Why not adopt?

[Malconvoker]

Really? Why do people not adopt when they want a child? I don't get it. Is it because of the process of adoption having so many loops to jump through? Or is it just pride at pointing at your kid and saying "I made that one myself"?

If you wanted a kid and the process was easier, would you adopt and not have to go through the 'wonders of childbirth' yourself?

 

[game-lover]

If I wanted children, then yeah, I'd probably adopt.

The curiosity I have for childbirth is only fleeting really. And I'm a baby about pain so I'd probably truly wanna skip that part.

 

[Rose and Thorn]

If I ever have a kid, I plan to adopt. It isn't really an arguable question for me. It feels wrong giving birth to a child when I can look after a child that is already birthed who may not have a home of their own. A child that I KNOW I could love just as much as a child of blood.

So adoption is the only way I would have a child. I think more people like adoption then you think.

There are even many plus sides other then the obvious helping a child ones. Like being able to pick the gender, I could have a little girl. I wouldn't want a child to have my genes anyway. Another plus is over population, why bring another child in the world when there are already ones that need loving?

 

[JoJo]

There's an innate strong urge to have and look after your own biological child, indeed many parents who generally dislike children like their own. How much this affects an individual person varies completely, to some it makes all the difference, others it doesn't matter at-all.

Secondly, it's worth considering that most adopted children (around 72%) have come from at-least negligent homes, if not worse abuse, and then a year or more in a care home and so often have behavioural and attachment problems. Some people can deal with this, many can't. Often traditional parenting techniques don't work on adopted children.

There's also the fact that adopting tends to take years to complete and prospective parents can be rejected for any number of reasons: not having a large enough house, being a smoker, having medical issues, not being judged to have a stable enough relationship, being too old or young, being the wrong ethnicity... potential adopters have to allow a social worker to dissect every part of their life with no guarantee of being allowed to adopt in the end.

A lot of people when they are teenagers or young adults say that they will adopt if they ever have children but as the terribly low adoption statistics show (just 326 in 2010 in England alone out of a population of 60 million), most of them presumably change their mind by the time they've decided to do the deed with "the one".

As for myself... I'd like my own biological children but I wouldn't mind fostering either since I get on well with most children, so scratch me up for a maybe.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

Right now I'm not interested in having any children at all, but if ever came a day when I did want a child, I would adopt.
I don't see the point in having one of my own and neither does the guy I'd be most likely to have it with.

 

[Phasmal]

Simply, I wanna have my own kids.

I'd adopt if I couldn't conceive naturally. But otherwise I'll be having my own biological kids.
I've just always wanted my own kids, even if I think childbirth is terrifying.

 

[Scarim Coral]

I'm guessing some people want to keep the family bloodline going or want some genetic traits on their child. Still it make sense to adopt and also the bonus without the pain of childbirth and the whole 9 months ordeal.

 

[IndomitableSam]

I'd adopt. There has been lots of adoption in my family (my mother is adopted, for one), as well as fertility issues. Also, I goddamn hate babies. I would probably adopt an older child, 6+ as the older they are, the more chance the'll live crappy lives in foster homes and I'd want to keep them from that.

I am 29 and a woman, so this comes fom years of serious thought and some heartache, and not just an "adoption is good" sense - I have spent years considering it and debating having children of my own. I would adopt, no question. If I even can have my own kids, I will still adopt.

Still not sure I even want to do that, though. But if I do, I will adopt. Lots of personal reasons, but one is because I do not want a daughter. There is no way I could raise a girl in this day and age without murdering other children. I was also a teacher, so I'm speaking from experience, too. Not that I killed any kids, it just cemented the fact that I never would bring a child into the world that would suffer like a young girl will.

 

[Fappy]

Some people would just prefer to go through the whole natural process and come out with kids of their own. I'm honestly indifferent and would likely go a long with whichever my spouse preferred.

 

[Psykoma]

Personally, I can't have biological children, so I will be adopting.

But I can see why people who don't have to may not want to go through it (Speaking from reading about the Canadian process, I don't know much about other countries)

Adoption process as it is is incredibly time consuming and unbelievably invasive, and for all that it's no quicker (actually -much- slower) than having your own kids (for couples who don't need fertilization help).
You can expect to dump down thousands to tens of thousands of dollars on the approval process with no guarantee of eventually being approved).
You have to open up your homes and lives to government officials to peer in, judge every little issue, and demand changes to your lifestyle, and you have to follow their commands.

And even though there are over 75,000 children (in Canada alone) waiting to be adopted, it still takes in general between a year and five years for an adoption to be completed.

From everything I've seen, adopting is a -shithole- of a process to go through.

I understand that government officials don't want to just hand off kids to anyone who asks, but the process as it is is way over the top.

 

[TehCookie]

According to my mom it's because she wanted to have my father's baby. She wanted that biological link where I have her hair and my dad's eyes. My dad had that connection too, he'd always tell everyone, "I love kids, just not other peoples."

Though I'd adopt, pregnancy is absolutely terrifying for me.

 

[Esotera]

Because your genes don't exist in them, and also because kids are expensive. If I ever have kids then it would be to continue my family line and to be frank I don't want to deal with the extra issues like trauma that tend to come with adopted kids.

 

[winginson]

If I ever have children I want them to be my own, something just feels right about continuing the genetic line. Of course there is no way in hell they would ever allow me to adopt.

 

[Coffeejack]

Adoption seems like a more sensible option than adding more children to the world when there are already plenty of children who do not have much of a life to speak of.

Having said that, I am a man, and as such I cannot make the babies. Were I married, the choice would only be half mine.

Edit: I think most people's genes are already more mixed and varied than they think. The results of televised DNA tests are usually nothing short of very surprising.

 

[Flamezdudes]

It's to do with the idea of having your child rather than having somebody else's. I'd prefer to have my own child, there is more attachment and i'd care about them more.

What kind of fucking question is that? Have we gotten to the point where the concept of wanting to have children of your own is alien to half the user base here?

I agree, what's so dumbfounding of the idea of wanting your own children? It gets ridiculous when people ask such simple questions like these.

 

[Casual Shinji]

If I were to ever have children, I would want my own. Blood is thicker than water, and all that.

Also, an adopted child would never truly feel like my child, no matter how much I would love him/her or he/she would love me. There would come that inevitable moment when my child goes searching for their real parents. Situations like that create a rift that will always be there.

I'm not against adoption, it's great that children without a home can be given one, but it's not for me.

Ofcourse I'll never have children since I can hardly take care of myself.

 

[BloatedGuppy]

Human beings (all animals, really) have an a priori biological compulsion to propagate and spread their genetic material. You can argue all day that it's not sensible for a variety of very cogent reasons, but like the urge to eat and shit and sleep it's pretty impossible to ignore. The intensity with which we experience it seems to vary from individual to individual, but some people are just going to want to have their own kids for reasons they will never be fully able to explain.

 

[Zykon TheLich_v1legacy]

Because I want to have my own kids. The idea is that you and your partner mix a load of your genetic material together to make little person that is part of both of you. I pretty much echo this guys view:

What kind of fucking question is that? Have we gotten to the point where the concept of wanting to have children of your own is alien to half the user base here?

I mean why not just masturbate when you want to have sex? Why do people want a partner? I don't get it. Is it just pride...etc etc