Why is bullying still an issue?

[JDB15]

I won't get into physical bullying in my post, but cyberbulling... Dear god, I hate how people overreact to this, the media/the victims/etc, and how the "victim" of reported cases usually get suicidal. why I single out cyberbullying instead of talking about physical bullying is because the two are more or less different. (From http://www.stopcyberbullying.org) it's stated that:

"Cyberbullying" is when a child, preteen or teen is tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise targeted by another child, preteen or teen using the Internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile phones.

If this is the case, here's some better solutions:
*Over the internet: Block/ignore/flag/tell them to fuck off/etc
*Over online gaming (I doubt that this is the case but it counts): Mute the person or just leave.
*Over the phone: Delete the texts/ ignore if they call/ tell someone (ie parents to change your number if the person is constantly doing it and won't stop or the police if it escalates to a certain point, ie death threats)

I can go into depth the reason why, but I don't want to bore anyone with my personal life.

...If its not physical? Tell them to FUCK OFF! and get on with you're life.

My thoughts exactly.

 

[Zerazar]

Regretfully it's hard to deal with. Because kids lie. A LOT. And the kids getting bullied are often quite as big dicks themselves. It's just really hard to punish justly when there's no capable people around when it happens.

I could talk endlessly about how fucked the first years of school are. It needs a change of culture. More involved parents who actually care whether or not their kids are acting like undeserving scum. But most parents of bullies couldn't possibly give a fuck. Some are even proud.

And people do take lasting damage. I'm not saying kids are getting tortured, but they are very susceptible at that age, especially the early bloomers who actually think.

Meh, now I'm raging. I blame OP.

 

[Aprilgold]

In my experience? Because near damn every teacher in the system is corrupt and dickish. But thats just here in Arkansas.

Same as over here in the states.

Uh, Arkansas is a state...

I missread it and thought it was somewhere in Europe.

 

[SimpleChimp]

Give every kid a copy of enders game.

Have them read the first three chapters. Teach them to win, and to win so hard the bully never comes back.

I had one bully, one time. We fought. After that no bullies

 

[Zerazar]

Fighting back bullies is usually a losing battle unless you're blessed with a stricly superior physique.
Besides, a lot of bullying does not take form as outright fights, and kids have poor judgement, they could easily end up being the bully themselves.

 

[Orinon]

Because people suck

 

[Toy Master Typhus]

In my experience you can spread the blame to everyone:

1: Schools for being so scared of being sued, wasn't there a time where if you fucked up in school they would beat your sorry ass. And while we are on that why the fuck is it a problem to defend yourself when struck. The only time they get off their lazy and/or cowardly asses would be if you got up and said "I will put a bullet in all of you little fuckers and then put one in you teacher"(true story) and even then all they do is send you to councilor where these over paid ass clowns sit you down and tell you why your way of thinking is wrong.

2: Parents: what happened to beating your kid if he came home with a referral. Every parent now-a-days has that idea their child is perfect because he or she is the 'perfect' parent. How about you get off your pedestal of blaming everyone else and accepting some blame rather then suing every school that tells you there is something wrong with your child.

 

[VanTesla]

Well I know from my experience that most bullies are created through bad family relations. The bully could come from a abusive family, neglective parents, having parents split up, learned behavior from older siblings, being spoiled can make a child think it is above other children, and the list goes on. Many bullies where once bullied themselves.

Some people never grow out of bullying and bring it to the job they work for... I know some bullies at work and college, they don't bother me though. The worse thing possible is a bully with power like a Officer, Judge, your boss, and any elected official.

If I see bullying I will do what I can to stop it, but if it is with an authority figure that can ruin my life for doing the right thing, then I will be silent...

 

[RaikuFA]

I see it more of a societal thing. If someone's first resort is to kill themselves...and it's happening all over the country. Bullying in schools has been around since the Academy. Why is it just now that suicide is becoming more and more of a trend. When I was bullied, sure i thought of it, yeah the thought comes up everyday. But the concequences of my actions stop the urge. So I guess it is still an issue because we make things much bigger than need be.

