Why Can?t Men Aim?

[jrubal1462]

You're not usually peeing straight down into the bowl, so velocity is a factor. This is troublesome 'cause many urinations start with what would be described musically as something akin to a sforzando piano crescendo. That's a lot of compensation when alcohol is involved. Seriously though, if you know you're in trouble, lift the seat and/or clean up after yourself. That's inexcusable.

 

[emeraldrafael]

Do any of you guys ever get the shivers when you pee a huge stream? Sometimes I think I lose some body heat when peeing a large amount at once, and so mid stream, I get the shivers for a couple seconds and shave from side to side and so I sometimes make a mess by accident...Is this just me?

Your body actually spends extra energy to keep your piss warm while it's still in your bladder, causing it to be slightly warmer than your core temperature. When you vacate it from your body, your body has to adjust to the sudden lack of heat and you shiver to cause your body to vibrate, thus, warming yourself up.

SCIENCE!

EDIT: For those wondering where I learned that: Scouts/Boy Scouts (for you americans). It was apart of our winter camping stuff we needed to know. You're supposed to make sure to go to the bathroom right before you sleep when camping in the winter so your body doesn't waste energy warming your pee up.

No offense to you, but really, if thats what they teach in the scouts its no wonder everyone thought the leaders where pedophiles (not that there's anything wrong iwth it... in that weird way).

 

[Lilani]

I don't care what happens to your piss as it goes from point A to point B, if you make a mess just clean it up!

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

You know, I once went to a public restroom where they had installed a blacklight in the ceiling of the stalls. What the hell? I didn't need to see all that...

Blacklights are usually there to stop you being able to see your veins; and thus preventing use of drugs that need to be injected. Most modern public toilets include blacklights as standard.

Really? Couldn't there be some other solution that did not cause me to see every single spot of... unidentified liquid... on the toilet seat?

If one of those is red...you'll be very glad that you saw it...given the amount of STIs that may be in residence.

 

[superbatranger]

OT: Well, drunk because err... we're drunk.

LOL!
I refuse to accept this for the drunk answer. Even when I'm in a complete state, as a Woman, I don't just slid off the toilet and piss all over me/the seat/floor.

Well, to be fair, most of the time we're standing. Standing while drunk does get quite difficult what with the bathroom moving in circles and everything. Also, the stream doesn't always go where we want it to.

 

[smearyllama]

Well once I did a piss and it went out horizontally, how the hell it did that I have no idea.

Were you under a lot of pressure at the time?

OT: I sit, usually. At home, it's always, because we have tiny toilets and it's more comfortable.

If abroad, I tend to use a urinal, but I have a shy bladder sometimes, and so occasionally I end up using a stall.

Also, my aim is kinda awful.

 

[Wintermoot]

I wonder about the same thing, at my old school the piss was everywhere except the bowl. I decide to sit down when I take a piss (unless its school) I don,t fell less manly about it and its more comfortable then standing

 

[qDreams]

we dont care

 

[Dragonborne88]

I find it as a game. Pick a random spot in the toilet (feel like I should make that clear, I aim for a target IN the toilet), and see if you can hit it consistently, even when the spray stops being constant. Makes every pee trip fun!

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Men don't have the "Eve reaction" either. If you surprise a naked man, he'll take seconds to realise his nudity. Women will try and protect their vitals with their arms instantly.

 

[mjc0961]

You know, I once went to a public restroom where they had installed a blacklight in the ceiling of the stalls. What the hell? I didn't need to see all that...

Blacklights are usually there to stop you being able to see your veins; and thus preventing use of drugs that need to be injected. Most modern public toilets include blacklights as standard.

Interesting... Still gross though..

 

[HellsingerAngel]

No offense to you, but really, if thats what they teach in the scouts its no wonder everyone thought the leaders where pedophiles (not that there's anything wrong iwth it... in that weird way).

I'm not exactly sure how knowing how not to freeze to death in -40C weather leads into being a pedophile but... erm... uhhhh...

You know what? Get some help. =)

 

[Jonluw]

Snip

Well I like to believe its cause if some ninja jumps you in the middle of thenight while you're taking a piss you can just turn around and ***** slap them. Thats a bit harder sitting on the toilet.

Also, if you want to believe in the evolution (i've been feeling a need to add this, cause I got called out by a bunch of jesus freaks on another website when I siad believing in it without the if), considering that our ancestors used to run and piss at the same time, it makes sense for us to stand. Mainly cause it is alot more effort (EDIT) to stop, sit, and then get back up and run, and doesnt fit with the whole male persona we have to have around women.

We used to run and piss at the same time? That sounds like it'd get messy quick for us men. Guess women have the advantage at that point.

Finally, and I kid you not, this is what my friend just said. he doesnt sit (even when he poos, dont ask me how he does it cause I dont wnat to know) because he doesnt wnat this balls to touch the water.

I imagine he sort of crouches over the toilet bowl? I mean, I've tried to "sit down" without actually touching the toilet seat in desperate moments, normally including a gas station toilet.

If one of those is red...you'll be very glad that you saw it...given the amount of STIs that may be in residence.

If it was red, it would've been easy to see without the blacklight, and how do you notice that it's red under a blacklight at all? I thought blood just sort of lighted up under blacklight.

 

[Something Amyss]

Men can aim. They're just working with inferior equipment.

 

[El Poncho]

Well once I did a piss and it went out horizontally, how the hell it did that I have no idea.

Were you under a lot of pressure at the time?

Nope, just a late night piss

 

[emeraldrafael]

No offense to you, but really, if thats what they teach in the scouts its no wonder everyone thought the leaders where pedophiles (not that there's anything wrong iwth it... in that weird way).

I'm not exactly sure how knowing how not to freeze to death in -40C weather leads into being a pedophile but... erm... uhhhh...

You know what? Get some help. =)

No.. just that grown men are talking about your junk. I get creeped out when my friends Rabbi talks about circumcisions. It just seems like that place is one of those things no one should really talk to you about outside a doctor (and I get weirded out when he tests me for pull groins and hernias).

 

[FamoFunk]

OT: Well, drunk because err... we're drunk.

LOL!
I refuse to accept this for the drunk answer. Even when I'm in a complete state, as a Woman, I don't just slid off the toilet and piss all over me/the seat/floor.

Then you've never been truly drunk. Then and only then do you know you've had enough.

OT: I'll put another vote behind the "Sometimes it comes out crooked" consensus. Splashing does occur too.

You're very, very wrong, Sir.
I've many a times been to the point of no return and complete and utter mess, but one thing I can always do is piss right, even when I have to hover over the dirty, smelly public toilet.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

If it was red, it would've been easy to see without the blacklight, and how do you notice that it's red under a blacklight at all? I thought blood just sort of lighted up under blacklight.

Blacklights are usually what SOCO (UK CSI) use to detect blood traces. It allows oxygenated (red) blood to show but hides de-oxygenated (blue) blood.

Makes it almost impossible to hide blood splatters and almost impossible to intravenously inject - solving two problems at once.

I bet you thought this conversation couldn't get any grosser

 

[Berserker119]

That's why I put a scope on mine. Now I never miss.