Where to find a gamer girl?

[WhiteTigerShiro]

So I'm at a loss... here I am, in love with this hobby, but it's impossible to have a social life with it. Perhaps even worse, it seems impossible to find that special someone with whom I can enjoy the hobby together. Seems any girl I'm interested in, I basically have to settle for the fact that she'll just never get this important part of my lifestyle. She'll never understand my simple joys, my sorrows, or any of that. The biggest portion of my life, and it feels like it's completely closed-off to every woman I might date.

I guess there are conventions, sure. Entire events just flooded with people who would share that common interest. Only problem though is that those are just once a year, and the odds of meeting someone who lives in the same area as me are very slim. Less of a problem for people I plan to be just friends with, since we can just meet-up on Vent and play games and talk games. Heck, I have some friends down in Vegas whom I only see in person once a year, if even that often, but that's okay.

Keeping gamer friends online is easy. But a relationship? Long distance relationships are hell! I know, I've been there. Sure it's nice having that emotional support there. Someone to love, someone to really get to know, to basically share my life with, even if it is online... but eventually comes the point when you need the physical part of the relationship. Someone to cuddle-up with during a movie, or while gaming of course, the kissing, the intimacy in general.

Sorry if I seem to just be sadly rambling on, it's the mood I'm in right now. Though I still can't help but wonder, how does a gamer who wants someone with whom to share that part of his life find what he needs?

 

[Bertylicious]

I guess part of the problem is that many gamers are kind of homebodys. Am I right in thinking you're more of an inside person and would be looking for someone similar?

I dunno. Perhaps join loads of online communities so you can meet more people with similar personalities & interests and, perhaps, make a connection?

 

[EeveeElectro]

Cons/expos are at least once a month/every few months. I'm not sure what it's like in America, but in England, we have MCM expos which I go to at least 5 or 6 times a year. Then there's Kitacon, Thoughtbubble, Amecon amongst others. There's probably loads more in America.
They can be somewhat pricey though. Although I've found unless you're in cosplay, people tend to ignore you somewhat.

Websites like this are good too but if you go 'looking' for one you probably won't find one. Just because she's into games doesn't mean you'll get along.
If you find someone you really like who isn't a gamer, it's usually best to just accept them as they are. If we could all find our ideal partner, we'd be much happier but it doesn't always work like that.

 

[Thaluikhain]

Erm...going out of your way to find a "gamer girl" to like you?

Yeah, not likely to end well.

 

[WhiteTigerShiro]

Cons/expos are at least once a month/every few months. I'm not sure what it's like in America, but in England, we have MCM expos which I go to at least 5 or 6 times a year. Then there's Kitacon, Thoughtbubble, Amecon amongst others. There's probably loads more in America.
They can be somewhat pricey though. Although I've found unless you're in cosplay, people tend to ignore you somewhat.

They seem harder to find in the US, and are more spread-out. Sure there's probably about a dozen cons I could list-off just off the top of my head, but they're all over the four corners of the US. Even going to one could be expensive if it isn't local, let along going to multiple a year.

Websites like this are good too but if you go 'looking' for one you probably won't find one. Just because she's into games doesn't mean you'll get along.
If you find someone you really like who isn't a gamer, it's usually best to just accept them as they are. If we could all find our ideal partner, we'd be much happier but it doesn't always work like that.

Oh I agree 100%. You don't join as many online communities as I have an assume that similar interests automatically means chemistry. Heck, even in niche communities, like a forum based around a single game or series, will form plenty of antipathy among certain members who just don't agree with each others' views.

I also agree on that second bit, completely. I'd be a fool to leave a girl who's 100% what I'm looking for except that she isn't into gaming. If I meet a girl and enjoy spending time with her, then I'm sold. Just that I'm the "wants a partner who's also a best friend" kinda guy.

 

[StormShaun]

I really hate living in the most isolated city in the world. AKA Perth in Western Australia, the only convention we get is Supanova (only 5% gaming the other is weirdness, anime and such), The only way to go to a gaming one is to travel to Sydney (Hard for me to get to). And I have not seen a gamer girl apart from my Best friend's sister.