I'm in the same position as you on that. That and my dog.

Apparently, my situation still happens to this day. Day after day I was beaten down to the point where I had bruises, a bloody nose etc. The schools response? "We didn't see anything." A teacher actually encouraged me getting beaten.

Got a feeling there's more to this story.

I mentioned it about a year ago. My gym teacher in middle school looked the other way whenever a basketball was thrown in my face, would throw me out of games if I got tackled in basketball for "causing a disturbance". Then she'd tell me if she ever got in trouble for doing that stuff, she'd make sure it would get worse.

It's 11 years later and I've been diagnosed with PTSD.

At least once a month I hear of a kid killing themself or going insane. Why does it happen? Bullying is the answer.

Well, more for the killing themselves bit. But that's off-topic. Moving on.

I want to ask though WHY DOSEN'T THE SCHOOL GET INVOLVED? I can understand cyberbullying but the ignore button is there for a reason, plus police care more about the bullying online than bullying that happens in schools.

Apparently, my situation still happens to this day. Day after day I was beaten down to the point where I had bruises, a bloody nose etc. The schools response? "We didn't see anything." A teacher actually encouraged me getting beaten. The schools response? "We can't do anything, she's a teacher." What if another teacher saw and we were dragged to the principals office? "Well, the kid with the bruises everyday probably started it so we're gonna suspend him for three days while the other gets a days suspension."

I was with you until that last sentence. I don't really follow the logic that's supposed to be at work, even though I know that you're trying to depict an unfair situation. Is that something that actually happened, or...?

I mean what do you do? Whats it gonna take foor this shit to stop?

Improve school conditions, to start with. As it stands, public schools are getting worse and worse funded and population is moving in the only direction that you'd expect it to in a time of relative prosperity. Beyond that, there's probably plenty more, but I'm rather tired and want to wrap up this post.

It was a bit excessive but once when I decided to fight back after being shoved into a wall and being kicked on the ground, we were both sent to the principals office, the guy who was kicking me? Suspended for that day. Me? Suspension for the rest of the day and the next day.

 

[Zeema]

In my experience? Because near damn every teacher in the system is corrupt and dickish. But thats just here in Arkansas.

This thats whats it was like how 3 of my schools

they only care bout there payment

 

[ConstantErasing]

As someone who attracted massive amounts of bullying for being quirky and friendly I want to address those people who seem to think the answer is just to "man up". Now the first thing that manning up brings to mind for me is the time when I was told by the staff at a summer camp I went to to "walk it off" after I broke my foot which causes me to equate the phrase with utter stupidity. I did eventually escape the bullying when I went into middle and especially high school and the bullies just didn't have enough time or circumstances to do any real bullying. However up until that point it was pretty bad. Not the worst bullying I have heard of and I wasn't seriously physically abused but it still really sucked. As a result of the bullying I turned into a harsh, sarcastic, and cynical anti-social and possibly the most emotionally stable person I know. While some of the changes were good the experience was brutal and I liked myself a lot better before I changed and it seems there are better ways to "toughen up".

Now as to how to actually stop it, well actually the elimination of time to socialize does a pretty good job of it in my school but that seems like a really bad solution to me. My schools have always been opposed to bullying and willing to crack down on the problem when asked to do so but the effectiveness of the crack downs is somewhat dubious and the school seems to have a real problem with spotting it. Admittedly the bullied student could try to seek help from the teacher but from my experience "tattling" is seen as bad by most kids and as a result a bullied kid will most likely try and simply deal with it instead of seeking help. In this case having good friends can help a lot but it still doesn't give much of a guarantee that the problem is on its way to being solved. However so long as the school itself is actively trying to stop bullying from occurring they simply need the teachers to get better at spotting it. In a school system where they aren't actively trying to stop it, as it seems many people belong to, then more awareness of the effects of bullying would be the real key and while I really hate to say this, Columbine was pretty effective for that. I am not saying I want another tragedy but that might be what it takes.

