What would video game hell look like?

[Vrex360]

I've been thinking very spiritually in the past few days and I've always wondered... if video games had a sort of 'afterlife' a place where all games go once their franchise has been discontinued or once the console it was on has bit the dust what would it be like?
I imagine that if a franchise was good (Halo, Silent Hill, Half Life, Bioshock, Prince of Persia, Metal Gear Solid, Mario etc) it would go to a nice video game heaven. Where all gameplay is completely glitch free and the graphics are finely detailed and the gaming community is all smart sophisticated witty and caring individuals.
But now I ask what about the logical opposite?
If a franchise was bad and was sent to the lake of fire for video games what would it be like? Would it be populated by the worst consoles like the Virtual boy and the Jaguar? Would hard drives be melting everywhere? Would everything be glitchy and unplayable?
Would Uwe Boll be the Satan of this nightmare?

What do you reckon a video game hell would look like?

(please keep trolling to a minimum, hell has enough fire already without people starting flame wars.)

 

[Artemis923]

I've been thinking very spiritually in the past few days and I've always wondered... if video games had a sort of 'afterlife' a place where all games go once their franchise has been discontinued or once the console it was on has bit the dust what would it be like?
I imagine that if a franchise was good (Halo, Silent Hill, Half Life, Bioshock, Prince of Persia, Metal Gear Solid, Mario etc) it would go to a nice video game heaven. Where all gameplay is completely glitch free and the graphics are finely detailed and the gaming community is all smart sophisticated witty and caring individuals.
But now I ask what about the logical opposite?
If a franchise was bad and was sent to the lake of fire for video games what would it be like? Would it be populated by the worst consoles like the Virtual boy and the Jaguar? Would hard drives be melting everywhere? Would everything be glitchy and unplayable?
Would Uwe Boll be the Satan of this nightmare?

What do you reckon a video game hell would look like?

(please keep trolling to a minimum, hell has enough fire already without people starting flame wars.)

It would look like E.T.

 

[Spacelord]

Shaq Fu with a burgeoning slash fic culture.

 

[GodsOneMistake]

It be the Cortana level in Halo 3 over and over again ahhh

 

[Jamous]

Computers would be forced onto constant overclock with no heat-sync. Ummm.... What else...?
Oh yeah, each character from the game would have their programming rewritten so that they'd be in a constant paradox of some form, and they'd be in a constant escort mission. With one life so that when they die they instantly restart from the beginning.
And they'd be forced to go through the constant portal, falling forever, before they could start again. Could imagine how horrible that'd feel? Except Portal was fucking awesome, so it wouldn't be in video game hell anyways.

 

[More Fun To Compute]

A new Army Men game every day that you are forced to play through before you can eat breakfast.

 

[Doomdiver]

It would be in the middle of a desert... With a long seemingly never ending road... Every 8 hours a bus goes past.

 

[Aura Guardian]

Vrex360, You make the most interesting threads.
Anywho. It'd be a plain stage

 

[A random person]

There would be rabid fanboy's all over the place. These games would have to suffer through their sins of dragged out fetch quests and repetitive level design. And the games would be subject to the torture of angry stupid parents and politicians. Uwe Boll would make the games see themselves as crappy movies. The games would be chained up by the Yaoi succubi and forced into compromising scenarios. And there would be the greatest horror of all, beyond the lake of flamewars and shrieks of fanboys and fangirls, a fate of absolute doom: The Tails Doll.

 

[Vrex360]

Oh new idea for this hell.

All the horrible monsters and foul demons living in this hellhole would be the most annoying and frustrating enemies in gaming.
Like the flood pure forms from Halo 3 and the the Bloodmounts from Gears 2 and the Geth stalkers from Mass effect and any other enemies I missed out on. Combine that with the horrid gameplay ideas you guys are coming up with and this hell would be nasty.

 

[AkJay]

Sonic 3D, as far as the eye can see!

 

[AkJay]

It would be the coolest place you could imagine, a place you just want to roam free and explore for hours. Only to find the horrific truth that the place is covered in invisible walls.

Fallout 3?

 

[irishdelinquent]

Video game hell would be some form of a combination of the Blue Screen of Death, the 3 Red Rings of Death, E.T, Chase the Chuckwagon, Jack Thompson, and the PS3

 

[A random person]

Sonic 3D, as far as the eye can see!

Combine that with stupid new characters and doll versions of all of them, not to mention human-hedgehog romance, and you got yourself a place of eternal torment.

The Adventure games were pretty ok, though, IMO.

 

[toasterslayer]

japanese writers surrond the outside while you try to chainsaw you way through invisable walls! only to find your where killed by the guardians and it starts all over again!

 

[ProfessorLayton]

Sonic would have to continue running in a circle forever.

Portal (even though it's a good game) would have you in an infinite portal loop.

Pokemon would spawn a whole bunch of legendary pokemon... but the thing is you can't catch any of them no matter how hard you try.

 

[killjoyfuly]

halo would have a 3rd sequal


oh wait

 

[GreigKM]

Myst V except the main character is Sonic who always talks in a horrific 4kids voice over and Esher is replaced by Rick Astley, also there is nothing but quick-time events.