What car have you always wanted?
- Thread starter Communist partisan
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As a self confessed petrolhead I feel I must reply to this thread although the list of cars on my "list" is longer than a football team managers list of excuses for their team being shit. I've also got a fair bit of experience because I used to drive a vast range of cars for a living (Pay was shit but it was a fucking good job!). Therefore I am going to do something guaranteed to annoy you all and comment on your choices.
Saab 900 - Why? Every Saab I have driven, of which there have been many, have all been the same. Bland, heavy, ugly, uninspired dross who's only saving grace was that they could headbutt a tank and not feel anything.
Ferrari - Pretty unoriginal but I can see why people want them. The only problem is the people who tend to buy them these days are over-indulged fuckwits with big wallets and no driving skills. If I see one more glorious supercar wrapped round a tree because the idiot who bought it thought it instantly made him a good driver I will set fire to his head. That said, if you are a handy wheelman who doesn't mind being spat on you could do a lot worse than a Ferarri!
1969 Roadrunner - Excellent choice. For all it's faults, the car was unashamedly blue-collar and proud. The "beep-beep" horn was a bit of fun but you can't ignore the fact that the RR was not pretentious. Big engine up front, rear wheel drive at the back and presence that even Ron Perlman would envy.
Aston Martin DB5 - An all time classic and I applaud geek2008 for his impeccable taste of both car and spy. Like the RoadRunner, it was fairly poor in the power and handling stakes but who gives a toss when it looks so good?
Knight Rider - Old Pontiac: Yes provided they lose those stupid, black wheeltrims. New one...where's my Bazooka?
Citroen DS - Hideously ugly, over-complicated peice of badly-made toss.
DeLorean DMC-12 - Thankfully Quaxar pulls a 180. OK so the engine was an underpowered lump of French / Swedish shit (PRV-6 = Puegeout, Renault, Volvo 6 cylinder) but you can't deny that the DMC-12 was a bold move and what would BTTF be without it?
Land Rover Defender - Yes.
Morris Traveller - No.
New Impreza WRX STi - No. Sorry but whoever decided to make a world-beating saloon into a fucking ugly-arsed hatchback needs impaling.
VW Campervan - Hippymobile and therefore requires burning.
Mazda RX-8 - Sad revival of a once brave and innovative car. Now just a gimmick - suicide doors and a wankel engine, famed for producing so much power from such a small capacity but also from being a fragile, unreliable, oil-burning bugger of an engine. I still say they should make the rotor-tips out of dried Wheetabix, the hardest substance known to man.
69 Camaro SS - Good choice! See my response to the RoadRunner for my reasons.
TVR Tuscan - Brave man! Good car but will bite you very hard in the arse if you annoy it. Just don't spill it's pint and you should be fine!
Volvo Amazon - Shit...a car I haven't heard of. I will reserve judgement although my Volvophile mate James will no-doubt say it's brilliant.
Audi R8 - No arguments here - I'd have one! Get the new V10 model.
1969 Corvette Stingray - Possibly the most agressive looking car of all time with an engine that could restart a dying star and that makes a noise that makes me have a crisis. Just don't go round any corners and you'll be fine!
BMW 507 Roadster - Kind of out of left field and I respect that. Besides I drive a Beemer so I can't do little else than give this one the thumbs up. Swap you for my 323i!
SmartCar - Dunno, too tall to fit in it. Have driven it's big brother, the smart FourTwo and it had the worst gearbox in the world. Coming from someone who loathes autoboxes in general, that's a fairly serious complaint.
PT Cruiser - If you mean the new one I suggest you have your eyes tested. If you mean the old one, good call!
Swiss Pinzgauer - Another one that's not in my lexicon. I must remedy this immediately!
1958 Plymouth Fury - Nice looking car and star of Stephen King's Christine. My GF loves the film and the car so I suppose I'd best give this choice the thumbs up if I ever want sex from her again!
Jaguar XJ220 - I want to fall to my knees and heap untold levels of worship on RanD00M for their incredible taste in cars. The best choice here so far by a long way!
Mazda RX-7 - Everything the RX-8 wanted to be but failed at.
Batmobile - I can see why. Chicks dig the car, after all.
VW Scirocco - A modern classic.
1967 Mustang GT500 fastback - "one of the most gorgeous pieces of machinery in existence" - No arguments from me on that score!
DB9/DBS - I'd go for the DBS. It's faster, more powerful, handles better and doesn't chew up it's tyres after ten minutes. Makes a noise that makes any real man ejaculate whenever he hears it.
Audi RS/6 - My Dad drives an Audi and he's one of the few people I'm scared of so this gets my props!
