what are you doing with your life?

[Vault101]

somthing seriously weird happned last night

I was on facebook, which is great for spying on and judging people you used to know when I came across a pic of a girl I used to be freinds with in highschol. She apaeared to be pregnant and the photo was tagged "baby shower"

I stared at the screen dumbfounded mumbling "NO!..NOOOOOOOOOO...no no no nno noooo no NO!!??"

I mean she's like 20, younger than me, she's not a trashy person, she's kind of catholic and while she did say she wanted kids in school I'm thinking WHHHAAAAT!!?

I'm not judging her if she is pregant (small chance it could be a joke) its just it totally weirds me out that she's off going to have a baby, whereas I'm still collecting action figures

so my topic here is do oyu ever fidn yourself comparing yourself to others in terms of where you are in life?

 

[Mr Fixit]

I went to high school with a girl that was pregnant at 14, but she is the sweetest, nicest girl you'd ever meet. Yeah that baby is in high school now.

Anyway I haven't done shit with my life & it's really starting to bug me. I think I might have found someone to finally start a "real" life with, but we'll see how it goes. I should not be this bad of a procrastinator.

 

[soren7550]

so my topic here is do oyu ever fidn yourself comparing yourself to others in terms of where you are in life?

All the time. I'm going to be 21 in February, and I never had steady employment. I only had two paying jobs that have lasted less than a month. I was unable to go to college due to lack of money for it, lack of smarts for it, and due to the fact my mother kept being sent to the hospital for a number of health problems. My family isn't speaking to me, on account that they believe my mother's BS that I pulled a knife on her, which as a result landed me into an insanity ward for 2 1/2 weeks. My relationship with my boyfriend, which I had believed to be going great for the both of us, is on the rocks due to the before mentioned unemployment, and as a result, I face homelessness.

This has put me into a deep pit of depression.

My roomies however, don't have any real cares in the world. Their parents pay for everything, they have cushy jobs they got through their folks, they're going to college, they have a bunch of friends, they smoke weed all the time, and I hate them all so much for it.

How can I not help but feel like an utter failure when I have that all going on? They act like a bunch of jackasses with no regards to the law or anything, and they have everything, while I have through my whole life tried to do right by everyone, behave the best I could, do whatever I was told, kept to myself and quiet so as to not upset people, and I got just about nothing.

 

[Rawne1980]

Not really no.

i've got a pretty good life now. Amazing wife, great kids (when they are asleep) and a job I love. I'm incredibly happy.

I do wish certain things could change. My wife is a nurse and works incredibly long hours but she loves her job. I wish she was home a bit more but they are understaffed and it's something she's passionate about and took her a while to get back into after being home with the kids for the first couple of years.

But I can't complain. I have everything I need (apart from a proper parking space, I hate my neighbour).

 

[Vault101]

Sometimes.

I'm aware there are friends I had at school, who are younger than me, who are married with children by now.
Not where I want to be. Not at this stage of life anyway.

yeah no way do I want to be pregnant...

in fact I was just realised I may never have kids....I have about 6 years of optimial time...even taking out the variable of fidning a partner how much can I acheive in 6 years? at this rate? do I want to be trying in my 30's when my eggs are of less quality?

in the future mabye therre will be all kinds of fertility treatments (since I'm damn sure there will be a market for it) but still

 

[Ljs1121]

Not really.

I'm relatively young yet, so there's no real reason for me to be comparing my life to those of my peers. Sometimes I do wish that I was better at athletics or could play an instrument properly or had some kind of talent whatsoever, but as a whole I think I have it pretty good as of right now.

 

[Duck Sandwich]

Yes. While I still live with my parents at 22 years old, I try to rely on them as little as possible by paying my own groceries/gas/etc., and doing my own cooking/cleaning. One of my friends is in pretty much the same boat as me. We both finished post-secondary education with shit chances for jobs, and ended up working for relatives. I try to be responsible and save money where I can, but I'm always bound to get the "You live with your parents, you don't have to worry about money" talk. It always confuses me when I see people with nicely decorated houses and massive movie/music/game collections complain about being broke.

The only thing I look forward to nowadays is my main hobby - amateur kickboxing.

 

[SonicWaffle]

so my topic here is do oyu ever fidn yourself comparing yourself to others in terms of where you are in life?

My best friend is married. Most of my friends have degrees, some of them even masters or doctorates. Two of my other friends are training as nurses, another as a teacher, yet another is rising through the ranks of the Royal Navy and is soon to be in charge of actual, genuine warships.

I'm an unqualified alcoholic suffering from depression, whose job looks to be going the way of the dodo after Christmas, I'm single and lonely, I spend far too much tme on forums or reading comics or playing games rather than improving my life.

I've got friends who, in their mid-20's and not exactly financially stable, have kids or think they might be pregnant. Many of my friends have severe drug-and-alcohl problems, plenty of them are out of work, a lot of them have served time in prison and are frequently arrested.

So while my life sucks, especially when I compare it to many of my friends' lives, when I compare it to others it doesn't seem all that bad. I feel bad about where I am in my life, but there are people who remind me I could have it worse!

 

[SonicWaffle]

My roomies however, don't have any real cares in the world. Their parents pay for everything, they have cushy jobs they got through their folks, they're going to college, they have a bunch of friends, they smoke weed all the time, and I hate them all so much for it.

This is starting to sound like the backstory of a CSI killer...

