wierd....

I think the weirdest thing that has ever happened to me as a guy chatting me up for ages and then suddenly acting like nothing had ever happened.

I liked him so I was pretty hurt. I would have just put it down to me being 'not good enough' or whatever but he was the one coming on strong. Then one day he just acted like we had always been just friends and denied he had ever said anything romantic to me. It was like I was talking to a completely different person.


It was really confusing especially since I had only just gotten out of an abusive relationship. We are good friends now and I try not to hold it against him but I still feel rather bitter about it.

 

[Oly J]

Or the one who preferred communication via text... even in person.

0_o You met a real life Moeka?!?! REALLY?!

(She's a character from Steins;Gate [A time travel anime]. She is so shy that she will literally text people right next to her rather than say the words)

I know a few people like that, I wish I had a story of my own but unfortunately I don't

 

[Setrus]

o_o Leaving that date early might have been a good idea OP...

As to any stories...well this one time wasn't so much a "date".
I was in my room in a student-corridor (now got my own place, thank god) and I get an email from a strange adress I only vaguely recognise. Turns out it's one of the new girls from China that has moved in further down the corridor (there were 12 appartments in all) that I had exchanged maybe two sentences with until now and only seen once.
The conversation went something like this;
Her: Hey, you home?
Me: Yep, what's up? You need help? (I was kind of the handy-man there)
Her: Could I come over?
Me: Huh? Sure, is it something serious?
Her: I'm horny.
Me: ...oh? And you want me to...? (I MAY have entered a wink at this point...shut up, don't judge me. ;-) )
Her: Have sex.

After that it was a pretty short conversation before she arrived, bossed me aside, took over my computer so she could get it to play some odd music too low to hear, then jumped me...and proceeded to go limp as a ragdoll while I went at it.

...I didn't know losing your virginity could go from exciting and intense to outright dull so quickly.

Another one was a more "proper" date set up by my little sister with a girl who I had "so much in common with".
She spent the entire time talking about football (that's soccer for you yanks)which I had zero interest in, some comedian I've never heard of and whose jokes can't really be transmitted well by her, no matter how much she tried. I tried finding some common ground, but there were none that I could find before she returned to her topics.
Later, after dinner, she was going to take a buss, so I offer to escort her there...midway there she makes company with two random guys for a conversation half the way before graciously allowing me to take her the last bit in silence.
There was no second date...neither of us was pleased with my sister.

 

[DigitalAtlas]

My one odd date? I generally don't go out on dates per say. I lived on campus, so it was more meet girl, hang out with girl, girl spends night, pretend to be in love, break up with girl, meet next girl, repeat tragic process. Ah, that was the life.

But I do have an odd one!

I met a girl at a HORRIBLE Halloween party (the police busted it, and please note I'm 21 and did not know there were minors present), and we exchanged phone numbers. We started txting and one day she tells me to come over and hang out, so I did. We ended up having relations about, ohhhh, five minutes after I showed up? Then we went to Denny's, where we conversed and actually had a good time. We ate our food, she paid the bill when she said she was going to the restroom, left when Bieber started playing, and then it got weird again. She had asked me to... take her to Wal-Mart so she could stock up on items. Just felt weird. We're not married, why are we going shopping together? We even ran into a classmate of mine who asked me "Is this your girlfriend?" and she had to blurt out "YEP! "

Weird, just weird. Sweet girl though. Might see her again.