whats the most ignorant thing one of your teachers have said?

[RadiusXd]

well, nothing igrorant as such, nor anything on par with the other ignorant teachers mentioned here.
But i did have a math teacher who should have been teaching sports, and he graded our tests wrong.
in particular he thought in order to find the area of an ellipse, you took the longest and shortest DIAMETERS for the equation, instead of the correct using of the two RADIUS'.
even upon my explanation of his mistake, and showing that his way of doing it was wrong, even with a diagram, he refused to concede.
I ended up going to my favorite math teacher, whom i had for the past two years before him, and confirmed my observations with him and having him break the news to my teacher.
I guess sometimes teachers just don't like being wrong at all, thats why i love my science teacher this year. at the start of semester he made us right a list of things that aren't always right, with my teacher, and science (current) being included on that list

 

[Pikeperch]

My history (geography that year) teacher thought that Central America and "Eurasia" were continents.
I shit you not.

Eurasia is a continent.
It all depends on what convention you use, since there, to my knowledge,isn't any strict definition.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Continents

 

[The Last Hunter]

Well once, I had a teacher say that plastic bottles produce female hormones, and that drinking from your average bottle was going to turn you into a pansy

And another time, the same teacher said that margarine is one molecule away from scotch-tape


True. Fucking. Stories

 

[Tattaglia]

One of my high school teachers was really stupid. She overheard a conversation between myself and a friend about an American woman supposedly finding a finger in her McDonalds burger.

"Do they have McDonalds in America?"

Our first reaction was laughter, but soon turned to horror as she remained blank-faced, still waiting for the answer.

"Uh... yeah."

Another time, same teacher:

"What plant does wool come from?"

"You mean cotton?"

"No, no, wool."

It's especially bad considering New Zealand has more sheep than people - eleven million to four, in fact. A quarter of our economy is agricultural export, so... yeah.

My history (geography that year) teacher thought that Central America and "Eurasia" were continents.
I shit you not.

Eurasia is a continent.
It all depends on what convention you use, since there, to my knowledge,isn't any strict definition.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Continents

Eurasia isn't a continent, it's a nation that we are at WAR with!!

Hang on, aren't we allied? Maybe that was Eastasia. Shit, which super-nation are we again?

 

[Layz92]

It is not really a statement per se but a sentiment. A girl in my class successfully tore my english teacher a new on with legitimate arguments. One after the other nailed every bit of resistance the teacher put up. The sentiment that made me shake my head (and still does when I hear it) is the "for I am a teacher and you are a student so I must be right" idea that every teacher maintains. Same girl also successfully argued with my modern history teacher too. She is very good at debating when she is passionate about something.

 

[Evil the White]

My teacher once said that JFK wasn't a good leader because he was killed. Ya we spent the rest of the lesson telling her just how retarded she actually was

I have to agree that JFK was a lousy president but not because he was killed, but because he really didn't do anything.

OT: I have a teacher tell me the civil war started over slavery, he also said the UN had never been in any wars as all and was nothing but pure win(not what he said but it's basically what he meant).

Don't forget that he basically encouraged the Veitnamise generals to have a hostile takeover, which left the South Koreans weak and leaderless and with no strong powerbase, making them an easy target for the rest of the war.

Plus the missile crisis, trying to stop the mafia while sleeping with a don's partner... the list goes on.

It was a fun history essay.

 

[me.vicky]

English Prof: *is writing on the board* and so we see the subject is me and the verb is calling and the direct object is my mother.
Random guy: Sir, why would you be calling your mother?
EP: I don't know. I want to know her recipe for vichyssoise.
*blank stares from class*
EP: Vichyssoise is a kind of soup. *writes it on board* Wait, that doesn't look right. *tries again* Okay, sorry, I don't know how to spell it.
Me: Vichyssoise is spelled V-I-C-H-Y-S-S-O-I-S-E.
*blank stares from everyone*
EP: Thank you, Victoria. How do you know that?
Me: *bright smile* I learned it from playing a video game.

(this only makes sense in context: Earlier, I turned in a paper I wrote about how we can learn things from gaming and he called me into his office to tell me I was, in his opinion, full of shit)

(the game was Animal Crossing: Wild World, by the way)

 

[TobiasMP]

1. 3 years ago i had a geography teacher who tried to learn us about "zee weer" (translated to english: the weather above the sea), but she had a really weird accent and everyone thought it was weird we were being taught about "zeewier" ("Seaweed").

2. I always like to get personal with my teachers and talk to them when I'm bored (the class loves me for distracting them from teaching) once my history teacher said; "No i still haven't examined the test of last week, my husband suprised me this weekend and we've been fucking most of the time." Only after that she realised she was still talking to a student

3. My math teacher; "You know...I would really like you to meet my daughter" (for all who are curious about what happened afterwards; he told me his daughter was 14, and as a 17 year old i rejected the offer)

4. My economics teacher is always telling us how much money he earns, how smart he is, how many people respect him and how many ladies he had seduced. He uses as excuus that everything is connected with the economy. "I was sitting at a restaurant with a friend of mine. Suddenly he told me that a girl was looking at me. That girl apperantly thought i was a good looking man and my friend told me she really liked me. That's also very important when dealing with economics; you'll have to be able to make connections with people!"

or from the same guy;
"A friend of mine started his own business and i had send him a text; that if he sold products that people would want to buy for a decent price and it all goes to plan, he would be succesful. And yes, now he's making his first profits!"
The worst thing is; most of the class is dumb enough to think this means he can predict the future or can give advice of real meaning.

and another one from the same guy!;
I missed a test and the day after that i go to him; "sir i missed the test yesterday, could I do it tomorrow?"
teacher: "mmmm, I have another class in a couple of minutes, why don't you come back next week?" (cause saying 'okay' takes probably too much time for him)
-next week
"Sir, we are already starting with a new chapter, and i still have to make a test of the last one!"
teacher: "ah yes, more students needed to redo or still have to do that test, I will first talk to all of them too, so you can all do it at the same time"
-two weeks later and about 5 useless talks with this guy
"Sir we have the test of this chapter in 3 days! And I still have to do the test about the last one! You said this was an important test but i'm not going to learn two chapters at once because you refuse to give me the test!"
teacher, against the whole class now; "look children, this is what happens when you postpone your work. This student here still has to do a test about the first chapter while the test about the second is this week! If you need something done; you'll come to me, and I'll help you out! planning is very important!"

