Where do babies come from?

[[Cold-Shoulder]]

This is your son Timmy. Focus all your rage into him.

Here is the scenario.
Seven years into the future, your life is a complete wreck after you got someone/got pregnant.
During the few years you had to raise Timmy by yourself.
In that time your dreams were shattered, you rarely have time for yourself and you've became slightly crazy/crazier.
One day in your miserable life, Timmy asked you where do babies come from.
What would you tell him?
By this time you'd have little or no contempt towards him at all so your most likely thought is "I'm going to mess up his world".
In your reply to his question you can you say you'll show him a video or book but do not set up any links to them.
Important note: This thread is just for fun and shouldn't be taken seriously in the slightest so relax and of course enjoy yourself.
P.S. The picture of the kid is not your Timmy.

 

[Cpt_Oblivious]

I'd tell Timmy. In graphic detail. I'd draw pictures and everything.

 

[Marine Mike]

P.S. Stands for Post-Script

 

[Rednog]

Alright Timmy I'll show you one way a mommy and daddy get a child.
LOOK BEHIND YOU TIMMY
*run away*
Hope you enjoy your new parents Timmy!

 

[Frequen-Z]

 

[Absimilliard]

]

P.P.S. What does P.S. stand for?

"Post Scriptum"
literally "Written After"

 

[DefunctTheory]

My children will have mastered google by the time they should be asking this question. The internet will provide all the parenting needs.

 

[ethaninja]

Hey kid... fuck you. kthxbye

 

[Z(ombie)fan]

timmy wouldnt ruin my dreams...

they are kinda low-scale...

anyway... i would tell him he REALLY doesnt want to know.

"yes i do!"

o rly?

"ya rly!"


*internet porn*

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

 

[fix-the-spade]

I would explain to him in detail the practical and social aspects of doing the bad thing.

All the evidence says that teaching kids about sex and relationships from as young as possible does in fact, not mess them up, but dramatically reduces their chance of becoming teenage parents.

As if it needed proving, the US has the highest teen preg rate in the developed world (more than double the UK's and we think it's bad here!), whilst also having the least sex education. Not that the bible bashers give two craps about that.

 

[ragestreet]

"Seto where do babies come from?"

"The same place as everything else. You buy them in a store."

 

[Absimilliard]

Hey kid... fuck you. kthxbye

I challenge any of you to find another situation where that would be a proper and civilised response in a forum...

 

[Mechsoap]

i hate kids, would say him that i threw you up after eating your mom...

 

[faceless chick]

the cabbage patch. now stop shifting through my porn collection!

 

[ethaninja]

Hey kid... fuck you. kthxbye

I challenge any of you to find another situation where that would be a proper and civilised response in a forum...

Haha, that would be quite the challenge indeed.

 

[NoblePhilistineFox]

they come from love,
and 'Love' is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope. Not many people could make such a shot, and strangely enough, not many people would derive love from it. Yet for me, love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticle, and together, achieving a singular purpose... against statistically long odds.

 

[[Cold-Shoulder]]

I would explain to him in detail the practical and social aspects of doing the bad thing.

All the evidence says that teaching kids about sex and relationships from as young as possible does in fact, not mess them up, but dramatically reduces their chance of becoming teenage parents.

As if it needed proving, the US has the highest teen preg rate in the developed world (more than double the UK's and we think it's bad here!), whilst also having the least sex education. Not that the bible bashers give two craps about that.

I'm well aware of that. I was asking what ways of telling him would scar him or at least make the next few weeks rather dramatic.
Thanks for the interesting fact.
I find it hard to imagine it. 0.0

 

[BlindMessiah94]

]snip snop snap

I don't know why, but looking at that picture freaks me out. Like that child is going to haunt me in my nightmares like a scary British girl used in a psychic experiment gone awry.

OT: The stork!

 

[Drakmeire]

I would say "when two teenagers think they're in love but actually just hormonal they make a giant 10 second mistake, which wouldn't be a problem but they're both too stupid to understand how latex and/or medication works and they have to pay an excess of 300,000 dollars on a slimy creature that will never live up to pay back that money and also steal 21 physical and emotional years from them" and that's why Daddy has this suitcase and a plane ticket marked "Tijuana" see ya kid!