If I were to choose but ten cars (that no-one else has already picked here), here would be my picks...in no real order.
1) Bugatti Veyron - It can do over 250mph and yet has all the modern comforts. This is a marvel of 21st century engineering at it's finest!
2) General Lee - If it's not already apparent, I like muscle-cars!
3) 1969 Mustang GT390 Fastback - Has looks to die for and makes a noise that they can only dream of in the biggest bits of the Bible.
4) Mercedes McLaren SLR - Great looks, great comfort, blistering speed, great noise...shame it's only available in automatic-transmission though.
5) 1974 Dodge Monaco - The Bluesmobile!
6) Ford Escort RS Cosworth - An old favourite. The Focus RS wants to be this car but it could never be in a million years because it's got "Chav" written all over it and front-fucking-wheel-drive...which is for the feeble.
7) Vauxhall Monaro VXR - Mad arsed Ozzie musclecar with a British badge and a 6.0litre Yank V8. Made to powerslide and no bad thing!
8) E39 BMW M5 - Possibly the best looking saloon car in the world. Big V8 means it's no slouch either.
9) Dodge Viper - A great name for a car that is mad as arseholes. Was overtaken by one the other week on the M1 and I nearly skidded on my own dribble.
10) Caterham 7 - I used to never bother with Caterhams but last year I got the chance to rag one, and a number of hugely powerful cars, round a track but they mostly made it easy and, dare I say, boring with their big wings, fat tyres and so on. The Caterham was fizzy, tricky, noisy, shaky and required me to really pay attention. For that reason it was, by miles, the most FUN and most REWARDING car to rag round a track and powerslide halfway up the main straight. By the end of the session my arms were hanging off my shoulders - I was exhausted and at the same time the most satisfied and exhilirated I have ever been in my entire life!
Wardy
PS If anyone picks the Prius I know a good looney-bin...
Saab 900 - Why? Every Saab I have driven, of which there have been many, have all been the same. Bland, heavy, ugly, uninspired dross who's only saving grace was that they could headbutt a tank and not feel anything.
Ferrari - Pretty unoriginal but I can see why people want them. The only problem is the people who tend to buy them these days are over-indulged fuckwits with big wallets and no driving skills. If I see one more glorious supercar wrapped round a tree because the idiot who bought it thought it instantly made him a good driver I will set fire to his head. That said, if you are a handy wheelman who doesn't mind being spat on you could do a lot worse than a Ferarri!
1969 Roadrunner - Excellent choice. For all it's faults, the car was unashamedly blue-collar and proud. The "beep-beep" horn was a bit of fun but you can't ignore the fact that the RR was not pretentious. Big engine up front, rear wheel drive at the back and presence that even Ron Perlman would envy.
Aston Martin DB5 - An all time classic and I applaud geek2008 for his impeccable taste of both car and spy. Like the RoadRunner, it was fairly poor in the power and handling stakes but who gives a toss when it looks so good?
Knight Rider - Old Pontiac: Yes provided they lose those stupid, black wheeltrims. New one...where's my Bazooka?
Citroen DS - Hideously ugly, over-complicated peice of badly-made toss.
DeLorean DMC-12 - Thankfully Quaxar pulls a 180. OK so the engine was an underpowered lump of French / Swedish shit (PRV-6 = Puegeout, Renault, Volvo 6 cylinder) but you can't deny that the DMC-12 was a bold move and what would BTTF be without it?
Land Rover Defender - Yes.
Morris Traveller - No.
New Impreza WRX STi - No. Sorry but whoever decided to make a world-beating saloon into a fucking ugly-arsed hatchback needs impaling.
VW Campervan - Hippymobile and therefore requires burning.
Mazda RX-8 - Sad revival of a once brave and innovative car. Now just a gimmick - suicide doors and a wankel engine, famed for producing so much power from such a small capacity but also from being a fragile, unreliable, oil-burning bugger of an engine. I still say they should make the rotor-tips out of dried Wheetabix, the hardest substance known to man.
69 Camaro SS - Good choice! See my response to the RoadRunner for my reasons.
TVR Tuscan - Brave man! Good car but will bite you very hard in the arse if you annoy it. Just don't spill it's pint and you should be fine!
Volvo Amazon - Shit...a car I haven't heard of. I will reserve judgement although my Volvophile mate James will no-doubt say it's brilliant.
Audi R8 - No arguments here - I'd have one! Get the new V10 model.
1969 Corvette Stingray - Possibly the most agressive looking car of all time with an engine that could restart a dying star and that makes a noise that makes me have a crisis. Just don't go round any corners and you'll be fine!
