Why Can?t Men Aim?
- Thread starter FamoFunk
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FamoFunk said:
Here's your answer.
Time to be enlightened
EDIT Image was way too small, here's the link http://imgur.com/LvQLm
There's an answer, but it's pretty icky.
Women tend to pay attention because there's no aiming system at all. And is why they get so miffed when you leave the toilet seat up, because they fall into the bowl.
Men have a fleshy hose that folds in on itself when not in use. When it's re-used, it may not uncoil properly first, therefore sending the product in a direction unintended. As we're not paying attention though, and are usually looking down on a dark floor; it's easy to miss potential splashes in case you go looking.
A side effect of this is that men will often start flushing half way through the operation, and try to beat the flush finishing to finish off.
This is also followed by flatulence, yawning, stretching and all the other things we're not supposed to do in the company of women.
I've heard that this might not be only men though...
TL;DR: We're aiming on full-auto, you're aiming snap-shots.
Women tend to pay attention because there's no aiming system at all. And is why they get so miffed when you leave the toilet seat up, because they fall into the bowl.
Men have a fleshy hose that folds in on itself when not in use. When it's re-used, it may not uncoil properly first, therefore sending the product in a direction unintended. As we're not paying attention though, and are usually looking down on a dark floor; it's easy to miss potential splashes in case you go looking.
A side effect of this is that men will often start flushing half way through the operation, and try to beat the flush finishing to finish off.
This is also followed by flatulence, yawning, stretching and all the other things we're not supposed to do in the company of women.
I've heard that this might not be only men though...
TL;DR: We're aiming on full-auto, you're aiming snap-shots.
Well, the pee doesnt always go straight. One time it the pee kinda started spreading so I peed in four different directions, it was impossible to aim it all to the toilet. Hell one time when I started peeing it went straight to the right in a 90 degree angle...
I usually clean it afterwards though
I usually clean it afterwards though
Basically..FamoFunk said:
- If you pull the foreskin back or not makes a difference that you have to compensate it, making it hard to aim.
- Adding a slight extra bit of pressure makes the stream gain an extra 3-8 feet in distance, so it's hard to judge sometimes how much pressure to pee with
- Some people like to pee on the side of the toilet. You don't get the noise. Depending on how full of water your toilet fills, you may have a smaller target than you're used to...
Oddly enough I don't have most of these issues. Someone COMPLETELY missing the bowl is just sad, but not cleaning it up is disgusting...
We generally stand cause it's quicker.Jonluw said:
As for the stream, I actually got into a debate over this with my ex-mother-in-law. My simple answer, the tube it travels down isn't circular, so it makes the stream more unpredictable. And sometimes it doesn't even stay a solid stream. Just kind of sprays out in every which direction. Yes, proper maintenance does help, but even then there's no guarantees.
Think of watering in a garden with a hose, but clasping the end shut so the water sprays out quicker and wider. Same concept.
Edit: when this does happen, in my opinion the guy involved should be polite and clean up afterwards. Just my two cents.
Cause our systems arent perfect.
I mean, usually we can. Its just you always get those last few drops, unless you just bend completely over the toilet.
What makes it easier is the toilet seat is one of those U shaped deals, instead of the full ring.
I mean, usually we can. Its just you always get those last few drops, unless you just bend completely over the toilet.
What makes it easier is the toilet seat is one of those U shaped deals, instead of the full ring.
Clearly your men don't live with enough women or don't care. I can attest to the awkwardness of waking up --or maybe after sitting in an odd position or what have you-- and just plain missing because I haven't adjusted myself down there so that the liquid will form a proper arc, but about 99% of the time (drunk and sober) I seem to be able to aim fairly well. I've gotten it so that I don't even need to have the toilet seat up, which I know doesn't sound like a super awesome feat of pratice and skill, but clearly you've seen the results of men trying to pee. As was said before, most messes are caused from just peeing instead of trying to hold it for the ten seconds it takes to adjust one's self.
As for not cleaning it up? Well, you clearly live with pigs that are diguised as men.
As for not cleaning it up? Well, you clearly live with pigs that are diguised as men.
This is disgusting in public toilets. There are apparently a bunch of man rules about which urinal you should take in a public bathroom. I always ignore those and just go to the toilet with the smallest pee puddle underneath it. Some guys clearly overestimate the length of their unit and don't stand close enough.
As for piss on the toilet seat, that has less to do with aim and more about "hey jerk, you should have lifted the seat before you peed". Nobody wants to sit in your pee; not women and not other men when they have to poop. So put the damn seat up before you do your business!
As for piss on the toilet seat, that has less to do with aim and more about "hey jerk, you should have lifted the seat before you peed". Nobody wants to sit in your pee; not women and not other men when they have to poop. So put the damn seat up before you do your business!
Oh man, I hate that. Thankfully it's quite rare.Jonluw said:
Do any of you guys ever get the shivers when you pee a huge stream? Sometimes I think I lose some body heat when peeing a large amount at once, and so mid stream, I get the shivers for a couple seconds and shave from side to side and so I sometimes make a mess by accident...Is this just me?
You have to be pretty pissed to manage to slide completely off a seat! If we're standing, we're also wobbling, the toilet probably looks closer, we've likely already forgotten that we're taking a piss, AND we're having conversations through doors (even if there's no one there).FamoFunk said:
God help us if we've forgotten to turn the light on, too.
Probably because girls can't (not properly, at any rate). And because its so much fun.Jonluw said:
Hey, here's a thought: sit down and all of a sudden it's not a problem anymore. Logic is an amazing thing.