What's your favorite conspiracy theory?

[Thaluikhain]

I'm pretty sure it's a well known fact that the American government did something similar on December 7 of 1941.

It's a well known conspiracy theory, not a fact.

No, based on what I looked up and the history books I read it did actually happen, hell even the Japanese ambassador was held up for 3 something hours just so they could say japan attacked without a declaration of war, so that the Americans could look like victims.

My problem with that is that if the US government had advance warning, it should have alerted the forces at Pearl Harbour (and elsewhere).

They'd still be the victims, but they'd have taken much less damage and have been able to begin the war with a victory, rather than a defeat.

The Pacific fleet was of too great a strategic value to be used that way.

 

[MammothBlade]

I don't have a "favourite."I think several of them are plausible, but they have to be analysed from the bottom up and not the top down first. There are lies and conspiracies on the local level. You first see them in local police corruption, municipal oligarchy, small-time fraud, etc. Most of the conspiracies going on are not quite so bizarre as mind-control, genocide, or one world government - and not organised by one central conspiracy group, more localised corruption and negligence. Then you have larger conspiracies which can be attributed to profiteering and psychopathy, but which are subordinate to objectives.

Ruling elites do have goals, long-term objectives, and desires beyond winning the next election or maximising profit. The "official" narrative should always be second-guessed and scrutinised into context. This is not so much something most people don't know already. Yet let's not kid ourselves that the elite always have either selfish or benign objectives, or that deceit can't happen on a massive scale. Think about the WMD in Iraq scandal. It's no longer a stretch to say that it was a complete fabrication, yet people were accused of being batshit insane when they called it out for its bullshit.

I for one suspect that weapons scientist David Kelly [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Kelly_(weapons_expert)] was murdered by government order after turning whistleblower. The official story is dodgy, and several doctors have called out the findings of the dodgy Hutton "Inquiry". There was no And it is linked to the fabricated WMD dossier.

http://www.globalresearch.ca/was-david-kelly-murdered-on-the-orders-of-the-british-government/16434

Though I hate to upset anyone who thinks that "liberal democracy" protects from tyranny and persecution, even democratically elected governments assassinate their own citizens sometimes.

 

[albear]

The one that made me laugh the most was when somebody told me that during the cold war the russians introduced the "GAY" into Sanfrancisco in an attempt to slowly wipe out the American population, they truly believed this and were quoting articles and one of their 'contacts' in russia who had proof.

 

[DrBonBon]

I used to enjoy the 9/11 conspiracy, but when they started to say that the firefighters and the police who were at the scene are "on the payroll", it's stopped being funny and turned to being completely dickish.

 

[Bestival]

Mine is the one that all conspiracy theorists are working for the government, in a double bluff to bring out the truth in such a ludicrous way that no 'sane' person would ever believe it. This also means all conspiracy theories are actually correct.

 

[The Great Purtabo]

Religion.

C'mon people, it's the 21st century. How can people still believe in that mumbo jumbo?

If a human can program a videogame, why can't a higher order being program a universe?

Unless you were specifically referring to people who adamantly stick to the idea that EVERYTHING happened EXACTLY as their Holy Book says. Those people need to put down the Bible and pick up a freaking smartphone all damn ready.

No, I think he was being slightly facetious just to egg on creationists. Ah, the days where I used to do that...

 

[Slash2x]

The greatest trick of any cover up or lie is a simple one..... Just convince the public that it is a conspiracy. Make it a funny joke or attribute it to a crazy person and you could kill a person in public and the people will buy it was anything but the conspiracy. Why because anything labeled a conspiracy is obviously only the ranting of idiots.

 

[Acton Hank]

I'm pretty sure it's a well known fact that the American government did something similar on December 7 of 1941.

It's a well known conspiracy theory, not a fact.

No, based on what I looked up and the history books I read it did actually happen, hell even the Japanese ambassador was held up for 3 something hours just so they could say japan attacked without a declaration of war, so that the Americans could look like victims.

My problem with that is that if the US government had advance warning, it should have alerted the forces at Pearl Harbour (and elsewhere).

They'd still be the victims, but they'd have taken much less damage and have been able to begin the war with a victory, rather than a defeat.

The Pacific fleet was of too great a strategic value to be used that way.

The bulk of the Pacific fleet was already out at sea, the only ships at port were the ones that were either obsolete or strategically expendable.

8 battleships were damaged, out of those 8, 4 were repaired and 4 were sunk, out of the 4 that were sunk 2 were raised; so in total, 6 out of 8 battleships were back in the war later.
Most of the damage was done to grounded aircraft, which considering how much of that was being sold to Britain at the time, it's a safe bet they had no shortage of.

Not exactly what I would call a crushing defeat, sure they lost around 2,500 men but after the attack around a million men volunteered for military service. You think that many people would have jumped in if the Americans had won at Pearl Harbor?

 

[Gene O]

Here's my favorite theory: The Masons are a red herring. Their glory days are long past and they spend their time getting together relive their (long) past triumphs and hoping that The Benevolent and Protective Order of Elks doesn't pay any serious attention to them because that's who's really running things.

This theory doesn't have any support, really. Just me and my brother. And if you think the theory looks weak on the surface just wait until you hear our arguments to support it. Then you'll really roll your eyes.

Still, it lets us make jokes about the Elks and we get a good laugh. That's why it's my favorite.

 

[IanDavis]

By far, my favorite is the Denver Airport. It's awesome because it's even more random then most conspiracy theories. Theories range from it looking like a swastika, to there being Holocaust bunkers below ground to gas large numbers of people at a time.

Like all good conspiracies, they left evidence behind pointing to their magnificent plans. First, the murals in the terminals OBVIOUSLY have secret meanings behind them. Second, the evil demon horse statue out front:

Even better, the guy who crafted that statue was killed when it fell on him. Frankly, I think that horse is behind everything, from JFK to 9/11.