BMW 507 Roadster - Kind of out of left field and I respect that. Besides I drive a Beemer so I can't do little else than give this one the thumbs up. Swap you for my 323i!
SmartCar - Dunno, too tall to fit in it. Have driven it's big brother, the smart FourTwo and it had the worst gearbox in the world. Coming from someone who loathes autoboxes in general, that's a fairly serious complaint.
PT Cruiser - If you mean the new one I suggest you have your eyes tested. If you mean the old one, good call!
Swiss Pinzgauer - Another one that's not in my lexicon. I must remedy this immediately!
1958 Plymouth Fury - Nice looking car and star of Stephen King's Christine. My GF loves the film and the car so I suppose I'd best give this choice the thumbs up if I ever want sex from her again!
Jaguar XJ220 - I want to fall to my knees and heap untold levels of worship on RanD00M for their incredible taste in cars. The best choice here so far by a long way!
Mazda RX-7 - Everything the RX-8 wanted to be but failed at.
Batmobile - I can see why. Chicks dig the car, after all.
VW Scirocco - A modern classic.
1967 Mustang GT500 fastback - "one of the most gorgeous pieces of machinery in existence" - No arguments from me on that score!
DB9/DBS - I'd go for the DBS. It's faster, more powerful, handles better and doesn't chew up it's tyres after ten minutes. Makes a noise that makes any real man ejaculate whenever he hears it.
Audi RS/6 - My Dad drives an Audi and he's one of the few people I'm scared of so this gets my props!
If I were to choose but ten cars (that no-one else has already picked here), here would be my picks...in no real order.
1) Bugatti Veyron - It can do over 250mph and yet has all the modern comforts. This is a marvel of 21st century engineering at it's finest!
2) General Lee - If it's not already apparent, I like muscle-cars!
3) 1969 Mustang GT390 Fastback - Has looks to die for and makes a noise that they can only dream of in the biggest bits of the Bible.
4) Mercedes McLaren SLR - Great looks, great comfort, blistering speed, great noise...shame it's only available in automatic-transmission though.
5) 1974 Dodge Monaco - The Bluesmobile!
6) Ford Escort RS Cosworth - An old favourite. The Focus RS wants to be this car but it could never be in a million years because it's got "Chav" written all over it and front-fucking-wheel-drive...which is for the feeble.
7) Vauxhall Monaro VXR - Mad arsed Ozzie musclecar with a British badge and a 6.0litre Yank V8. Made to powerslide and no bad thing!
8) E39 BMW M5 - Possibly the best looking saloon car in the world. Big V8 means it's no slouch either.
9) Dodge Viper - A great name for a car that is mad as arseholes. Was overtaken by one the other week on the M1 and I nearly skidded on my own dribble.
10) Caterham 7 - I used to never bother with Caterhams but last year I got the chance to rag one, and a number of hugely powerful cars, round a track but they mostly made it easy and, dare I say, boring with their big wings, fat tyres and so on. The Caterham was fizzy, tricky, noisy, shaky and required me to really pay attention. For that reason it was, by miles, the most FUN and most REWARDING car to rag round a track and powerslide halfway up the main straight. By the end of the session my arms were hanging off my shoulders - I was exhausted and at the same time the most satisfied and exhilirated I have ever been in my entire life!
Wardy
PS If anyone picks the Prius I know a good looney-bin...
Souped up, custom painted Volkswagen Beetle. I'm not really a real car guy, I think people who obsess over cars are annoying.
Ohhh fuck yes! Just a shame about the chromed alloys though. I've yet to find a car that looks good with chromed rims. Oh fuck it...I can ignore them this once - Excellent choice and not even an Italian supercar can pull off lime green and that Hemi-engine...excuse me...I need the lavatory!Nurb said:71 hemi cuda with a shaker hood
Wardy
I am no car nut, I know nearly nothing about cars, but there is one car I have always wanted, saw it when I was little at a fair in the summer, I wanted it at first sight
1. Audi R8 Spider, so sexy you will heavily consider fornicating with it.
2. Ariel Atom, scaffolding with wheels and a type R engine. Goes from 0 to 100 in just under the time it takes for you to crap yourself.
3. Audi RS6, a station wagon with about 500ish bhp
4. Holden HSV Senator (its Aussie so id suggest google)
2. Ariel Atom, scaffolding with wheels and a type R engine. Goes from 0 to 100 in just under the time it takes for you to crap yourself.
3. Audi RS6, a station wagon with about 500ish bhp
4. Holden HSV Senator (its Aussie so id suggest google)
