What is worst attempt at attracting the opposite sex you've ever seen?

[Straitjacketeering]

I would like to buy your friend a completely platonic drink for her awesomeness.

Better then what I did, I turned to her and said 'I love you' and then had to dodge a punch.

I will also be wearing a helmet and a cup to this drink-buying.

I hate it when guys think that being overly sexual and perverted will make chicks dig them, Just make them sounds like virgins if you ask me.

Fun fact: Being a virgin is more attractive than being incredibly promiscuious.
To me, anyway. Though I agree with you.

Virgins are fine, Desperate virgins aren't. If they are guys. Anyhoo.

 

[ace_of_something]

I've seen a known Child rapist/murderer come on to a nurse by saying "Are you here to check my heart? Cuz it's going crazy!"
She replied "say it again and don't expect any of your needed meds for a day."

 

[Nightex]

My buddies brother tried and screwed up the "i'm an space pilot wanna ride my rocket ship." line... the more disturbing thing was that the girl went home with him anyway. Never did understand how he managed to pull that off.

 

[Shadow Law]

Basicly anything I see on online MMORPGs when male avatars hit on female avatars (even when most of the time the female avatars are guys in real life)

 

[Flour]

Not a real attempt, but I don't care:

 

[Natey80]

This kid at my school brings in baked goods every week and doesn't give any food to the guys until all of the girls that he likes have had some. That's probably the worse i have ever seen =P

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

Worst attempt i've seen? Well, someone I know (who absolutely no one likes, they just don't tell him that) walked up to someone, and in all confidence said 'get yer coat love, you've pulled'. I have never seen anyone get slapped so hard. And I didn't think people actually used these lines anyway.

Other than this I can think of one other horrific attempt.

Well, I play in a band, and we were playing live, and our lead singer dedicated a song to a girl he'd been trying to hit on for a year. The worst bit about is that the song was actually about war. Way to make an arse out of yourself in front of 200 people.

 

[Zildjin81]

I once played football in elementary school during gym class and the guy who played quarterback for the other team only passed to the girl he liked. I'm serious, the whole game.

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

My buddies brother tried and screwed up the "i'm an space pilot wanna ride my rocket ship." line... the more disturbing thing was that the girl went home with him anyway. Never did understand how he managed to pull that off.

Probably by being extremely beautiful.

 

[Rolling Thunder]

I generally try to look innocent. Which fails, mainly because I'm jaundiced and cynical by nature....

 

[fix-the-spade]

I once saw this wigger kid try to hit on a girl at my school.
Picture a... maybe 90 pounds-when-wet white kid, about 5 feet tall in clothes that would fit a 6 foot tall man who weighed 900 pounds walking up to a pretty blonde girl.
"Hey baby, what'chu lookin' at."
"Excuse me?"
"Come on, baby, I know you want me."
"Uh..."
(Also, he was making these weird facial expressions...like he was trying to kiss the air or something. And he kept grabbing his crotch. It was the perfect showing of class.)
"*****, you know you be wantin' me." (Swear to god, his exact words.)
She just walked away with her friends.
I have no clue what the fuck his issue was.

Wiggerism, a common psychiatric condition in undereducated middle or working class children from low crime backgrounds. An over exposure to hip hop leads the sufferer to believe they are in fact from downtown Los Angeles, weigh 500lbs, carry a small arsenal of weaponry and are employed as a drug dealer.
Notoriously difficult to treate, Wiggerism has been shown to naturally recede between the ages of 18-25. Although in extreme cases symptoms persist throughout life, this more serious condition is known as Westwooditis.
For reasons unknown, Wiggerism and Westwooditis are known to only affect children of Caucasian or Asian backgrounds.


My worst:
"I've only got one piercing, bet you can't find it..."
Surprisingly, it worked.

 

[gibboss28]

"Hey i'm drunk want to come back to my tent?"

Said by a friend of mine to another friend of mine at a music festival. for some reason it was just hilarious.

 

[Pirce]

Hmm oh I know. Some friends and I were over at another friends apartment hanging out. She was on her laptop chatting with this guy in her class in between the two of us going over some art. Suddenly the guy she was chatting with goes "Hey I have something to say...I really like you, I want you. Will you have dinner with me this Friday?". Of course this isn't the worst attempt, I suppose it's a fairly decent one all in all. It was the response to his attempts that made it so bad.

After he said this me and her glanced at each other, started to snicker which caused everyone else to come over, they started to snicker, then we all burst out laughing. After we had calmed down a bit the guy suddenly opened the door and said "So?" to which case we all burst out laughing even harder and longer.

 

[OneHP]

Friend: "I'm and electrical engineer, wanna fuck me?"
I don't know what the response was as I was laughing to hard to watch.

Another friend said this to the most attractive girl in the club, she's dressed in a slutty santa outfit: "I feel like Chris de Burgh, wanna be my lady in red?"
He got her number, we were in awe for the rest of the night.

 

[P1p3s]

my mate bought a chat up line book when he was about 15 and worked his way through them, once he said to me (and i have to HOPE it was in jest)
G: Is that a ladder in your tights or just my stair way to heaven
M: <dead pan - blank face> I'm wearing jeans

criiikey that was all manner of wrong

 

[Sparrow]

A generally nice guy tried to chat up some girl at my old school do. This is exactly what happened:

"Hey babe."
"Don't talk to me, dick."

I laughed in his face.

 

[Eagle Est1986]

my mate bought a chat up line book when he was about 15 and worked his way through them, once he said to me (and i have to HOPE it was in jest)
G: Is that a ladder in your tights or just my stair way to heaven
M: <dead pan - blank face> I'm wearing jeans

criiikey that was all manner of wrong

Funny, I think I bought a very similar book when I was his age. My favourite pick up line from it was;
"You'll do."
I still haven't been drunk/stupid enough to use it, one day though.