 

[crooky]

Nazi's in Antarctica.

Classic.

 

[Eddie the head]

Creationism. Zing. But yeah that and the Flat Earth Society.

 

[thesilentman]

Flat Earth and the Illuminati never fail to crack me up when I discuss with my friends on 'why conspiracy theories can be simultaneously bullshit and darkly funny at the same time.'

The one that made me laugh the most was when somebody told me that during the cold war the russians introduced the "GAY" into Sanfrancisco in an attempt to slowly wipe out the American population, they truly believed this and were quoting articles and one of their 'contacts' in russia who had proof.

"Rubs eyes a couple of times and checks the OP's post date." Did I... actually write that? If not, that, sure as hell is pretty out there.

 

[RufusMcLaser]

When I was in grammar school and wasn't so great at critical thinking, I did a lot of reading on fringe topics and that certainly included conspiracies of every sort. My favorite off-the-wall batshit crazy conspiracy theory is the "Phantom Time Hypothesis. [skeptoid.com/episodes/4332]" According to this school of thought, someone (the Roman Catholic Church?) falsified several centuries of Western history and we're actually living in the year 1715 AD. Other variants claim other gaps. They're all demonstrably drivel thanks to contiguous worldwide records of certain events such as supernovae, so it's got little value beyond entertainment.

Conspiracy theories tend towards mental junk food. Too often they offer a form of unfalsifiable self-gratification by letting the adherents think that they alone know what's going on around here. Eventually you start chasing mice in your head because there's no evidence for your pet theory and IT JUST GOES TO SHOW HOW POWERFUL THEY AREfnord.

One to close on, from the hilarious (but not really your cup of tea) Illuminatus! [http://www.pauladaunt.com/books/Illuminatus/Wilson,%20Robert%20Anton%20&%20Shea,%20Robert%20-%20The%20Illuminatus!%20Tril.html] trilogy by Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea:

"You're trying to convince yourself, not me. Barney, it sticks out so far that you could break it into three pieces and each one would be long enough to goose somebody up in the Bronx. There is a secret society that keeps screwing up international politics. Every intelligent person has suspected that at one time or another. Nobody wants war any more, but wars keep happening-why?"

 

[Mr. Omega]

Time Cube. That being said, all the recent conspiracies the GOP has been coming up with in the past few months have been priceless...

Green Arrow: Don't listen to this guy, everything's conspiracies with him.
The Question: Not "conspiracies". Conspiracy. Singular.

Question: The plastic tips at the ends of shoelaces are called aglets. Their true purpose is sinister!

You, sir, are a gentleman and a scholar. I tip my hat to you.

 

[Something Amyss]

To a certain extent means for example that I'm not against the idea that the American government would let 3000 people die to justify an invasion of certain middle eastern countries so they could obtain oil and build army bases. I'm pretty sure it's a well known fact that the American government did something similar on December 7 of 1941.

I'm not against the idea of the faked Moon Landing because the It's pretty clear that the only reason America was involved in the space race was out of a dick waving contest with the Soviet Union, and the fact that NASA pretty much went to shit right after 1969.

As for Area 51, well why the fuck not? With all the religions on this planet why are UFO believers getting all the ridicule?

See, I personally wouldn't count "it's not impossible that they might do this" as believing a conspiracy theory.

As for the last one, I agree. UFOs are far less ridiculous than a Cosmic Skydaddy who is concerned about your day-to-day life. That doesn't mean I believe in aliens inherently, but I'm certainly more open to the possibility of life somewhere else in this universe than I am in any given deity.

Also, I'm not actually mentally disinclined to believe in a higher power, but that goes back to the same point: The fact that I don't disbelieve doesn't make me a believer.

 

[Acton Hank]

To a certain extent means for example that I'm not against the idea that the American government would let 3000 people die to justify an invasion of certain middle eastern countries so they could obtain oil and build army bases. I'm pretty sure it's a well known fact that the American government did something similar on December 7 of 1941.

I'm not against the idea of the faked Moon Landing because the It's pretty clear that the only reason America was involved in the space race was out of a dick waving contest with the Soviet Union, and the fact that NASA pretty much went to shit right after 1969.

As for Area 51, well why the fuck not? With all the religions on this planet why are UFO believers getting all the ridicule?

See, I personally wouldn't count "it's not impossible that they might do this" as believing a conspiracy theory.

As for the last one, I agree. UFOs are far less ridiculous than a Cosmic Skydaddy who is concerned about your day-to-day life. That doesn't mean I believe in aliens inherently, but I'm certainly more open to the possibility of life somewhere else in this universe than I am in any given deity.

Also, I'm not actually mentally disinclined to believe in a higher power, but that goes back to the same point: The fact that I don't disbelieve doesn't make me a believer.

That's why I said to a certain extent, there are some conspiracies I firmly believe in, some I acknowledge as being possible and others I think are bullshit.

I count the flat earth society an reptilian people among the bullshit.

 

[Owyn_Merrilin]

My favorite one is this huge one called "The Montauk Project." It's a huge, interwoven conspiracy theory about various secret government projects involving time travel, teleportation, and grey aliens. It's the only conspiracy theory I've ever heard of that involves Mark Hamill (yes, /that/ Mark Hamill) going back in time to work with his dad on a secret navy project. It's just too awesomely hilarious not to love.

 

[THE_JOKE_KING33]

The theory that states that the entire world is shaped and ran by a few people so high up that most world leaders don't even know they exist.

 

[blipblop]

the zeitgeist one and the venus project it has turnd a lot of sane people to utter morons.
it's marvelous hilarious