What's the best advice you've ever recieved?

[chiggerwood]

If she'll fuck you she'll fuck everybody.-Mom

Only fight if you have to.-Mom

If you get hit, hit harder.-Mom

Don't flop your dick around if you're not ready for kids.-Mom

If you get thrown in jail don't waste your phone call on me, 'cause I ain't comin'.-Mom

Do crossword puzzles they'll stave off senility.-Mom

 

[Miss_M]

The best piece of advise I know is Pearl Jam lyric:

You can spend your time alone redigesting past regrets. Or you can come to terms and realise that you're the only one who cannot forgive yourself. It makes much more sense to live in the present tense.

Well it certainly makes sense to me!

 

[Vkmies]

"Forget it" and "kill yourself" are ones that i would love to commit if i would have the bravery.

 

[Jharry5]

'Keep your head held high; you've got just as much reason to be here and be proud of it than anyone else'.
My mum, after a particularly bad case of bullying at school. Those words have always stuck with me.

 

[SnarkyNinja]

"Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs Italian, the mechanics German, the lovers French, and it's all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is where the police are German, the chefs are British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss, and it is all organized by the Italians."

If this doesn't make you want to go to heaven, then you're probably an atheist.

 

[Zacky]

Smile, forgive everyone and don't be a dick - My Dad (a good man)

 

[HT_Black]

"DUCK!"
~shouted by a stranger whom I never saw again as an 80-mile fastball was flying at my head

 

[quiet_samurai]

"Trust me dude, that's not a chick."

 

[orangebandguy]

'Get the fuck over it.'

Brilliant advice on alot of occasions.

 

[Mistermixmaster]

Wish I had received any advice from anyone during my life so far... would have made it a helluva lot easier than to learn everything from my own faults. The only advice I've ever received are the ones from various loading screens in games, and they don't really work out that well in real life...

 

[electric discordian]

Never under any circumstances underestimate the lengths of human stupidity and the depths of human depravity.

If you are going to phone in sick from work don't post on Facebook your going fishing.

If you do the above don't sign your supervisor up as a Facebook friend and post where your going so he can track you down at lunchtime and he can throw you in the canal. (By you I mean one of my minions and by supervisor I mean me.)

No matter how hard you work and how well you do something your boss will always find fault in it.

Always leave an obvious and simple to solve fault in your work to distract your boss from a harder and ultimately more pointless activity!

 

[x0ny]

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"

I'm not a Christian, but this has always stuck with me, plus I just don't want to be a dick to the people around me, it gains me allies as opposed to enemies. Allies are always useful, you just don't know when.

 

[GhostKnifeFish]

"Know Thyself"