So I don't know what to do over here it pisses me off quite a bit.

 

[The Night Angel]

-snips wise words-

I agree, there are plenty of expos and cons to go to, but they probably aren't the best place to go looking. In fact going looking is probably the wrong idea too. Most of my relationships started as friendships. Just talk to people, and if something happens it happens.
And there is really no need to find a 'gamer girl' anyway. I have yet to get in a relationship with a fellow gamer, and have still been happy in relationships. As long as you accept their hobbies and interests, they will accept yours. And you can always share that part of your life with other people, there is no need to try and limit yourself to just interacting with one person. If she shares all your interests, you won't really want to socialise beyond her any more.

 

[Gnoekeos]

One does not simply FIND a gamer girl. Once every thousand years they rise silently out of the mist and if you're swift you can claim one for your own. I personally had the good fortune to meet one through craigslist.

 

[WhiteTigerShiro]

Erm...going out of your way to find a "gamer girl" to like you?

Yeah, not likely to end well.

Perhaps. Still, girls who are into gaming as much as guys do exist, and they do like having boyfriends like any other girl. It's not like it's an impossible dream, just one that's hard to make happen.

I really hate living in the most isolated city in the world. AKA Perth in Western Australia, the only convention we get is Supanova (only 5% gaming the other is weirdness, anime and such), The only way to go to a gaming one is to travel to Sydney (Hard for me to get to). And I have not seen a gamer girl apart from my Best friend's sister.

So I don't know what to do over here it pisses me off quite a bit.

I feel ya, man. For where I live, I might as well be in the same spot. I'm in the middle of butt-fuck Minnesota, a state that's so insanely in love with sports that they refuse to give-up a football team that hasn't won a single Super Bowl in its entire career, to the point of bending-over backwards to live-up to their "Do this or we'll leave" demands. Good riddance, Vikings. Maybe if you leave we can try and cobble together a decent team. -_-

 

[EeveeElectro]

Snip

You should consider converting a girlfriend to gaming. My ex did with me, I've always been a bit of a gamer but he put towards buying me a PS3 and played a load of games with me. Stuff like Mario, LBP, beat 'em ups (let her win!) and Pokemon is a good starter. Then maybe move on from there like my ex did, getting me games like Resident Evil and Silent Hill which I loved then eventually stuff like Halo and Killzone which is always fun.

 

[Smooth Operator]

Well I can only advise you not to limit yourself that way, diversity is the spice of life so while you may feel comfortable running on the same wheel it may not be the best choice in life.
Branch out and try new things, you can share your hobby with others and they share theirs, you get a much fuller experience of life that way.

If I wasn't stepping outside my hobby zone then I would have zero choice in my area, the best I got sofar are girls willing to share the hobby but they couldn't care less about it on their own.

 

[Doclector]

Woah boy. Time to pop some naive little bubbles. Usually I eat hopeful people like you for breakfast because I'm a miserable git and misery loves company, but I'm in a good mood, so I'll pop your bubbles...gently. Damn that sounded way more like a sexual act than I intended it to.

Just give up. Now. Do it.

Oh, there's a chance that you could get a gamer girl, but thing is, true gamer girls are still pretty rare. Unless she's a real circus pig (like, the female equivalent of me ugly) she's gonna be getting a lot of attention, so if you find such a girl, best find some way to really sweep her off her feet, because she'll be gone before you know it.

Worse, however, are the downright liars, the hipsters who say they play games and love nerds but, when you show your true nerdy colours, they'll recoil in disgust. Ladies, please don't get offended, because male hipsters are like that too. We should just...burn them all.

And still worst, there's manipulative b****es out there who will use you, either pretending to be a gamer girl to such an end or simply knowing they're a rare breed that us desperate nerdy guys will do damn near anything for. Again, ladies, please don't be offended, but these people sadly exist, and the dude has to be warned. Keep a stiff backbone on ya and a little corner of your mind reserved for cynical thoughts, otherwise you could get in some pretty sh**ty situations.

