When you're sittin' on the john and the toilet paper's gone.....WHAT DO YOU DO!?

[Lullabye]

Much to my displeasure I find myself in a washroom with no toilet paper to speak of, and poo smudged all over ma butt am in the worst situation possible.
So escapists, have you ever found yourself in similarly dire situations? And what were your solutions to those situations?
I'll tell you my solution when I think of one.

 

[Wolfenbarg]

Sometimes I marvel at the complexity of intellectual arguments on this board. The level of discussion value even from relatively simple or non-controversial ideas is quite inspiring.

Other times...

 

[Marter]

Thankfully, there is some always under the sink right beside the toilet, so I've never been in this predicament before.

I'd probably call a family member if I was though. They'd help...probably.

 

[Eclectic Dreck]

If getting more toilet paper would require leaving the bathroom, I'd probably just take a shower instead.

 

[Brawndo]

Take a cup of water to the bathroom with you and wipe with your left hand like people from the Mideast

 

[RaphaelsRedemption]

Tissues in the pocket.

Always have a back up plan, especially in a public toilet.

 

[Jake the Snake]

Be a man. Use your hand.

 

[Pielikey]

Sacrifice magazines. Either that or use a towel or something.

If you're in a public restroom you're screwed, though.

 

[Lilani]

Sometimes I marvel at the complexity of intellectual arguments on this board. The level of discussion value even from relatively simple or non-controversial ideas is quite inspiring.

Other times...

And other times you go back to Neopets and adopt an Ixi or a Xweetok because they are much cooler than Chias

Anyway, if someone else is there I ask them for a roll. If not, I just shake what I can off and quickly partially button my pants and crab-walk to the next stall with toilet paper. And if there happens to be no TP anywhere...well I don't think I've ever come across that situation, but if I did I imagine I'd do my best to find the nearest one that does.

 

[Stormz]

Get up for 2 seconds to get another roll from the cupboard, if we don't have any at all we always have a box of tissues!

 

[burningdragoon]

1. Pull up pants
2. Find some
3. Return
4. Finish business
5. Profit?

 

[emeraldrafael]

If there's no other toilet paper around, or tissues, I grab an old ratty towel that we use for chemicals when we clean and just go to town. If thats not htere, you cut your losses and wipe with your underwear/boxers, get it all and hope you can find a new pair (if you're at home, all the better, if not, well, there's always walmart).

If there's nothing else at all, and you're stuck in a bind, you just let it dry and walk away. No point in trying with the hand, thats just disgusting and spreads Ecoli and is unhealthy in general. I mean, you just have to burn that hand after if you do that.

 

[silv]

Reach for some more

 

[Ham_authority95]

I light a match and burn it all off. The burn unit at the hospital needs something to do...

 

[lacktheknack]

Sometimes I marvel at the complexity of intellectual arguments on this board. The level of discussion value even from relatively simple or non-controversial ideas is quite inspiring.

Other times...

Don't knock it 'til the thread's over.

OT: Hair.

If there's nothing else at all, and you're stuck in a bind, you just let it dry and walk away. No point in trying with the hand, thats just disgusting and spreads Ecoli and is unhealthy in general. I mean, you just have to burn that hand after if you do that.

Don't tell people in the Middle East that...

 

[crudus]

I never have less than 3 rolls of toilet paper in the bathroom. So yeah, get another one. Although, I could take a shower.

 

[Nouw]

Nowadays in my toilet there are always 5-6 rolls of toilet paper =D but when I did need some I yelled my head off.

 

[Captain Bobbossa]

use your sleeve

 

[MetaMop]

Do you have a pet? If so, then...you know.

 

[Imp Poster]

If we are talking in terms of when that happens in your domile, Costco sells toilet paper by a year supply per person(and then some). Put some rolls near reaching distance of the tiolet.

If we are talking in terms of public restrooms, should always check to see if there is toilet paper before you are going to do #2. Some places have those rice paper seat covers, use that. Last resort, correlate the position of the toilet paper roll holder in your stall with the next stall. Assuming that the position of the tiolet paper roll holder should be the same location as it is in your stall, hopefully you can reach from underneath.