when is the right time tell kids about sex

[Gramzon]

Around the onset of puberty, probably. Although, in this day and age, most kids already know anyway.

well yeah, I heard a conversation between my 8 year old sister and one of her friends about sex and what they thought about it, the rest of that story i will keep to myself.

 

[gentleben]

Your mom bought you Hustler as well?

Not quite. I dont remember what it was called but I do recall that there were alot of illustrations. One of them being a sperm wearing a top hat and carrying flowers.

That sounds like 'where did I come from?', it was one in a series with 'what's happening to me?'.

I'm going to tell my kids about sex as soon as they ask.

 

[MercenaryCanary]

When they start asking questions.

Me and my sister asked my mom about sex when we were fairly young, I was 7 and she was... 4? Yeah. I think it was 4.

Anyway, we asked questions about where babies came from, she told us, and then she went into extreme detail about the act of sex itself, about the clitoris, vaginal stimulation, oral sex, anal sex, vaginal sex, the effects of pornography, masturbation, the emotion that is involved with sex, how prostitutes should be legal, safe sex, how the man is bringing you down, the women being on top, sex toys, sexually transmitted diseases, condoms, etc....

We grew up a lot that day. But we at least we didn't grow up fucking stupid like this one kid I know. He's about 10, and his mom says she won't tell him anything about the subject until he's 14. I'm 14. That kid is going to be a bit fucked up in a year or two if he doesn't learn anything about the subject. Anyway, a good example of this, is he'll ask you if you would like to blow him. He thinks it means to go to the playground.

....

 

[MercenaryCanary]

Well that depends on the child.

When they've reach an age/level of maturity where the possibility of them having sex is there

This! I really think as soon as a kid asks about it that they should be educated about it. Whether you sit them down or do what my mother did (buy a book).

Your mom bought you Hustler as well?

No, she wanted us to be classy. She bought Barely Legal.

 

[Naeo]

What with the internet and all, they'll probably find out before you can tell them anyways.

 

[MercenaryCanary]

Your mom bought you Hustler as well?

Not quite. I dont remember what it was called but I do recall that there were alot of illustrations. One of them being a sperm wearing a top hat and carrying flowers.

:O Find this book now! If it has this:

One of them being a sperm wearing a top hat and carrying flowers.

Then I totally want that!
http://www.fmft.net/Top%20Hat.jpg

 

[Bernzz]

Your mom bought you Hustler as well?

Not quite. I dont remember what it was called but I do recall that there were alot of illustrations. One of them being a sperm wearing a top hat and carrying flowers.

In primary school, year 6 and 7, we did sex ed. We remember Steve the Sperm, who won over the egg. Man that was funny.

 

[Anachronism]

When they are old enough to ask.

This is pretty much all there is to it. If they're mature enough to want to know, and will be able to understand, then that's the right time to tell them. They should know about it, so they hopefully won't get too screwed up later on. Of course, they should be told about all of the possible risks as well, once again to try and stop them from being idiots and ruining their lives. Now, while this is the right way to go about it, what happened to me was the following:

NEVER. I'll just let my kids work it out. My parents have avoided mentioning it to me ever.

I will tell my kids about it, but for the same reason that you won't: because I never had any guidance or information from my parents whatsoever. Oh sure, they bought me a book, but I had to figure out pretty much all of it on my own. This has probably helped contribute to my mental state today, and I don't intend for my kids to be as messed up as I am.

 

[cobra_ky]

i think it's silly to try and set an age in advance. you have to take these things as they come, and discuss with your partner when to take initiative and start talking to your kids if they don't ask.

 

[historybuff]

I never asked my parents about sex. They're the controlling, authoritative types and if I had asked--they would have assumed I was having sex and flipped their shit.

It's just as embarrassing for kids as it can be for adults.

Adults need to step up and make their opinions known by, at least, your first year in high school. If not before. When you're 14 or 15 and everyone is starting to experiment. That's when kids need to know and they need to know their parents' views on it.

Putting the responsibility of asking first on a kid is sort of ridiculous. Because some of them will just never ask.

 

[Gramzon]

I never asked my parents about sex. They're the controlling, authoritative types and if I had asked--they would have assumed I was having sex and flipped their shit.

It's just as embarrassing for kids as it can be for adults.

Adults need to step up and make their opinions known by, at least, your first year in high school. If not before. When you're 14 or 15 and everyone is starting to experiment. That's when kids need to know and they need to know their parents' views on it.

Putting the responsibility of asking first on a kid is sort of ridiculous. Because some of them will just never ask.

I don't think they will, im 18 years old and have a girlfriend, and they still think im that 12 year old boy that goes out to se a friend then come back about 8 in the evening

 

[traceur_]

When they figure out how to use google, I'm just going to write out a list of things for them to search and let them go.

Way less awkward that way.

 

[Sigel]

Hmm...Dunno. I guess it depends on the child. I kinda just figured it out. It is not like it isn't shoved into your face by all different kinds of media. My sisters were told about it I think around 9 or 10 years old.

 

[Gramzon]

When they figure out how to use google, I'm just going to write out a list of things for them to search and let them go.

Way less awkward that way.

yeah, but google works in mysterious ways.
What if your kid ends up on some sick and twisted site about either animal porn or scat porn.
how are you going to explain that for your kid?

 

[dallan262]

i would say when i started to hear about it ...which was sometime in primary 5 so i would be about 8-9 ( for those of you who dont know the educational system in scotland )

 

[Osloq]

It would definitely be a case to case thing for me. One child could be mature enough to know it at 12 while the other might not until 14 in an extreme case. Wouldn't matter when I decide though. Sex on TV is getting to be so ridiculous they'll know more than me and I've had sex

 

[traceur_]

When they figure out how to use google, I'm just going to write out a list of things for them to search and let them go.

Way less awkward that way.

yeah, but google works in mysterious ways.
What if your kid ends up on some sick and twisted site about either animal porn or scat porn.
how are you going to explain that for your kid?

Send them to wikipedia and/or urban dictionary.

I figure by the time they got through my list they'd be desensitised enough.

 

[Jambolaty]

the time for the talk is before they find encyclopedia dramatica and think all sex is rape. And that rape is good. my childhood was ruined...

 

[vamp rocks]

uhhh... this is kinda tough... kids normally arent willing to talk to their parents about it and puberty hits at different ages for everyone.... i think sex ed shud be tought no later than 14 on the average male child... and i have no idea for females.... lol... but if a child manages to step up before then.... then he should be talked to