Basically, you're best off keeping a bit more of an open mind about this, not looking so specifically for gamer girls, because if you do, you set yourself up for a rough trip followed by disapointment, whilst making yourself a target for people who would use such rare traits to their advantage.

 

[Vault101]

I really hate living in the most isolated city in the world. AKA Perth in Western Australia, the only convention we get is Supanova (only 5% gaming the other is weirdness, anime and such), The only way to go to a gaming one is to travel to Sydney (Hard for me to get to). And I have not seen a gamer girl apart from my Best friend's sister.

So I don't know what to do over here it pisses me off quite a bit.

just hang around EB games and stalk people

haha..ok anyway I while it is nice to have somone with similar itnerests and stuff you could talk about stressing over finding a "GAMER GIRL" while not thinking about other qualitys probably isnt the healthys way to go about it

but then again I dont know crap

they exist (yes even in Perth)..but its not like you can sniff them out

Oh, there's a chance that you could get a gamer girl, but thing is, true gamer girls are still pretty rare. Unless she's a real circus pig (like, the female equivalent of me ugly) she's gonna be getting a lot of attention, so if you find such a girl, best find some way to really sweep her off her feet, because she'll be gone before you know it.
.

Im not sure thats true...the attention thing

 

[StormShaun]

Self snippy

just hang around EB games and stalk people

haha..ok anyway I while it is nice to have somone with similar itnerests and stuff you could talk about stressing over finding a "GAMER GIRL" while not thinking about other qualitys probably isnt the healthys way to go about it

but then again I dont know crap

they exist (yes even in Perth)..but its not like you can sniff them out

...I go to Eb Games enough every weekend that every staff member knows me and my friend, I even made a joke that the store is a hooker and he is the disease in her, he didn't kick me out which was awesome, we joke around there a lot. So if there was a girl that I was interested in I'm sure I would be already be stalking her (I'm joking about that). It's the Claremont store that is new and I have been a loyal customer from when it opened (Unless a cheap bargain comes across at Jb Hi Fi in the same place).

Also that isn't the only thing I look in a girl, it would just be nice to have a girlfriend that has the same interests as me.

One of these days I will find someone. ;D

 

[Daystar Clarion]

I've been with the same girl for 9 years and the most I've gotten my fiancee to play is Borderlands coop.

She isn't a gamer, sure, she'll occasionally play Professor Layton or a game of Bejeweled.

You don't need to share the same interests to be a good couple.

 

[Wintermoot]

maybe at a arc- oh wait those don,t exist anymore.
maybe in a online game? or maybe at your local video game store.

 

[Erja_Perttu]

Oh, there's a chance that you could get a gamer girl, but thing is, true gamer girls are still pretty rare. Unless she's a real circus pig (like, the female equivalent of me ugly) she's gonna be getting a lot of attention, so if you find such a girl, best find some way to really sweep her off her feet, because she'll be gone before you know it.
.

Im not sure thats true...the attention thing

It's really not. Gamer girls come in all different shapes and sizes, but unless you're a very specific shape, you'll get no more attention than an average, non gamer girl.

OT: As someone who has dated a healthy balance of gamers and non gamers, I can say from experience that what they've liked or not liked didn't make a damn bit of difference to the relationship as a whole - a major hobby can be a big part of someone's life, but shouldn't define that person and if it does, competing with someone's favourite hobby doesn't even well.

I'd say dump the specifics, find a nice person and go from there.

 

[Colour Scientist]

I've been engaged for 9 years and the most I've gotten my fiancee to play is Borderlands coop.

My boyfriend tried to get me into FPS's and made me play the Halo games, I enjoyed Half Life 2 but I never got into the genre.

I actually had a lot of fun playing them. Not that I'll ever tell him that.

OP: I don't think committing yourself to finding a gamer girl is going to work out too well. Even if you do find one you like, you're going to so intent on making her your girlfriend you'll probably come on way too strong, which is never good.

My advice is to relax about it. Put yourself in a position to meet women without actively seeking them out like a heat seeking missile, in heat... I don't recommend dismissing a girl based solely on the fact that she isn't a gamer either.