 

[Woodsey]

1. 3 years ago i had a geography teacher who tried to learn us about "zee weer" (translated to english: the weather above the sea), but she had a really weird accent and everyone thought it was weird we were being taught about "zeewier" ("Seaweed").

You teach someone, not learn them.

 

[yoda3d2]

1.(I was moon walking) "no running in the halls!"

2.(I talked back to my science teacher for something i forget) "ARE YOU CHALLENGING ME?"
me: "yes i think i would like to challenge you to a duel"

i fairly hate my school.

 

[NLS]

Uh... Wow, well... Being the Norwegian that I am, I have never experienced this. Because our teachers are supposed to keep personal opinions to themselves... And that we're pretty liberal from a US point of view.

This, our teachers sort of have to behave.
But I got some nice ones from my previous physics teacher:

*looks at pictures of the students to identify all the names and faces*
"Hey you! (let's just call this poor soul Bob) you're really a boy? Cause this picture definitively has a girl on it. No, just look at it!"
*proceeds to walk around and show off the old picture of Bob to the students*
"I'd say poll results would give off that 90% of the questioned would say this is a girl, just look at it! No offence to you, Bob, but this picture of you looks just like a girl."
People laugh a bit and stuff.

Later on:
"So one of the aspects of physics is for instance ballistic stuff blablablalba"
*teacher pulls out an airsoft handgun*
"Hey Bob, could you take a shot to the chest with this to prove you're a man? A girl couldn't do it, but I'm quite sure a man like you, Bob, could do it!"

 

[Loud Hawk]

I have had 2 douchebag teachers:

1. My english teacher at the age of 13 would always be racist towards my irish friend and she was beyond retarded. Example:

Friend: what do you think they do at area 51
Me: probably some secret weapons experiments with prototype technology
Friend: Yeah, that might be why they shoot you is you attempt to get to close.
Teacher: No, it is a place where they store toxic waste and theydo that to protect you1!
Me: they shoot us to protect us?
Teacher: Yes
Me:LOLWUT?!?!?!?!

2. My recent maths teacher was a fucking prick. He would actually call me a "Gay" and a "******" in class infront of the class for no reason. (I am not gay, he was the one that would sometimes lay on the table with his shity open during class.)He would also constantly blame me for everything, even one day I was not in the room, I was out getting something and I could hear "OLIVER SHUT THE FUCK UP, ******!" from the class. He would also call my friend a fucking retarded communist.

 

[Harlemura]

Uh... I can't think of anything. All my teachers seem to know their stuff.
My Geography teacher on a college induction day admitted he was dyslexic. Don't know if that counts.

 

[Baradiel]

There is a TERRIBLE history teacher in my school, who doesn't even have a degree in History. She told us that herself, but then again that doesn't mean it's right.

Just a few examples of her statements and why they are wrong;

1. Stalin and Lenin were best friends

Lenin promoted Stalin to the post of General Secretary. He then realised it was a mistake when he became ill from numerous strokes and Stalin became "Lenins Mouthpiece". In his Last Testament, Lenin recommended that Stalin be demoted because he was too dangerous.

2. Tsar Nicholas II's youngest daughter, Anastasia, survived the executions.

She basically thinks this because of the Disney film. I shit you not. Disreagrd scientific evidence, like the bullet-ridden skeleton and first hand accounts. Let cartoons, loosely based on history (often involving magic ) be the teachers of us all!

3. The atomic bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki wiped out two hundred THOUSAND miles of Earth...

This was a genuine facepalm.

 

[Hollock]

Well this isn't too bad but one of my teachers mixed up Thurgood Marshall with Strom Thurmond, and it took a lot of convincing to get him to get it straight.

 

[Soushi]

"The british didn't really do anything during WW2." A substitute Highschool History Teacher
.... huh?

"YOu're not here to be creative, you are here to learn." Canadian Studies Proffesor after i complained about a mark on my essay.
.... WHAT!!!

Teachers are not infalibal beings, as we all know. But it is hard to be one. They are sbject to an extremely strict moral code, ion both thier daily and proffesional lives, and yet they are treated like shit by teh students, the system and other teachers.

 

[wolf thing]

i was talking with my mate about wherther or not manhatten was an island. it is. to prove my point i asked are teacher during registration to look it up. about 5 minuets latter she came up to me and said that manhatten island was inland and was part a canada.

 

[Angerwing]

"Demonic possession is a reality."
"That woman had some serious demons in her." - Note, not metaphorical demons he's referring to.

"There is no doubt whatsoever that God is real."

And no, I don't live in Southern US, you assumption making buffoons. I'm from Australia.

 

[Downfall89]

My teacher INSISTED that Greece wasn't a part of Europe. I even pointed at the FUCKING MAP we had in the class, and she still wouldn't concede.

When did this happen? Which class?

OT: Probably last year in Greek. The teacher was simply a dud. She was trying to teach us about Troy and stuff, didn't even know the story herself, and kicked a kid out of the class for correcting her once. Good times.

Oh god, good times.

No no, this was in Primary School. I'm not joking when I said I got up and pointed to the map.