How can I not help but feel like an utter failure when I have that all going on? They act like a bunch of jackasses with no regards to the law or anything, and they have everything, while I have through my whole life tried to do right by everyone, behave the best I could, do whatever I was told, kept to myself and quiet so as to not upset people, and I got just about nothing.

OK, yeah, if I read in the news about a bunch of pot-smoking kids brutally murdered by their frustrated housemate, I know who I'll blame

"I was nice! I was a good person all my life, and the world just shit all over me! Well, no more. Now it's time for me to teach them all a lesson! They want me to be a bastard? Oh, boy, be careful what you wish for!"

 

[Casual Shinji]

All the time! It's the reason why I get up in the morning... Well, maybe not that, but it's pretty much impossible for me not compare where I am now in my life as opposed to other people I know, because I'm not really anywhere.

I kinda float in the middle of nowhere, achieving nothing and meeting no one. And I've gone way past the point where I simply stopped caring if I ever do. Whether that's a good thing or a bad thing, I don't know.

[sub]Well, I probably do care somewhat, otherwise I wouldn't be comparing my life with anyone else's.[/sub]

 

[Terratina.]

Yeah, since I failed some exams and am now resitting them. Some of my smart friends are getting ready for uni now, while I'm stuck in a sixth-form college. Makes me jealous sometimes.

I'm basically trying to heave a great ton of work off my shoulders. Not pleasant though.

Other than that, watching other people's relationships crash and burn or the opposite and wishing that I had some free to practice some drawing more.

 

[Elementary - Dear Watson]

I was nearly married... I have a career, a place to live and all that jazz, and I had a girl I had been with for 4.5 years! I was choosing a ring one weekend, being particularly indecisive about which one was the perfect one, when I decided to put it off... that night after I picked her up from work she inexplicably dumped me... just like that... and I didn't hang around for an explanation (was far too upset!... )

So now I am a single guy living the RAF life properly... I am mid-20's and am free to do what ever crazy idea I want! I travelled europe on a train when I came back from the middle east... I travel the country seeing friends and attending meals and functions on my weekends, and I even have 3 holidays booked for next year! (All to see friends from other countries!) Hell... I even get to do things like Escapism UK, and want to go to some con's for the sirst time too...

There is one niggling feeling though... because I was so close to settling down it still confuses me that I am not... and I often feel like I should be trying to settle down... this conflict of interests makes me over critical of girls, which I use as a poor excuse to myself for not trying to meet someone... Not so much a problem at the moment, but I have been single for about 19 months now, which has been my choice, and part of me sees that as good, and the other sees it as very wrong! :S

So that is where my life stands at the moment! Crazy party style, with a hint of guilt...

EDIT: Just realised I missed the 'other people' part... that is what makes me feel kinda guilty... the people I trained with are starting to get hitched now, but they are a couple of years older than me on average anyway... That bit I struggle to see though! In the forces there aren't really age gaps, unless you are giving people banter for it! Everyone just hangs with everyone, so it is common for the younger lads like me to feel left behind the older guys!

 

[Insanity72]

Well I just finished high school. What I'd really like to do is take a gap year and just relax with a part time job, but thanks to Centerlink, I have to have either full time employment or be studying something by April....so at some point i'm going to have to find somewhere where I can do my Bachelor of Psychology and see where that goes.

 

[Ruairi iliffe]

Kinda had a similar moment few years back, but it was more a self reflective 'What the fuck AM I doing' moment.

Had no Job, no prospects, no Girl, no money and lived in a shit little shared flat living off the dole.

But then I Got lucky, met an awesome girl online, Told my country to go fuck itself and left. Less than a week later I got a Job in the industry I love, started to learn and exercise again And now I'm getting married next year. Not bad for a 23 year old, and hey I'm causing what you described to my old mates back home now

 

[DoomyMcDoom]

I look at all the people who are striving and achieving much, and look at myself, always walking a line between death(absolute failure), and just surviving.
I sorta gave up on any delusions of grandure, or ambitions for major success, if all my effort and all of the energy I expend, only seems to end up with me just barely making it, and life being as short as it is, I'm just trying to enjoy what I have as much as I can.

When it comes to death, well, I've stared it in the face on multiple occasions, and it's brought me a different perspective, even though I struggle with depression, even though it's seemingly impossible for me to really "get anywhere" in my life, life's too short to live for the future, because if I stress and strive, and tomorrow I'm killed, I'll have wasted what little time I have just worrying.

 

[GeneralFungi]

I'm still in high school so I'm not in a position where any of my peers are further down the road in life then I, but I am sort of jealous how some of my classmates simply seem better at schoolwork then I. I get through school with pretty good grades while studying for tests, but I have one friend with above 90 marks who only needs to study for the harshest of exams. Basically, they're set for whatever college they want to go to but I'm afraid that I will struggle to find a college that would accept me AND have the kind of courses I'm interested in taking.

I cannot help but be the slightest bit bitter about it, though I would never outwardly say it or let it affect my psyche too much. But it does nibble at the back of my mind sometimes.

Captcha; Scot free

..You are cruel captcha. You really are.

 

[Vhite]

I'm on the uni in my first semester trying to race the most elite of my peers into the next one. I've learned what it really means to learn (forcefully if necessary) and I'm getting baby's first depressions when there's just too much of it. I'm overall happy, I just have to finish uni or die trying because I'm not the person for honest hard work.

 

[Lionsfan]

I try not to, but yeah it's kind of hard not to. Especially when most of my friends are graduating college this year and are getting offers to work at companies, or going overseas, or something, and here I am with barely 2 years worth of schooling under my belt