 

[Jegsimmons]

do we really have kids too chicken shit to axe kick a mother fucker like me and my pals did? dont they get at least 3 other nerd friends to end their asses?

seriously, i think kids who get bullied now a days ALLOW it to happen!


or allow the principle a shot gun with a few blanks in it (a cop is supervising too of course...and make it scarier) and have him have a student meeting in the gym/staduim what ever and say "If i hear about ANY of you little mother fuckers bullying, i will end your ass!" and then he fires a few shots in the air. that'll straighten the little shits. and for extra matter if they call his bluff, load it with bean bags.
hahahahahaha.....this is why i shouldn't work with kids.

 

[Callate]

A lot of the time the personal consequences for a teacher or staff member trying to intervene are more likely to be detrimental than the consequences of looking the other way. Just because a student is a junior sociopath doesn't mean he or she doesn't have parents who are willing to make a stink of it if their precious child is being "singled out".

But it's not a simple issue, and anyone who wants it to boil down to "they just need to stand up for themselves" really isn't contributing a damn thing except one of the world views that causes the problem to persist.

 

[RaikuFA]

do we really have kids too chicken shit to axe kick a mother fucker like me and my pals did? dont they get at least 3 other nerd friends to end their asses?

seriously, i think kids who get bullied now a days ALLOW it to happen!


or allow the principle a shot gun with a few blanks in it (a cop is supervising too of course...and make it scarier) and have him have a student meeting in the gym/staduim what ever and say "If i hear about ANY of you little mother fuckers bullying, i will end your ass!" and then he fires a few shots in the air. that'll straighten the little shits. and for extra matter if they call his bluff, load it with bean bags.
hahahahahaha.....this is why i shouldn't work with kids.

I didn't have friends growing up so I couldn't gang up on my bullies.

 

[funksobeefy]

The real issue stems from the incredibly complex background the bully has, not just the weak kid himself. Fix the issue at the start, not clean up every mess it makes

captcha: why do they put capital Os or 0s in it? makes me double check that damn thing every time

 

[Braedan]

If that kid kills himself/loses it over some bullying, I imagine he had a lot more problems than just bullying. Or was just extremely weak minded to begin with.

You Clearly have no fucking idea what you're talking about.

OT: I have no idea why schools do nothing. If another kid didn't come forward and tell me so I could avoid the situation, I would have been stabbed. What did the school do? Nothing. At all. Thanks, you can punish me, but you won't protect a 13 year old kid. Good job.

 

[Fudg40]

This stuff happens all over too. I grew up in a small community in Canada. The problem is that my family didn't fit in. So when people saw me they would attack me for my entire family. Early on I developed fears of social interaction and being noticed. This still goes on and I will willingly walk an extra 10-20 kilometers just to avoid people. Every time I reported this stuff my family would just shrug it off because that's the way things are, and the teachers did nothing either.

Now I am 6 foot 7 and in high school. Not a day goes by that I don't get called out over something. I avoid contact with people and try to be completely ignored. This is something that I will just have to deal with because no one wants to work and change this.

The sad part is I have to watch this happen to my younger brother too. He used to take part in sports and be very outgoing. Now he is quiet and spends most of his time alone like me. He gets the same stuff because this is how people were taught how to react, to put down those who are different.

I think that the only way to stop this in Canada at least, is to categorize bullying as a hate crime. That way we can go to someone and get results. The results of bullying are far worse than what we are told. When we were in elementary school we were taught that if you are bullied the worst that happens is that you get depressed, but that is not true. This is too hard a problem to be taken so lightly.

 

[JochemDude]

Why is bullying still an issue?

Because schools are not paid to resolve it... That's about it.