Resignation to failure on the ' nice guys' ' part, perhaps?dragoness said:
Having lived in a coed dorm and worked at a jail I can tell you this is very true and it can create some... lets call them 'apocolyptic' situations.Cpt_Oblivious said:
hmmm, let me think. maybe. smiling, checking them out in the halls. waving. giving them hugs. oh yea, there was that one guy, who actually was an a-hole, who decided that it would be hilarious to say to me "no one here likes you, why do you keep hanging out here?" after i'd hung out with him(giving him hugs, and offering to be a cuddle buddy)/his roomie/and like 3 other people for like a month. i packed up my comp and went somewhere else. needless to say, one of the 3 other people stopped to see why i was crying. i told him, and he gave me a hug saying "that guys a dick, don't listen to him." so it seems to me that for every jerk, they seem to draw the "nice guys" to them as friends.Jonatron said:
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disturbingly enough I have been thankful for being a guy for the same reason since I was a little kid,had no idea how it worked,just knew it hurt like 'ell.xmetatr0nx said:
to tell ya the truth, i'm sick of trying to hit on guys. the last time that happened, i dated a guy a month before he go so immersed in his ex again, that he ditched me. -sigh- i don't think i'm that bad looking. i dress a little conservatively, and i don't really use makeup. sure i could drop a couple pounds, but i mean, for a college student, who wouldn't? though, i guess maybe it's the minor bit's of acne that still manage to show up, even though i'm out of my "puberty" phase. -.- shoot, i know i have a sense of humor(albit dark and scary, and sometimes really inappropirate) and i'm easy to get along with (not THAT easy >.> i make people work for it). but mostly it's my unique personality that i'm proud of. but why don't other people see that?Catchphrase said:If you're not half-bad looking, I can't really give you an explanation, other than the guys being insecure and/or shy.dragoness said:why is that? or more, why will no guy hit on me? it's obvious i'm not doing anything. i sit in an open room all day at the student center @ college, and not one guy stops to say hi, or find out if i'm single. maybe if i wore a shirt saying "hit on me!" or "stop and talk, i'm free
But then again; Why don't you just hit on some guys? Why do you need them to come to you, and not the other way around?
Unfortunately, it's likely far too cryptic for a good, kind, nice guy (With possible bad Intellectual Whore issues and a lack of experience). It's very friendly, but, that's it. It's really friendly. Like a female friend, not a girl friend. How to change that? I have no clue... I do hope you find the solution. It's a right bugger of a situation to be found in.dragoness said:hmmm, let me think. maybe. smiling , checking them out in the halls. waving. giving them hugs . oh yea, there was that one guy, who actually was an a-hole, who decided that it would be hilarious to say to me "no one here likes you, why do you keep hanging out here?" after i'd hung out with him(giving him hugs, and offering to be a cuddle buddy)/his roomie/and like 3 other people for like a month. i packed up my comp and went somewhere else. needless to say, one of the 3 other people stopped to see why i was crying. i told him, and he gave me a hug saying "that guys a dick, don't listen to him." so it seems to me that for every jerk, they seem to draw the "nice guys" to them as friends.Jonatron said:
why is that? or more, why will no guy hit on me? it's obvious i'm not doing anything. i sit in an open room all day at the student center @ college, and not one guy stops to say hi, or find out if i'm single. maybe if i wore a shirt saying "hit on me!" or "stop and talk, i'm free
sorry about the huge quote, but in my experience, (being a nice guy myself) nice guys are often shy... and very self-conscious. the nicer the guy, the more likely he's been taken advantage of and/or lead on by a vindictive ex, and so they write off all but the *most* obvious signals as friendly flirtation, and don't know where to go from there.dragoness said:hmmm, let me think. maybe. smiling, checking them out in the halls. waving. giving them hugs. oh yea, there was that one guy, who actually was an a-hole, who decided that it would be hilarious to say to me "no one here likes you, why do you keep hanging out here?" after i'd hung out with him(giving him hugs, and offering to be a cuddle buddy)/his roomie/and like 3 other people for like a month. i packed up my comp and went somewhere else. needless to say, one of the 3 other people stopped to see why i was crying. i told him, and he gave me a hug saying "that guys a dick, don't listen to him." so it seems to me that for every jerk, they seem to draw the "nice guys" to them as friends.Jonatron said:
why is that? or more, why will no guy hit on me? it's obvious i'm not doing anything. i sit in an open room all day at the student center @ college, and not one guy stops to say hi, or find out if i'm single. maybe if i wore a shirt saying "hit on me!" or "stop and talk, i'm free
LOL. i've given up on hanging out with women. reason: all they care to talk about is 1. shopping, 2. that cute guy (he's not cute!), 3. how soon their next baby is due, 4. does this make me look fat?, 5. i need a new pair of (insert clothing article here), 6. etc. yea. i got sick of that. my last female friend moved off to another version of the same college. as for a male friend, he lives a few states away. i used to fall into a few cliques in highschool. but once i hit college, everything meshed together, and no one picked on me anymore. ^_^ and i have yet to see an alpha male. more like alpha p***ies.Jonatron said:
I so second this. Seriously, Vidiot, do you know me?Vidiot said:sorry about the huge quote, but in my experience, (being a nice guy myself) nice guys are often shy... and very self-conscious. the nicer the guy, the more likely he's been taken advantage of and/or lead on by a vindictive ex, and so they write off all but the *most* obvious signals as friendly flirtation, and don't know where to go from there.dragoness said:hmmm, let me think. maybe. smiling, checking them out in the halls. waving. giving them hugs. oh yea, there was that one guy, who actually was an a-hole, who decided that it would be hilarious to say to me "no one here likes you, why do you keep hanging out here?" after i'd hung out with him(giving him hugs, and offering to be a cuddle buddy)/his roomie/and like 3 other people for like a month. i packed up my comp and went somewhere else. needless to say, one of the 3 other people stopped to see why i was crying. i told him, and he gave me a hug saying "that guys a dick, don't listen to him." so it seems to me that for every jerk, they seem to draw the "nice guys" to them as friends.Jonatron said:
why is that? or more, why will no guy hit on me? it's obvious i'm not doing anything. i sit in an open room all day at the student center @ college, and not one guy stops to say hi, or find out if i'm single. maybe if i wore a shirt saying "hit on me!" or "stop and talk, i'm free
As a general rule, the nice guys will be nervous as hell, but will treat you with more respect than you'd think was possible before giving one a chance.
